Show us the dumbest questions about pot you ever heard!!!!

[Hundred Gram Oz]

How's this one I found today LOL I coughed up my fanta after reading this, it's from another forum though

i got a couple clones saved up and i want to try to germinate them any suggestions?

 

[ZEROorDIE]

just go this one this weekend when i was trying to give some advice to a newb

"High pressure sodium, isnt sodium salt. that wont work plants need uv light only"

 

[Philosophelon]

So this guy comes into the shop, and says he has spider-mites and needs organic pesticides. I sell him some Bang and some Einstein Oil, and he leaves. Comes back a week later and says they are getting worse. So he buy's some more pesticide, and he leaves again. Comes back a week later, and buys pretty much every kind of pesticide he hasn't tried, and leaves again.

So he comes back FOR THE FOURTH TIME and he is beside himself. No matter what he does, it has no effect on his mite infestation, and he's about to lose his crop.

"Alright," I say, "Tell me a bit about your infestation problem. When did it start, what do the pests look like, what does the damage to your plant look like, etc."

"They're like regular spider mites," he says, "But they're so small that you can't see them at all, even with a magnifying glass, and they make brown spots on the leaves instead of white ones!!!"

Me: "Do you use R/O or tap water?"

Him: "R/O, man"

Me: "Do you use a calcium supplement?"

Him: "Nope"

I couldn't help it, I just started laughing my ass off. Because I realized that this idiot had just spent the last three weeks spraying every pesticide known to man trying to treat a Calcium deficiency. So I sold him some Cal-Mag, saved his crop, and I got this story out of the deal.

 

[motaco]

Have you ever tried it?
I know that back in school, we placed white flowers into solution with dye, and the flowers would suck up the color and the petals would turn color... I don't think he is that far off... if grape juice will do... i don't know... but it's deff. possible to alter a plants color using some sort of liquid dye.

Oh with white petals I definitely believe it. I think pot has too much chlorophyl to make much difference. Depending how it was used it may or may not with food coloring I don't know.

I wasn't laughing about the food coloring I was laughing at the idea of watering your plants for the final weeks with grape juice to get them to turn purple. Whatever dyes are contained in grape juice are nowhere near the amounts of sugars and everything else that make up grape juice. I don't know what using grape juice for watering does, but I'm guessing what color they ended up will be the least of your problems.

But if I'm wrong hell. This is break through information. We can have orange buds with orange juice. Red buds with cranberry juice. The sky is the limit. Or maybe whats in the juice isle at the market is the limit or something. I don't know.

 

[afguerrilla]

Oh with white petals I definitely believe it. I think pot has too much chlorophyl to make much difference. Depending how it was used it may or may not with food coloring I don't know.

I wasn't laughing about the food coloring I was laughing at the idea of watering your plants for the final weeks with grape juice to get them to turn purple. Whatever dyes are contained in grape juice are nowhere near the amounts of sugars and everything else that make up grape juice. I don't know what using grape juice for watering does, but I'm guessing what color they ended up will be the least of your problems.

But if I'm wrong hell. This is break through information. We can have orange buds with orange juice. Red buds with cranberry juice. The sky is the limit. Or maybe whats in the juice isle at the market is the limit or something. I don't know.

I can see it now.

"This is that hawaiian punch dro."

 

[basilfarmer]

the cops said you make a thousand dollars a plant, so im a gonna make 10 thousand dollars of these 10 plants with this 400 watt light?

 

[ParanoidFarmer]

"Is it true that if you smoke a lot of weed and you use your piss to water your plants with, you'll get the best weed evar?"

Yup, it's happened.

 

[Spicoli]

"Female plants have 7 leaves, and Male plants have 5 leaves"

Yes someone has tried to tell me this before and it was very very hard not to LMAO.

 

[THC•20]

Well I haven't heard any "dumb" questions yet, but I remember me asking a question before I started growing I knew nothing about trees or plants or what to do with them so I knew nothing and I asked "how do you harvest cannabis?"

 

[fredflintstoned]

when your doing pot, how do you get the seeds through the needle?

 

[PazVerdeRadical]

when your doing pot, how do you get the seeds through the needle?

get out of here!

 

[Moldy Dreads]

Where can I get THC worms and how do I get them to live in my plants?

 

[cellardweller]

joking around with a friend on the phone the other day about noobs not knowing how to use the search function here and just posting thread after thread of the same ol tired shit...he says..

"yeah, next thing ya know, theres gonna be a thread titled..
What Color Cups Should I Clone In? "

bwahahahhahahahahhahaahhahahha

 

[exploziv]

I was asked for at least 10 times during the past 4-5 years ""what part of the plant is smoked?"" it's funny how most of the people think leafs are the parts to be smoked, not the bud. i even told them that roots and stems are smoked as a joke and some of them had no problem taking that as real. of course then I told them that buds are the part of the plant to be smoked and that they should read a little more about growing and smoking before starting to grow.
Also I was asked like 3-4 times ""what is the corect method to kill a rat and put it in the soil as plant food?"" Yeah I know this is odd... but this is happening because some of the people in my country don't know enaugh english to have acces to great information over the internet and because someone posted on a forum in my country about 10 years ago as a joke that a rat in the soil of indoor plants is really all that cannabis plants need. full story here quoted from another post of mine:

And the funniest thing about some of those people is that about 10 years ago a discussion was started about smoking pot on a hip-hop forum in my country (Eastern Europe BTW), and some guy wrote there as a joke that you can grow cannabis like a normal flower (as your mum does with hers), but because canna needs more nutes you should kill a rat and place it the soil. from there the discussion gone crazy for many pages. The funny thing is some people who want to grow cannabis now are still asking about that rat... how to find a rat, how to kill it, how to burry it... and so on.

I know... some people just seem to be stupid.

 

[FoothillsFarmer]

One of my ex's mother, who was completely clueless to MJ and how it's used decided at some point to ask the entire church congregation that they pray for her poor daughter, as she was "shootin up the marijuana" and was SURELY going to be lost to the Dark Lord of The Underworld himself... lol

 

[basilfarmer]

I remember showing a friend a plant outside but we must forgive him, he hasnt anything to do with pot & he doesnt smoke, he looks at the plant - that was in veg with no buds - and says - wow - when you chop that all up and dry it, you'll have a lot. lol

 

[TheCheeseMan]

Will bong water make your plants more potent?

Can you grow weed with a blacklight?

If I clam bake with my plant, will the leaves absorb the THC and thus become more potent?

Can you smoke the leaves?

 

[ZEROorDIE]

Can you grow weed with a blacklight?

ive heard this one so many times. what plant can really grow under a blacklight i mean seriously

i had a kid tell me he was growing a plant under a blacklight at night and putting it in the sun during the day.

 

[glacier]

someone said this to me a few weeks ago

"whose dumb enough to buy marijuana seeds? i find them in the weed i buy all the time"

 

[rave420]

when your doing pot, how do you get the seeds through the needle?

well, you crush 'em and then go a usuall, use piece of cigarete but as a filter, draw up, and remember, the artery you're hitting has to have bright foamy blood, otherwise you miss the shot! Then, marijuana trees are growing out of your arm!