Girlfriend is demanding I open the locked door. What to say?

[mrwags]

I gotta give props to JJ on this post.

My wife is RED I mean really red doesn't smoke has maybe a dozen times in the 30 + years we have been together. B4 we got married I told her I loved her and that I would do anything in the world for her but I don't drink but I smoke pot. I do so now I will do so later and I more than likely will be doing it when I die,then I asked her why she moved out of mom and dads house?

She said for her freedom and to be able to do what she wants and I then ask her then why would you EVER get in a relationship that is what you were running from in the first place.

The three F's are imho the key to my success in the 30 + years I have been with this wonderful women.

Feed Me
Fuck Me
And Be Faithful

She said back then it was to simple and marriage was more complicated than that and I smile and say let's me show you how K.I.S.S. is a much easier way to approach things and that any dumbass can make something complicated but a smart man will always make it simple.

The double life thing JJ brought up trust me run's through her mind. What is behind that damn door.

If in your heart she is the one honesty is the simplest way man I'm telling you from experience. They ALWAYS find out the truth in the end that is why they will always rule simply because most men think with the little head and we all know a little head means a little brain if one at all.

I read a tag line here I like,if you always tell the truth you don't have to remember a damn thing. And man to man we need it that way to even have a chance.

Trust Your Heart
Mr.Wags

 

[TruthOrLie]

Honestly, what would YOU think someone had two sealed rooms for all the time? If you were completely clueless to the realities in the world and just watched the news for your 411... what's behind doors #1, and #2 legitimately if you're not suspicious of bad activity? Are you a top secret photographer for National Geographic and those are your processing and developing rooms? Hope you got some fancy cameras laying around.

Honestly, if you have enough loot to pay for 2 extra rooms you really need to change how you operate. Get yourself a little studio apartment to bring the girly over to. Tell her you moved because those "guys" wouldn't empty the shit out of the other rooms... and you were tired of being the guard dog.

Meanwhile, now you've got another bedroom to grow in.

 

[chefro420]

Tell her your gay and your bf stays in there .

Your playing with fire having that in there and your girls staying in the same place. A good loud argument , neighbors here you guys yelling .... Po po at the door!! Be careful too, Im sure she has already discussed it with her girlfriends a 1000x over already .

I lucked out . When I met my wife , she had quit smoking for a while . She had no issues with it when I told her shortly after we met, as she used to smoke a lot too. I will say Im probably on the lucky side though . Takes a special woman to understand . I will say though it does cause friction still from time to time, nothing serious though.

 

[cyberwax]

Show her this thread.

 

[Mr. Bongjangles]

Some of these comments are pathetic at best......

Number one, the dude likes her, and he doesn't know whether she's cool with it or not... It's still way to early to tell her the truth, but if some of you guys would dump someone because you grow there's a lot of lucky women out there....

Second, would all of you guys give up having a family in exchange for growing? I hate to inform you but it's human nature to fall in love and start a family at some point. Maybe some of you prefer beating it I guess.....

Nobody suggested this guy can't have a girlfriend, a family, or sex. That is a straw man argument.

He was a douchebag about it by having the girlfriend at his illegal grow 5 days a week when she had no knowledge about it, thus exposing her to felony-level risk behind her back.

Nah - the only thing pathetic here is how the thread starter handled his relationship and threw moral implications to the wind because he was afraid to be alone and too stupid to rent another apartment.

 

[Cheerful]

Also, this can be said about anything, but if you think they know, they know. Maybe your lack of actually smoking cannabis lead to such a poor lapse in judgement? I make all types of dumb decisions when I'm not high.

This has been nagging at me since the start of the thread. I think this guy is a JDGI.... Just Doesn't Get It.

 

[SOTF420]

I keep seeing this speculation that she gets popped too if he gets busted while she is there but in reality that is not true since she is not a legal resident at his address. Yes she would get arrested but as far as going down for it or being convicted that would be a pretty slim chance with no prior knowledge of the grow or any involvement whatsoever.

Probably better she does not know, and just because someone is at a growhouse that by all other appearances is just a normal residence and they have no drug related priors then that does not mean they are automatically guilty of any crime whatsoever! Unless they are involved with the grow or aware of it the whole putting her at risk argument is total speculation and bullshit. Of course if she get's you busted you swear up and down she knew the whole time

 

[dagnabit]

I keep seeing this speculation that she gets popped too if he gets busted while she is there but in reality that is not true since she is not a legal resident at his address. Yes she would get arrested but as far as going down for it or being convicted that would be a pretty slim chance with no prior knowledge of the grow or any involvement whatsoever.

unless she is asleep in the bed..
and her seized property...
and her name in the paper..
probably loose her job.
but hey after paying bail and a lawyer she might just get off...
maybe.
but she should have the choice whether she is made to squat and strain in front of a burly female corrections officer shouldnt she?

 

[Mr. Bongjangles]

I keep seeing this speculation that she gets popped too if he gets busted while she is there but in reality that is not true since she is not a legal resident at his address. Yes she would get arrested but as far as going down for it or being convicted that would be a pretty slim chance with no prior knowledge of the grow or any involvement whatsoever.

Probably better she does not know, and just because someone is at a growhouse that by all other appearances is just a normal residence and they have no drug related priors then that does not mean they are automatically guilty of any crime whatsoever! Unless they are involved with the grow or aware of it the whole putting her at risk argument is total speculation and bullshit. Of course if she get's you busted you swear up and down she knew the whole time

All the cops are gonna know is that she is there 5 days a week.

If they want to be dicks about it and prosecute her too, I bet any jury would believe she knew about it & helped based on the amount of time she spent there.

You seem to assume the cops will know she doesn't know about the grow and didn't help, but why would they possibly think that when she basically lives at the grow house?

 

[Titch]

Build a cupboard behind the door.. put some stuff in it..

Unlock the door and there - it looks like a cupboard.. with some stuff stored in it.. just like you said it was.

 

[Cheerful]

All the cops are gonna know is that she is there 5 days a week.

If they want to be dicks about it and prosecute her too, I bet any jury would believe she knew about it & helped based on the amount of time she spent there.

You seem to assume the cops will know she doesn't know about the grow and didn't help, but why would they possibly think that when she basically lives at the grow house?

And even more importantly, why would they care?

Ohh Ohh Ohh I know why! Because it's just a plant!!! Everybody knows that, just ask Zack! Zack is Pretty Sure she won't get into trouble because it's just a plant.

 

[headband 707]

kill the bitch LOL

 

[Durdy]

Hahaha i wonder how freaked out this girl would be if she knew how many people have suggested her demise over the last two days

 

[JJScorpio]

You must have missed all the "dump her", "get rid of her", "throw the bitch out", "throw it to her one more time and get rid of her" comments....... I think about 80 percent of the comments suggest this.....

I hate to be the one to drop this bomb on you guys, but if you think someone that smokes or grows won't rat you out just as quick, you're wrong..... I know just as many women that don't smoke that are cool with their partners doing it as ones that do smoke... By now the thread starter should have been feeling this out and trying to figure out where she stands with this.....

Nobody suggested this guy can't have a girlfriend, a family, or sex. That is a straw man argument.

 

[Vash]

Here we go again - the POWER of the pussy. Stellar bud and money in one hand; pussy in the other. No brainer. She paying rent? He who makes the money, makes the rules. You can find "good" sex anywhere. Stop thinking with your dick.

 

[booghy]

Telling her is really not an option unless you were 100% certain she was down and would never say a word. And even then I would say you have to be sure this girl could be it cause it definitely aint worth it if shes just another short term relationship. I say go with the you rent it for storage to someone line for now until you crop out. Then either set up shop somewhere else, which really wont be any different cause now you have to make excuses for where you go all the time, or just shut down. You haven't really given any details like how big is grow and that. Why not downgrade to half of one of the rooms and build a false wall and then stack a bunch of boxes and totes in front. Let her peek in there one day and see there is nothing to see. Tough spot but I don't think telling her is an option. Who knows what could happen down the line and thats something she will have on you.

 

[Wise]

You have to go with your gut. JJScorpio's advise is solid as usual.

 

[Rednick]

You must have missed all the "dump her", "get rid of her", "throw the bitch out", "throw it to her one more time and get rid of her" comments....... I think about 80 percent of the comments suggest this.....
.

Most of these aren't because of the security breach.
A woman scorned is dangerous, dumping her hard could just send her over the edge.

Most of these comments are because she DEMANDED he unlock the door.
She "doesn't KEEP SECRETS" from him, she says. BS. Show me a 'little miss thang' that doesn't keep a secret and I will extract a secret with natures truth juice. ALCOHOL.

From what we have been given, all signs point to "Crazy bitch, great sex, hope it all doesn't come falling down".

Just ask the guy with the IV coke sex toy.
"I don't think it was her?"
"I mean yeah, she demanded my caddy and money, or she would call the cops. Later I took my car back, shortwhile later my LEO buddy tells me to shut down"
Hmmm, could it be SATAN?

Id, Ego, Super-Ego...

Or, you could roll the dice and see if she wants to fuck in the middle of your flower room, just try not to snap too many branches.

P.S. This better not be a Yummybud thread or some other grad Psych student.

 

[rachaelhccc]

Here's a chicks perspective on the situation...1. You need to assess your relationship. Do you think this is going anywhere? It doesn't sound like it to me. You mentioned "sex", "friendship", and not trusting her yet. If you've been having sex and being friends for months and you can't trust her, that's a big red flag. If so, then you don't need to tell her anything,and you shouldn't. And you should wise up, great sex is not worth putting yourself at risk...you can get that anywhere.

2. If you do think you'd like to take it to the next level, then you need to tell her soon. The sooner the better. This way you can tell her the truth, that it's something you can't just tell anyone for obvious reasons. Tell her that you have really appreciated your time together and that you do trust her and want to let her into your life. Thank her for being so wonderful, and make her your girl officially. (yes I'm helping you not get punched in the face here) If she can't be cool with it, then she's not the girl for you. Growing is a life-style, and a passion, and you would be better off being with a girl you can be down with that, and won't make you feel like shit about it.

 

[indoor/outdoor]

Teller Your Gonna get a job and change then when she leaves fire one up . You already lied to her , she knows and theres not much you can do now ,oh yeah i forgot you could just lie to her.