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thoughts in the nite..

lumberjack.mr

Active member
For anyone who might be proud of me; I am going to testify before the Texas Senate, at the capitol tomorrow. I thought that at least one person I know - off of here- would say Alright, way to go , or Wow, that's awesome.. None here, not even my not so sweet wife, who has a bit of ward work to do, so I can drive my own , seizure having ass there.
You know ,when a terminally ill spouse- me, hears that his wife is not appeased by him in any way; not sexually, physically, emotionally, of even companionship, from his wife owns mouth, it fucking kills you inside, and when rather, than say " I'm sorry, of I didn't mean for it to come out like that, they tell you that every word of it was/is true, it takes any will that i had left to live , and kills it before it can grow!
I have sworn so many times that if a wife of mine, ever said anything like that to me ; like her mother berates her father by, i would never be here to hear another word. Now, that is exactly what has happened/ is happening, and I have nowhere to turn. No friends, she drove all of them away years ago, because I wasn't spending all of my time and attention on her. No family, after all of the bullshit I grew up / survived before I went to live on the streets @ 15. So I have no one, no where, and no way of turning any direction!
hEARTBROKE AND DYING, IN FUCKING Texas !!!
 

waveguide

Active member
Veteran
i was going to say some shit about losing things, but adding words over the internet may not help to find balance in the equation :p

betrayal is some tough shit. betrayal by lovers, women, the world.. well.. from my perspective, i feel a bit silly for not expecting it. was i supposed to remain in illusion forever? it's tough when you're not the one to say when, but.. when would you be..

thankfully, weed :)
 

armedoldhippy

Well-known member
Veteran
give 'em hell at the Capitol tomorrow...for ALL of us...a lesser person would fold under the shit that has been heaped on you, LJ.
 

armedoldhippy

Well-known member
Veteran
waiting to hear from you, LJ. have not seen anything in the news yet about the hearings, normally something shows up on Topix...
 

lumberjack.mr

Active member
Had a couple of very hard days.. Testified at the State capitol, before the Senate Judiciary Committee, on the benefits I receive from medicinal cannabis , and the subsequent extracts!
I even got to shake hands with the Governor of Texas, and have a ONE ON ONE conversation in chambers, for over 45 minutes!!
TEXAS IS GOING LEGAL!!! lj.mike
 

armedoldhippy

Well-known member
Veteran
I tried to check out the footage of your session, my ignorant computer would not let me because of the security levels it has...dammit!
 

lumberjack.mr

Active member
It was the proudest moment of my life! thanks for caring enough to look.. looks like I'm headed for divorce AGAIN! Seems I am not allowed to get angry at anything, or one, and she has no faith in us being able to remain together, and be happy. I remember when all i had to do was walk into the room, and she was glowing, not anymore.
Heartbroken in the HELL of tEXAS! lj.mike
 

armedoldhippy

Well-known member
Veteran
nothing lasts forever, try to hang on to the good memories as long as you can. they will be all you have in the end...:huggg:
 

redlaser

Active member
Veteran
No small task being an activist in Texas I'd imagine, especially on camera. Respect for sticking your neck out for your beliefs like that. Gotta look for the positive somehow, even when your neck deep in negative, it's really the only option. Easy for outsiders to say I suppose.
 

lumberjack.mr

Active member
well, got the lawn mowed anyway. today has been a very tiresome one for me. As a result of my trip to the state capitol, to testify before the Criminal Jurisprudence Committee, and the Senate floor, I have been inundated with e-mails and friend request on the social media pages, and have even been contacted be Senators that want me to return to Austin to speak in their briefs and agenda. i gotta tell you folks, I had no Idea that I would be this swamped with attention! I awakened today to over a thousand e-mails, and after 7 hours of scrolling and typing; my fingers are worn out as my mind!https://www.icmag.com/ic/album.php?...m.php?albumid=57014&pictureid=1418367:tiphat:
some folks just cant stay happy! This helps..
 

wolfhoundaddy

Member
Veteran
One of my all time favorites. The other day my son told me he was born in the wrong decade. he's playin drums in a band right now.
Mike, looks like you got a new ride....get on 'er!
 

armedoldhippy

Well-known member
Veteran
"you must give some other undeserving cretin positive rep points before giving any more to lumberjack.mr...." stupid computer! :) good on you, LJ! :woohoo:
 

lumberjack.mr

Active member
Today was another treatment day. Not so bad this time, but still dialysis.. I have been inundated with e-mails and phone calls . I guess i made a pretty good impression in Austin! I was wondering about that. I spent a total of 28 hours going there, testifying before the Criminal Jurisprudence Committee, testifying before the House of Representatives, and then doing a marathon of trips from one end of the capitol building, to the other; making appearances inn different Senators and lobbyist, before finally leaving the capitol at ~2:30 am- to drive 5 hours back home! I thought to stay in Austin, but really had no choice, as I had to be back for dialysis @ 11:am. By the time I sat down in "the chair" I was so exhausted, I could hardly feel the needles being set, and don;t even remember if they gave em any Benedryl.
I had another seizure this weekend. I was lucky , it was a short one, and nobody was here, so no body freaked out on me - again! I have never witnessed a seizure of the magnitude mine can be. I don't remember anything, just a black-out or blank in memory. If I am lucky, I am not injured from convulsing/thrashing.. I have awakened to knots all over my head, and bleeding from my face.. Not fun. For the past several weeks, I have been fortunate enough to have been able to use the RSO , but it ran out last week, and I have started having the seizures again, and more frequently. I wet 6 + weeks without a single seizure! Since I ran out of the substance, I have had three. That, and still have a trip back to Austin on Monday. I am speaking at the Austin Reggae festival, and am scheduled for treatment the next day, again. I hope that the people I am fighting for, have some appreciation of how much work it takes to change a law! I may , or may not live long enough to see this change come to TEXAS, but if I don't, it will only be because the legislators are too dam stupid! well- that and the Red Neck Hard-ass attitude of Texas Law Enforcement. I Will keep fighting, and I will make a difference! Lj.mike
 
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