What's new
  • As of today ICMag has his own Discord server. In this Discord server you can chat, talk with eachother, listen to music, share stories and pictures...and much more. Join now and let's grow together! Join ICMag Discord here! More details in this thread here: here.
  • ICMag and The Vault are running a NEW contest in October! You can check it here. Prizes are seeds & forum premium access. Come join in!

My Wife, I Hate Her.

I

IE2KS_KUSH

Oh wow hey guys thanks for the support. As for growing, yes seperate and stealth. This is why I have been on the bench for sooo long but my time is coming...
As for the job and life, yes, check check 1. 2. All is well thank you guys for the support. Ewwww.... sorry I didn't post thinking about someone coming across it for the first time LOL geez sorry about that LOL! Just the same though thank you guys for the sincere and sometimes funny conversation/free therapy.
 
Before reading this, set your mind to what your son is going through, instead of your own life. When you have a child, your life is 2nd place until death.

I read your post about your wife. This is what I have experienced when I was growing up.

I was 6 years old when my father lost his job. My mother took it quite hard because he was the only source of income. My father had a decent job and although a smart man,he was a college drop-out with no education. So when he lost his job, getting another one became a very difficult task.

My father was in and out of jobs -dead end jobs- and all he was trying to do was make ends meet, for nearly 6 years. My mother would throw things at him, beat him, make childish remarks, swear, kick, and worst of all - scream. She would scream and scream so all the neighbors could here and ultimately she knew that embarrassed my father more than anything else. He was kicked out of his own house, forced to live in his 89' celica during 8 degree weather, and hand over every dollar he made to her, for his children.

As a man, he was faced with this: two sons which he loved dearly, a bipolar wife, and a mortgage. He was contemplating the same decision you are brought to as of today; do I divorce and break this family, leave my wife to rot on unemployment? Or do I stick it out and continue, work with my wife, attempt to change her and land a job where I can get 5+ years from it.

All-in-all, over the years he was a good man, and tried his hardest to continue living. Until one day, he could no longer maintain his good behavior.

He was in the shed, out in the yard, summer day. His order for the day from my mother was to paint the fence. She went inside the shed, and I knew she would provoke him like always and a huge fight would occur. Only this time, things would be different. I heard her scream, "This paint isn't the right color!" Saw her walk out with the paint, drop it all over the grass and said 'What are you stupid, Allan?!'. My father ran up and threw a punch, stopping just inches from her body. I have never seen or would ever predict something like this. I saw fright in my mother's eyes and I knew this was something she has never experienced either. Later that evening, I was beckoned downstairs by my mother in between her sobs. I looked at her face and there it was: a bleeding lip and bruising.

My father had finally punched my mother in the face. Over all these years of being abused and items being thrown at him - fire pokers, coasters, glasses, books, furniture, food - anything she could find. All the physical terror she unleashed on him had finally mounted to this one point. I was to betray my father and automatically take my mother's side when the police arrived. I had to take the picture of my mom's face for evidence. I felt so ashamed I had to take sides and thought this responsibility wasn't what someone my age should be juggling.

Shortly after the event, talk of divorce was floating around the house. As a child, I felt awful. I almost felt like it was my fault. Maybe if I didn't exist money wouldn't be so tight. Maybe if I were to disappear, fighting wouldn't happen any longer. Fighting and objects that have been thrown at lethal force became a natural feeling. I started to become accustomed to the swearing; witnessing adults attack each other. But divorce, was something new. Something that I felt I caused, and that as a kid, turned my world upside down.

To everybody's surprise, divorce never came. They seeked therapy, and they really, really tried to work out their differences. My father became stronger, my mother less psycotic and fighting was less and less every day. A permanent swear jar was installed. Our house was a was a war zone; but the bombs have fallen and the debris was clearing. People could breathe in our house again. Laughter bounced off cold walls that absorbed so much crossfire. Life continued, but in a more healthy manner.

Now what does my childhood have to do with your problem you are thinking? I expressed my thoughts as a child to you, so you could feel what its like for your son at some extent, and what could be in the future.

If you actually read this you will be thinking about what is really good for your son. A divorce is very confusing and hurtful to a young boy or girl. If you tell your son, "This is not your fault", you will NEVER know what he is thinking or feeling.

Your wife sounds like my mother. Just because she was having a bad day, her entire world has to come crashing down with her. The problem with my mother and probably with your wife is she feels the world centers around her own self. Your wife probably doesn't know this, and if you told her, she would either a) retaliate or b)direct the blame from her to someone else; namely you.

Little things like passwords and childish remarks are so minor. There is something beneath the surface that is bothering her.

Seeking counseling and therapy works ONLY if both members try hard and really have the means to correct their own problems and then their partners.

You can start to tell your wife 'we' have a problem and I want what is best for 'our' son. Let her know the immediate events that will occur if things continue. If she wants to continue, seek therapy. Deep issues will come out.
 
C

cyberwax

this was one giant depressing read, and i would have to advice as probably everyone else in here; even tho you have a child(and you mention you dont want to take him away from his mother, meaning you will probably have custody?) your life must go on, and it is short so dont waste ur time with hate. Take your son with you and find purpose!
 
S

sparkjumper

as I sit here a 50 year old grower/hermit childless and without any relationships,I feel like the luckiest man on earth!Good luck
 
I saw the MOST amazing ass today, this girl knew how to wear jeans and she had some sort of cowgirl boots on.....I think she was Hispanic and very tall. Any married man would want a divorce, to just see this girl naked.........soooo hot! I've seen a lot of high class porn and nobody has an ass this good, or at least a very very few! Saw her at the Grocery store outside at a DVD vending machine. Saw my buddy walk out right after that and he missed her, then went on describing the same girl that was at the library looking at DVD's......a priceless chick!

I really had to tell someone and this place seems the least demeaning to say that, as it doesn't shame any girls I know. A totally amazing girl, didn't even get to see the front of her face....but man! Could of fit a tangerine between her thighs, just below her crotch without any pressure from her legs while she is standing normal.....yet some nice cheeks, just wow, wonder about a girl like that in an Ugly City such as this one!
 
I

IE2KS_KUSH

Hey just wanted to mention, a page or so back, I think some folks may have missed it, but I am separated and getting a divorce from her, for the folks that are still advising me to get the hell out, I am!! Thank you folks!

And for those of you that told me before, months ago to do as much, but I said, "no I am gonna try blah blah...and oh things are looking good blah blah,"

Well you were right, I was wrong. Ideally I wish it would have worked, but it's not an ideal world, and I am seeing the multitude of benefits now for not only my son, but for me not being w/ that bitch anymore. I look forward to the future now in a way I have not in quite some time.
 
Well, if you'd quit the marriage before you were ready to, you might have had doubts or regrets, so I understand. Life should be lived with no regrets and in order to NOT HAVE regrets. But it should also be lived without looking back, so I encourage you to move forward and stick to your guns now that you've made this decision.

And please, please, please, do NOT grow right now. Wait it out! And be safe!
 
I

IE2KS_KUSH

^^
Great post thank you...
and no I am not on the grow yet, but I can smell it in the air, it's closer, it's getting near YEAH!!
 

intotheunknown

Active member
Veteran
wow great post, reminds me of something so very familiar...
but a great friend told me this once, and it kind of relaxed me in the situation... in any marriage, one of you has to be the retard. which one are you?
hope that makes the gears turn a little. hope all goes well for you man.
 
Just as long as you don't end up like THIS:

Umphrey's Mcgee Lyrics

Utopian Fir Lyrics

You've got to go where you know by now
You've got to leave it where it lay

These are the days of the fir reunion

There's a house on the hill that glows
You can smell it in the air


These are the days of the fir reunion

You've got to go where you know by now
You've got to leave it where you lay

These are the days of the fir reunion

There's a house on the hill that glows
You can smell it in the air

These are the days of the fir reunion

***Couldn't resist!***
 

m0ff99

Active member
Easy there KUSH its been ages since i checked in on you,i see you have made some hard decisions.....good for you man and for your son. Hope all goes well for you. Wish i could send you some stash to tied you over, i hate knowing a dude cant grow his own for some f*cked up reason, but you just know the post office will catch that shit!! Well gotta go, i'll check back some time soon see how you getting on,peace!!
 
I

IE2KS_KUSH

Easy there KUSH its been ages since i checked in on you,i see you have made some hard decisions.....good for you man and for your son. Hope all goes well for you. Wish i could send you some stash to tied you over, i hate knowing a dude cant grow his own for some f*cked up reason, but you just know the post office will catch that shit!! Well gotta go, i'll check back some time soon see how you getting on,peace!!

ThAnks for the kind thoughts I appreciate it. lol no weed in the mail for me! I don't mind sending but receiving no thanks! I will get by atm I am quite the schwaggxpert.. nonetheless I can't wait to get growing again!:laughing:
 

FRIENDinDEED

A FRIEND WITH WEED IS A . . .
Veteran
IE2KS_KUSH - dude, you so do not know how insanely parallel our lives are. im not bullshittin you , i am dead serious.

i have a son and daughter, past couple of years they have been coming back into my life with the aide of my wife now.

trust me, u HAVE to leave and take that child with you!! hes a boy, YOUR son!! only a man can teach a boy how to be a man!!! and that first post!?!? i went through THE . . .EXACT. . .SAME... .THOUGHT. . PROCESS!!!!!! fuck that bitch, take your son and go, lawyer up and do what needs to be done.

i havent read the entire thread but that first post was ll i needed to see!!! yes it does take you a long time to realize what you have to do, and you dont want to imagine your life that way, but you caught a bad one, happens to us all, trust me cuz, be damned if your not alone!!

my situation is coming to some sort of normalcy, the judge told her if she ever tries to keep my kids from me again, she goes to jail!! she's on probation LITERALLY, and for sure she will go to jail. . . LITERALLY!!!!
 

Stoner4Life

Medicinal Advocate
ICMag Donor
Veteran


Kush bro, I go to sleep & wake up with a hatred for that bitch that words just fail to capture, so much so that I'd gladly kill her; not to do you any favors bro, just so that I might sleep better at night is all.......


:biglaugh:
 
S

sparkjumper

Yea if it helps any I hate her fuckin guts tooI hope she gets hit by a car or suffers an anurism.I hope she wakes up tomorrow and has a no tits and a tiny male penis.
 
Top