Is it common to have no friends?

[Spaventa]

I have plenty of friends where I come from but I rarely get to see them since I moved away. Sinced I moved here I haven't made a single friend, but thats not amazing since I make absolutely no effort to, but sometimes I wish I had a pal local to me, that I could get stoned with and do stoner stuff, oh well.

From what you say aboutyourself medbreeder, I think a person would be glad to know you, unless you smell...you don't smell do you? kiddin' lol be lucky fella

 

[kbn727]

Cannabis is an introspective drug. Try to lay off the herb a bit

 

[med_breeder]

Cannabis is an introspective drug. Try to lay off the herb a bit

Introspection is something that I think is lacking in too many people.


but for the record I have been dry for about 3 weeks, a little more, a little less, I haven't been keeping track.

since I have been feeling these intense feelings of lonliness, I have laid off the herb. Weed is very introspective, and when I feel like this, I want to look outwards.
when I hit a rough patch like this, I will do anything to not realize the silence and emptiness.
recently my drug of choice has been stupid tv programs. The dumber the better.
and with the writers strike, it's easy.

 

[newbieb]

Get in touch with old friends, and become friends with them again.

 

[Bababooey]

I think the point is that meduser feels that he's lonely and wants friends.
Plenty of people have responded saying they don't have any close friends and prefer it that way. And that's all well and good, diff'rent strokes for diff'rent folks.
Meduser would like to make closer friends at work but with his hobby that's not a good idea. So what to do?
He should try to join any clubs or groups that share his interests: movies (indies, horror, anime), video games, recreational sports, whatever your interests. Unless you live in a small town and such groups are scarce.
Maybe you can post on craiglist, looking for 420 friendly people to hang out with, strictly platonic. Of course, in that situation, you'd have to be careful not to get burned or used (see above posts) .

 

[Yummybud]

Hey don't feel bad, I have no friends and look at me I'm totally normal.

hahahahahahahahahahahahah hahahahahahaahahah (crazy laugh).

 

[Yummybud]

i haven't had friends for like 3 years now but I don't really care, it's hard finidng friends.

sometimes it's nice having no friends, some friends want to hang out all the time and it gets annoying. Everyone needs friends though, I'm just not very social and don't make many friends.

 

[Blackvelvet]

Dude, your normal. Come here anytime. Don't forget to smoke a joint first. Your pal, Velvet.

 

[NOKUY]

i dont think it's "common" to have no friends.

...even me the "misanthropic backwoods recluse" has friends.

tho usually more than i need.

 

[Bababooey]

i dont think it's "common" to have no friends.

...even me the "misanthropic backwoods recluse" has friends.

tho usually more than i need.[/QUOT

See, even the recluse has friends. Just cause you live in the woods doesn't mean you have to be Ted Kacynski.

 

[TwoOhSix!]

why does dealing do that to people? I could never get close to people (especially women) and the only thing i thought about was $$$....

When you deal you seem above everyone. They come to you for their shit, it's just kind of a power trip. They are customers, they make you money, therefore your attitude towards them is different, as well as your relationship. But you network so much that you end up meeting a lot of people, it's just kind of a fake friendship sometimes.

 

[Feyd]

Forgive me for not reading the whole thread, but I thought I would add my two cents to it anyways :]

As far as being normal or abnormal... I think it's more normal than most people think.

I don't think it is normal to not have any friends at all for your entire life leading up to your death unless you intentionally try to avoid people. You will eventually cross paths with that one person who wants to be your friend no matter what, who is probably in the same boat as you.

Try to meet people at social gatherings or clubs, where people feel more outgoing. Generally people prepare for these events by dressing nicer than they normally would, or doing whatever it is that they do that increases their self confidence and willingness to talk to somebody they don't know--aka, make friends with new people.

As for myself, I have come to realize that I don't really have any "true" friends either.

I had friends in junior high, and I had to make new friends when I moved to florida to start my freshman year of high school. I made some good friends but had to actually move back to the same town I had just came from two and a half years previously. I moved back and everyone I had known had changed or left.

So I made new friends. These are the same people I still talk to even after graduating over two years ago, but I have slowly come to realize after moving away from that town about 3 months ago, that they were never really much of friends.

It clicked with me about a week ago that I never hung out with any of them individually unless pot was involved. The only one I actually did hang with solo didn't do drugs. He was a cool dude, but whenever we would hang out with anyone else he would turn into a dick. To everyone, but I was a common target. Probably because I'm so good natured and would never return fire. I'm 6'4 and have a good amount of natural muscle mass over him, and I could seriously damage him in a fight, but fighting is barbaric and childish, plus I never really got angry to the point of violence. He did tick me off quite a few times, but never struck any nerves. He would later on blame it on catching a "contact buzz" from the blunts being passed around him.

I never talked to or received any responses from anyone about hanging out, I only talked to these so called friends if I was with my one "friend".

I now live in Charlotte, which is a much larger place than where I came from, and I don't know anybody here except my brother. So I'm looking at this as a new start so to speak, time to see if theres anyone out there who is interested in being friends with someone simply on the premise of sharing a bond, not getting high and getting into trouble.

Sheesh, I didn't mean to write a novel there folks

Hope you find happiness whether it be from good friends or good herb

 

[Orangecrush]

I know this might sound lame, but some of the greatest friendships I have, have been started from online gaming.

I started playing online PC games when I was 12 or 13 and I still talk to a lot of these people today. I find that in online relationships you have to be more descriptive about yourself and you learn more about someone that way.

If you are into PC gaming try finding a clan or a guild that is in game and get to know those people. You may end up enjoying yourself quite a bit. Its just one simple solution and good luck.

 

[specialk]

Forgive me for not reading the whole thread, but I thought I would add my two cents to it anyways :]

As far as being normal or abnormal... I think it's more normal than most people think.

I don't think it is normal to not have any friends at all for your entire life leading up to your death unless you intentionally try to avoid people. You will eventually cross paths with that one person who wants to be your friend no matter what, who is probably in the same boat as you.

Try to meet people at social gatherings or clubs, where people feel more outgoing. Generally people prepare for these events by dressing nicer than they normally would, or doing whatever it is that they do that increases their self confidence and willingness to talk to somebody they don't know--aka, make friends with new people.

As for myself, I have come to realize that I don't really have any "true" friends either.

I had friends in junior high, and I had to make new friends when I moved to florida to start my freshman year of high school. I made some good friends but had to actually move back to the same town I had just came from two and a half years previously. I moved back and everyone I had known had changed or left.

So I made new friends. These are the same people I still talk to even after graduating over two years ago, but I have slowly come to realize after moving away from that town about 3 months ago, that they were never really much of friends.

It clicked with me about a week ago that I never hung out with any of them individually unless pot was involved. The only one I actually did hang with solo didn't do drugs. He was a cool dude, but whenever we would hang out with anyone else he would turn into a dick. To everyone, but I was a common target. Probably because I'm so good natured and would never return fire. I'm 6'4 and have a good amount of natural muscle mass over him, and I could seriously damage him in a fight, but fighting is barbaric and childish, plus I never really got angry to the point of violence. He did tick me off quite a few times, but never struck any nerves. He would later on blame it on catching a "contact buzz" from the blunts being passed around him.

I never talked to or received any responses from anyone about hanging out, I only talked to these so called friends if I was with my one "friend".

I now live in Charlotte, which is a much larger place than where I came from, and I don't know anybody here except my brother. So I'm looking at this as a new start so to speak, time to see if theres anyone out there who is interested in being friends with someone simply on the premise of sharing a bond, not getting high and getting into trouble.

Sheesh, I didn't mean to write a novel there folks

Hope you find happiness whether it be from good friends or good herb

Great post, but ur avatar creeps me out dude every time i see it


What pisses me off these days is that in the past 10 years i lived in dozen of places and picked up a bit from here and there

Either you stick to travelling all the time like i said in a post above or you move to one great location and stay there and make friends

Unfortunately right now im stuck in a shit hole town

 

[ladybird1124]

No answers.........

No answers.........

I thought you posed an interesting question I have asked myself the same maybe for different reasons nevertheless it is hard being a grower and having friends unless you are into the party scene. I don't advertise what I love doing growing , can't invite old friends to the house. Don't drink so why go out to bars at night, I am good looking and have done my thing, your thing and some else's thing my adult life so pity is not it, aloness and isolation is my choice , which I will get plenty of since my relationship just broke down completely.

 

[hunt4genetics]

I am greatful for a loving family. I have been racking my brain for the last few minutes.
I don't think I have any real friends. I have people that I shoot the sh*t with. I have guys at work that I make lude comments about women with. But if I am painfully honest with myself, i have no true friends. I have no friends that would go to battle with me. I just have people in my life that we just pass time with. yikes, this thread has kind of made me depressed. It has forced me to face things that I didn't want to deal with.

 

[BirdDawg]

I feel lucky. I have two very close friends. I married one of them. Even so, its never been an easy road. There are tons of people I "know" through one thing and another, work and play, but though I would loosely call some "friends," when it comes right down to it, there are 2. Both of whom I am and will be eternally grateful to for their help, support, and just being there for me when I need them. I believe they both feel the same about me. Each of us is unique, and with that fact alone it can be difficult to find another person who "fits." Even my 2 best friends can drive me nuts on occasion, but I've come to accept that, knowing that overall I am better off having them around, loving them, and being loved in return. One of my favorite sayings is "Every one of us is f*cked up in some way. The trick is in finding someone whose f*ckedupedness you can live with."

 

[Lord Fatwa]

I guess I wanted to re-up this thread because I wanted let you know that I too am friendless. I think my case is kind of pathetic because my solitude is based on my fear.

Here's the thing, two years into high school, I had the most friends I've ever had; not a whole lot, but a good number. Then, I went to rehab and totally isolated myself, rationalizing that I was "keeping sober." After a year of out-patient rehab, I got out and starting smoking pot again, but I was WAAAY to afraid of hanging out with my old friends. For some reason, I just thought they would make fun of me and disrespect me if I tried to join their circle again.

So I hung out with a smaller, different circle of people. We were anti-social as well, never really going to parties, but we had a lot of fun, just the three of us.

I went to college, made friends, but FOR NO REASON AT ALL, isolated myself because it was comfortable for me to do. Now I do have friends from college, but I've moved back home, and they are either too far away or we've fallen apart since then.

So now I'm friendless, living at home, and could hang out with a good number of people but I won't. I'm too comfortable in my solitude to change that, and that kinda makes me sad.

But you know what, I'm just gonna keep on livin' man. Hopefully, it'll change soon. But for right now, I'm feelin' alright.

 

[gizmo]

sometimes people can be quite happy in their own space with no-one to disturb them(myself)
in the past i played ice hockey with a large group of friends
also done my time in the forces but because i find myself at 42 with a "loner" attitude i dont find myself worrying about it personally i find i'm quite normal(i think lol)
some folks need others around for happiness
some dont

 

[Bubble Puppy]

Great thread ,

I find as a whole people dissapoint me ,the things people do ,the way they act ,the obvious judgement some pass on others after short introductions,things like that .

I tend to be very introverted ,i spend alot of time by myself .I have a few really good friends,but not many .I spend my free time cutivating plants ,all kinds ,not just cannabis,it has become my obsession.And is actually bennifitting me in many ways.

Im sure its more common as you get older to not have friends.Although being a hermit for a long time .1 time about every year ,ill buy a plane ticket ,often by myself ,and fly away to Cambodia ,Morrocco ,Spain , or some other county and throw myself in the middle of some place where ,i don't speak the language fluently,and meet people .This puts me back into real life ,and makes up for all the boringness of solitude

While this may not be really healthy to be in solitude ,its a very easy uncomplicated way to live without hassles,or problems of people .except the lonliness part.

You sound normal by my accounts ,to each his own