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I have a chest full of mad jars and it has a lock on it, someone has been stealing

exploziv

pure dynamite
Administrator
Veteran
get a black hooded robe and put a ZODIAC symbol + on it and put a flashlight and like a single high-heel and a knife inside.

:laughing: :laughing: I read your post 3 times and for the first 2 times I tought you are into voodoo or something like that... I'm still not sure that you aren't.. LMAO.. I might be just too stoned. :laughing: :wallbash:
 

Euphrates

Member
I'd buy some fake buds online, better than ruining real ones, soak them in preferred solution (Gasoline any one ?).. and never mind what it might do to these pricks.

Plus I would eventually beat the fuck out of sisseys bf, or as he's leaving, knock his ass out from behind, put him in the car, poor liquor all over him and some in his mouth, put his keys in the ignition, and roll his ass down the hill into a poll and call the police.

I would let the "friend" off with a warning, but would de-friend him for sure, let him know he fucked up, and that wasn't cool. or give him some fake buds soaked in gasoline, up to you..

As for the sister. Tell the harlot she fucked up to, and if she ever does something like this again, she'll regret ever being born.

I would also consider hiding dog poop and dead fish in everyones car, don't get caught. :2cents:
 

zoidb3rg

Member
Even your moms will set your ass up, set you properly gassed up, be duckin in the bushes to light ya ass up - biggy

Yes!

Just read through and i guess my instinct was right, i didn't think it was the right words, but i'm way too blazed to even consider trying to remember it. still my comment stands biggie is a genius ^^.
 

willostat

Member
either move or setup a weekly allowance for your sister. Your friend on the other hand, shouldnt be labeled as such.
 
H

h^2 O

I'd buy some fake buds online, better than ruining real ones, soak them in preferred solution (Gasoline any one ?).. and never mind what it might do to these pricks.

Plus I would eventually beat the fuck out of sisseys bf, or as he's leaving, knock his ass out from behind, put him in the car, poor liquor all over him and some in his mouth, put his keys in the ignition, and roll his ass down the hill into a poll and call the police.

I would let the "friend" off with a warning, but would de-friend him for sure, let him know he fucked up, and that wasn't cool. or give him some fake buds soaked in gasoline, up to you..

As for the sister. Tell the harlot she fucked up to, and if she ever does something like this again, she'll regret ever being born.

I would also consider hiding dog poop and dead fish in everyones car, don't get caught. :2cents:
i like the cut of your jib. I would say urinate on some buds :)yoinks:), dry them and put those into the chest.
 

TreAndKat

New member
I can guarantee that if you get them to smoke bud you pissed on, your anger will be no more. These two fucking friends of mine had stolen from me and then tried to purchase a sack afterwards as an alibi. One sturdy indica bud and a little bit of my asshole later I was carefree. And to this day, whenever they piss me off, I just smile. I've told them before... "no matter what you do, what you think you can do...I've won." I just remind them occassionally, and since they know they're little betraying bitches, they go crazy trying to figure out what shit I've pulled. They just don't know the shit-pulling was literal.

Piss on their buds.
 
W

Weedman Herb

Ok ... First take all your weed out of the jars or replace them with empty ones ... call the 3 friends and family into the room where the Not So Safe is ... tell them you have been saving them a Huge surprise (I'm assuming you aren't squirreling away an 8th in a lockable box so this should excite them ... they know what's in the box) ... Open the whatever it is and hand them each an empty jar ... swear that it is full of bud ... or that it should be ... as you didn't smoke it ... then turn your back on them forever. They're sneak thieves ... the worst kind of thief ... because they act like they love ya and think they are getting over (they think you're a fool) ... ending their miserable existence Might be doing them a favor ... just walk away ... they don't deserve your love, respect or weed ...
 

Pythagllio

Patient Grower
Veteran
I can guarantee that if you get them to smoke bud you pissed on, your anger will be no more. These two fucking friends of mine had stolen from me and then tried to purchase a sack afterwards as an alibi. One sturdy indica bud and a little bit of my asshole later I was carefree. And to this day, whenever they piss me off, I just smile. I've told them before... "no matter what you do, what you think you can do...I've won." I just remind them occassionally, and since they know they're little betraying bitches, they go crazy trying to figure out what shit I've pulled. They just don't know the shit-pulling was literal.

Piss on their buds.

I'll bet you put pennies up your ass by the thousands.

http://www.funnyordie.com/search/ass pennies
 

TreAndKat

New member
Ok ... First take all your weed out of the jars or replace them with empty ones ... call the 3 friends and family into the room where the Not So Safe is ... tell them you have been saving them a Huge surprise (I'm assuming you aren't squirreling away an 8th in a lockable box so this should excite them ... they know what's in the box) ... Open the whatever it is and hand them each an empty jar ... swear that it is full of bud ... or that it should be ... as you didn't smoke it ... then turn your back on them forever. They're sneak thieves ... the worst kind of thief ... because they act like they love ya and think they are getting over (they think you're a fool) ... ending their miserable existence Might be doing them a favor ... just walk away ... they don't deserve your love, respect or weed ...


And yea... I totally agree with this. A good book is a hell of a lot better than a bad friend. Ditch those fuckers.
 

One Love

Member
sounds like an ass kicking is in store brotha. be straight up and honest with them and tell the males that its time to pay-up like a man, or be ex-communicated (as your friend) for being a thief.

wrote a poem about it, wanna here it? here it go...

only thing worse than a thief is a snitch,
both of em greedy as a gold diggin bitch.
lieing and stealing will have you face down in a ditch,
not even the dr. can sew you up with a stitch.

(think i need to work of my poetry skills :p)
:rasta:
 

zappa66

Member
smoke them up then right as they are about to blow out their first bongload mace em' a lesson not to be forgot...or hey just a little dab of mace juice in the bottom of the bole...

then again I'm a non violent dude, a gallon or two of maple syrup in their car's gas tank. Repairs will more than cover your lost weed.

edit*
give them each a fat doob and tell them its the best stuff you have ever had, you traded all your "old" weed for a few lbs of this stuff. Lace each joint with salvia 60x. They don't want your weed anymore...make fun of them for being pussys and freaking out on your "new" dank weed.
 

Kizzattack

Member
Here's a cheap and sure soloution: put some bee's in the jars. Leave some buds in the jars, and leave everything in it's usual place, but put a few bumble bee's in the jars. Nothing worse than going to make a spliff, only to be attacked by bee's instead.
 

sackoweed

I took anger management already!!!! FUCK!!!
Veteran
I would go to the porn store and buy a giant dildo.. And leave that and only that in the chest with a note saying smoke this pipe you fucks~!!!! Or i would take all but 2 or 3 jars out and the left over jars i would fill with oregano, parsley, or some hot ass spicy herb that looks like nuggsz. And laugh like fock when u gt home and they are all messed up.. red eyes cos they burn. nose leaking, throat on fire.. lmao.. Or if it were me family or not id beat that ass like Chris Brown!!! peace..

sack
 

Mister Postman

The Plant Pervert
Veteran
I'd roll up some balls of hash half-half with shit, n let them enjoy..

Reminds me of the shit parm sandwich I wrapped up all nice nice and left for the fucking drunk bums who were taking our garbage bags from the dumpsters going through them during the night, and leaving the place a mess. you wanna eat my garbage, eat my fucking garbage, but dont leave the place a mess afterwards.. Lesson learned I'm sure
 

stasis

Registered Non-Conformist
Veteran
I only trust people at the same "place" that I am... Those who are not BROKE, with the same quality of clones/genetics that I have...

Those without ENVY.

Anyone without a good growroom is a threat... In fact, they WILL almost always steal if given any opportunity.

There are a few who would not do it... Stick with those people.

Sheesh, so annoying. Even ones' SEEMINGLY good friends are not impervious to the temptation.
 

Snagglepuss

even
ICMag Donor
Veteran
Sheesh, so annoying. Even ones' SEEMINGLY good friends are not impervious to the temptation.


i just had a friend of 12+ years take 1/2 ounce,when some of my stuff was mixed in with their camping gear,after a recent trip.Called him on it,he lied .I even offered to give him 8th for free.But he decided to lie and keep the whole thing.

I think in the persons mind they think ,well he's growing it ,so its really free for him ,and he can make more,so that justifies me stealing it.

This friend (1 of my top 2)ive known for so many years/outings ,and his brother as well.I just couln't belive it,but thats whats happens .........
 
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