exercise . even if ya don't feel like it. since I been kayaking regularly and hiking I feel so much better.... sometimes when I hike real far out I stop and scream at the top of my lungs... crazy but man it feels amazing....peace
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depression and anxiety
- Thread starter relic1981
- Start date
I also have a long story and I need Cipralex in order to keep my depression down, Lito to keep inside "speed limits" and Xanax for a constant anxiety. Racy weed gives me bad panc attacks so I stick to indicas (for pain) and switch strains when possible. We´re all different, sometimes acceptance is the only way to manage without contantly having to beat oneself up over "why".
I've been going through this for about 17 years. I'm finding myself in a particularly bad place to be for myself, and am having a hard time not dwelling on things. I have Xanax, but am trying so damn hard to get off that shit. I decided today that I'm gonna take a break from smoking for awhile to see if that helps. Everything makes me anxious it seems.
I was doing so well, then one day I had one of my horrible panic attacks that I thought I was past. It was last friday and I havnt been able to go out or to work ever since. I tried to take my trash out and had another panic attack. The only way I could do it was to take 2 mg of Xanax and I was down to only .25-.5mg on the days I had to work.
Feel like everything just went to shit in a matter of minutes and have been trying so hard to snap out of it. Started medicating heavily and no help, just got worse if anything.
So I'm right here, trying to just find a way to calm down. If I just dont smoke tonight, I'll be fine. If I do I'll be right back to where I was and I need to make progress or I'm gonna end up in a really bad place.
It's the first day that is so hard for me to get past, especially the first night. I dont even know if its for the best. I just don't know what to do anymore to be honest.
I was doing so well, then one day I had one of my horrible panic attacks that I thought I was past. It was last friday and I havnt been able to go out or to work ever since. I tried to take my trash out and had another panic attack. The only way I could do it was to take 2 mg of Xanax and I was down to only .25-.5mg on the days I had to work.
Feel like everything just went to shit in a matter of minutes and have been trying so hard to snap out of it. Started medicating heavily and no help, just got worse if anything.
So I'm right here, trying to just find a way to calm down. If I just dont smoke tonight, I'll be fine. If I do I'll be right back to where I was and I need to make progress or I'm gonna end up in a really bad place.
It's the first day that is so hard for me to get past, especially the first night. I dont even know if its for the best. I just don't know what to do anymore to be honest.
Hello,
One major factor, so often overlooked, is the possibility of PARASITES.
Do a Google search on ( parasites depression ) and you'll be amazed as to how well they mimic depressive disorders and anxiety.
Treatment of choice: Nitazoxanide
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nitazoxanide
A body under constant attack is nervous, anxious and depressed...
Ojo
One major factor, so often overlooked, is the possibility of PARASITES.
Do a Google search on ( parasites depression ) and you'll be amazed as to how well they mimic depressive disorders and anxiety.
Treatment of choice: Nitazoxanide
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nitazoxanide
A body under constant attack is nervous, anxious and depressed...
Ojo
I think you could check out Ibogaine as a plant that might help. It works against addiction, as well as depression.
Google: ibogaine highstreet nl
There are ibogaine testimonials on Youtube. It is a real plant, it really works. What it does is reset the symptoms of addiction, so you don't go through a withdrawal phase. It is a trip that involves physical detoxification and psychological cleansing.
It is reasonably safe, but you cannot be high when you take it, at least on anything other than weed. And you have to be in a reasonably good state of health. And have a, preferrably experienced, sitter.
B
BrnCow
I knew someone that had good results with a hit or two of blueberry...but other strains caused him to experience heart palpitations and freaked him out...Big Bud was one. He was bipolar and took a few meds but one he didn't like because it flattened his emotions was called Tegretol or something like that.None of those SSRI and stuff worked right and made him want to drink and drive fast - suicidal in other words...so be careful. There are new drugs coming out I see on TV but the side effects are scary.... One big thing is to make a promise to yourself that no matter what, this world and the fuckers on it are not going to get to you. Then you are stuck here for good and it seems to make you a little more grounded....you do have as much of a right to be here as anyone else does...
Thank you guys, I really needed that. I've been on just about every SSRI with no effect other than feeling nothing, or horrendous side effects. I'm an alcoholic, but it's been almost two years since I last drank. Everytime I'd go to the Dr. they just wanted to put me on another drug instead of treat the underlying cause. That's what got me on Xanax. I've been off and on it for 10 years, and pretty regularly the past 3 years. I hate it. I'm addicted to it, there's no way around it. Even just taking .5mg a day creates withdrawals for me and complete rebound anxiety. I'm scared I'm gonna be out of work for at least 6 months while I kick that shit (Heard somewhere that for every year you take Benzos it takes about a month to start to feel normal again, so at least 6 months for me with everything probably..)
I dont mind smoking, I actually enjoy it a lot. I think somehwere along the line with all the SSRI's and Benzos my brain chemistry changed and now I honestly cant handle most smoke without a panic attack.
I made it through the night without smoking, feeling a little better, but soo shaky. Monday was the last day I took Xanax.
I am fucking bound and determined the get off fucking Xanax permanently. That shit is terrible, so terrible for you.
I figure if I take a break from smoking the anxiety should be curved down, then I can cleanse my body of the damn Xanax and hopefully start to get my brain to bounce back to normal. It's gonna be hell, for what's gonna seem like forever, but I can't live like this anymore. I'm 27 and have had enough of this crap.
Maybe in 6 months or so if I'm feeling better I'll try smoking every now and then, but I don't think I'm gonna go back to daily smoking. I really am an addict and shit just gets ridiculous.
Thanks again guys, I already feel better knowing that people care and I'm not alone in this.
I dont mind smoking, I actually enjoy it a lot. I think somehwere along the line with all the SSRI's and Benzos my brain chemistry changed and now I honestly cant handle most smoke without a panic attack.
I made it through the night without smoking, feeling a little better, but soo shaky. Monday was the last day I took Xanax.
I am fucking bound and determined the get off fucking Xanax permanently. That shit is terrible, so terrible for you.
I figure if I take a break from smoking the anxiety should be curved down, then I can cleanse my body of the damn Xanax and hopefully start to get my brain to bounce back to normal. It's gonna be hell, for what's gonna seem like forever, but I can't live like this anymore. I'm 27 and have had enough of this crap.
Maybe in 6 months or so if I'm feeling better I'll try smoking every now and then, but I don't think I'm gonna go back to daily smoking. I really am an addict and shit just gets ridiculous.
Thanks again guys, I already feel better knowing that people care and I'm not alone in this.
my heart goes out to you and i hope you are doing better. i def feel you on the not knowing what to do anymore. so often have i felt that im trying my hardest and nothing is helping. just a quick question.. have you tried meditation? i still havent gotten this next bit perfectly yet but the concept of accepting you are having high anxiety or a panic attack, whatch it but dont fight it and just let the anxiety disapate. a dr told me this breaks the adrenaline cycle (stops the addrenalin from being pumped through your brain) like i said i dont have this down perfectly yet... its hard for me to let go and just let the anxiety happen. i have a deep instinct to fight it which works to my disadvantage. regaurdless, hang in there... things will get better. it just takes a lot of hard work. (as im sure you know)
Had to comment ,taking a break form smoking can do wonders especially if chronic takes about a good six weeks though to clear head and sleep proper again. As I just went thru it and it was tough .Also read ECKHART TOLLE books best thing I ever did helped me so much with all the shit swimming in my head some one said meditate and stay present excellent advice .Hoping the best for u guys cause I know there s a way out without meds.Bud
I was suffering from anxiety about thirteen years ago. It all started with a single panic attack in traffic. That was the first and the last panic attack i ever had. I thought carbon monoxide was coming in my vehicle at the time.
After that point I was anxious and plain unhappy. I don't know how i survived that time in my life. it was bad.
Drinking was the only 100% relief of my constant feeling of chest pressure and a restriction in my adams apple area.
well i spoke to my doctor and did some reading. the doctor said he wanted me to try prozack.
That was all i needed to hear and i changed everything in my life. No drinking no smoking cigarettes no more caffeine and no sugar. positive eating. I had a completely overhaul. That may seem hard but i was not a happy camper and i had everything to be happy about.
let me tell you i was a week or so in to this and at 8:00 pm i was falling a sleep. I hadn't slept in years before that,well not real sleep at least.
My anxiety dropped by 80% and my life changed just like that.
Well that was awhile ago and my life is good, I do get situational anxiety, I just know myself much better and its over before it starts. Anger is a killer.
I Cut out all drama and anyone who is providing it. I only let the good into my circle and the rest can bounce. Well that's that.
I hope you all find some peace
After that point I was anxious and plain unhappy. I don't know how i survived that time in my life. it was bad.
Drinking was the only 100% relief of my constant feeling of chest pressure and a restriction in my adams apple area.
well i spoke to my doctor and did some reading. the doctor said he wanted me to try prozack.
That was all i needed to hear and i changed everything in my life. No drinking no smoking cigarettes no more caffeine and no sugar. positive eating. I had a completely overhaul. That may seem hard but i was not a happy camper and i had everything to be happy about.
let me tell you i was a week or so in to this and at 8:00 pm i was falling a sleep. I hadn't slept in years before that,well not real sleep at least.
My anxiety dropped by 80% and my life changed just like that.
Well that was awhile ago and my life is good, I do get situational anxiety, I just know myself much better and its over before it starts. Anger is a killer.
I Cut out all drama and anyone who is providing it. I only let the good into my circle and the rest can bounce. Well that's that.
I hope you all find some peace
B
beakermuppet
Hang in there brother, addictions are a fickle f'n bitch for sure!! Been down that road a couple times unfortunately. Sounds like yer motivated and really want to quit which is more than half the battle in my humble opinion. This is gonna sound really lame but, when I get depressed (which happens a lot more often than Id like to admit) I keep reminding myself that I really don't have to feel that way, I DESERVE to be happy. My life might not be perfect but I'll run down a list of all the positive things I have going on in my life and try to focus on them. Even phoning a friend or going out for coffee can lift your spirits/take your mind off feeling like shit from depression/with-drawl. The first couple days are the hardest for sure........I used to feel like I was losing my mind, but just keep reminding yourself your worth it, and that you can do it.........focus on how GOOD your gonna feel when the with-drawl/depression is over. I feel for ya bro, went through this crap a couple of years ago (addiction that is) still get bouts of depression, but Ive come along way I think. I'm in university in a program that's really hard but that I find very interesting......and getting very good marks. I kinda made school and getting good grades my new drug (still smoke pot, but def not as often) and I made it MINE. Something I'm doing for ME. There's light at the end of the tunnel brother, just hang in and you'll get through. B
this is key. "emotional vampires" really do suck! pun intended
they drain you of positive energy and leave you nothing but stressed. sometimes these people are unavoidable but do not give them power over you. establish solid boundaries, break free from the guilt complex so many of us anxiety sufferers face, and live your life passionatly. do things for yourself and always have just as much compassion for yourself as you do for others. we have to advocate for ourselves.
these things arent about being selfish but being proactive, taking back control from people who cause you stress and taking power away from the anxiety itself, and taking personal responsibility for your own physical and mental health. we have to make ourselves happy or content. again, its not being selfish because in doing so, everyone (your friends/family) will benefit. (hope that makes sense) is it a lot of work? hell yeah but its worth it. i look forward to a day when all irrational anxiety is behind me. im on my way, one day at a time. im definitely not anxiety free yet but im trying my hardest and i can see things slowly changing in my life. now more than ever am i trying to live my life to the fullest. a life full of meaning, sparked and driven by the passion(s) inside of me and not defined or derailed by anxiety and self doubt. we all have have the potential to live a purposeful, anxiety free life.. you just have to find what your passionate about and do it while cutting down on unneeded things in your life that only make it more complex. (baggage) its hard to do, but again, it is worth the hard work.
start slow, minute to minute if thats what you need. and if you have to take 6 months of work to get off the benzos do it. you will qualify for at least temporary disability, take the time to get well and then you will be better off than you are now. you may even end up with a better job! (not sure of your job situation) i know its a scary thought to put your life on hold and maybe have to quit your job but you have to do whats in your best interest for your peace of mind. once that gets back on track there will be no stopping you and you will thank yourself. sorry for the novel folks, lol. have a great night everyone and a nice religious holiday if your into that and remember to something good for yourself!
Xanax more or less saved my life when my anxiety was at it´s worse about 20yrs ago, SSRI´s have helped too but the combo weed and meds keeps me going. I tried fighting the Xanax but I feel that my brain chemistry is off and that I actually need the meds. Nowadays I actually feel pretty good. Healthy lifestyle, good food, meditation and why not acupuncture. Hang in there.
Thank you guys so much. Today is day 5 of the break from weed, and its been 8 days since I last took Xanax. I'm falling to sleep slightly better, but the night sweats are horrible (I'll take it as a good thing, my body getting that shit out).
I felt trapped in my house the past few days and decided I had to force myself out and do something. I can't hide from the feelings. If nothing changes, nothing changes. I'm learning I have to accept them and even embrace them, then I will be able to cope with them much better and not be dependent on chemicals.
I decided to go out to the store and get some salad and chicken and vitamins, stuff to help my body cleanse and get back up to pace. I started to panic, but then all the advice started to kick in.
I figured "if I'm gonna have a seizure or die, its gonna happen, there's nothing I can do about it. I cant sit around doing nothing expecting things to change. What happens happens, and I'm ok with that. It is what is is, and it WILL be fine. I need to go through this in order to become stronger. It's time to take a hold of things and get my life back once and for all."
After that thought the feelings persisted, but after a few minutes of shopping it got better. Still very uncomfortable and shaky, but I just accepted it and it slowed down a lot. Pretty much what relic was saying earlier.
I dont feel as bad as I did when I quit drinking(that detox only lasted a few days with a couple depressed weeks afterward.), but there is this really disorienting sensation I feel constantly, almost like I'm stoned but I'm not. I keep bumping into crap and have felt extraordinarily stupid as of late. That's all the Xanax(at least 90%), after the first day of not smoking I pretty much reset, but these pills are a whole other ball game.
I was considering smoking a little bit again, just to help with the Xanax crap. I figure I'll just tough it out though. Only way I'll smoke again is until the Xanax is out, and my head starts to adjust, or if I actually have a genuine seizure(probably just me worrying).
Ironic part is I have more weed now than ever in my life and nothing to do with it. Guess it'll get a realllllllly nice cure, lol.
Thanks again everyone, I've so glad I found this thread, and ICMAG in general. Lots of good people on here.
Take care everyone and have a beautiful day!
I felt trapped in my house the past few days and decided I had to force myself out and do something. I can't hide from the feelings. If nothing changes, nothing changes. I'm learning I have to accept them and even embrace them, then I will be able to cope with them much better and not be dependent on chemicals.
I decided to go out to the store and get some salad and chicken and vitamins, stuff to help my body cleanse and get back up to pace. I started to panic, but then all the advice started to kick in.
I figured "if I'm gonna have a seizure or die, its gonna happen, there's nothing I can do about it. I cant sit around doing nothing expecting things to change. What happens happens, and I'm ok with that. It is what is is, and it WILL be fine. I need to go through this in order to become stronger. It's time to take a hold of things and get my life back once and for all."
After that thought the feelings persisted, but after a few minutes of shopping it got better. Still very uncomfortable and shaky, but I just accepted it and it slowed down a lot. Pretty much what relic was saying earlier.
I dont feel as bad as I did when I quit drinking(that detox only lasted a few days with a couple depressed weeks afterward.), but there is this really disorienting sensation I feel constantly, almost like I'm stoned but I'm not. I keep bumping into crap and have felt extraordinarily stupid as of late. That's all the Xanax(at least 90%), after the first day of not smoking I pretty much reset, but these pills are a whole other ball game.
I was considering smoking a little bit again, just to help with the Xanax crap. I figure I'll just tough it out though. Only way I'll smoke again is until the Xanax is out, and my head starts to adjust, or if I actually have a genuine seizure(probably just me worrying).
Ironic part is I have more weed now than ever in my life and nothing to do with it. Guess it'll get a realllllllly nice cure, lol.
Thanks again everyone, I've so glad I found this thread, and ICMAG in general. Lots of good people on here.
Take care everyone and have a beautiful day!
Ive also found my system stays excessively acidic when i have low periods, i'm guessing partly from stress hormones acidifying the system, but also the digestive balance get's messed up which also acidifies you from poor assimilation,, seems both you can mess your gut up and suffer for it and it can mess you up.
I'm guessing as well that since all the veggies nicely realkalise the body and promote a healthy gut fauna that that may be a big reason why it helps rebalance you. But the effort to look after yourself seems less and less worthwhile the worse you feel about yourself and it can spiral down within days.
It can seem like it is all about you and you are cursed but once you realise that you are not currently yourself at all and you have to battle back towards full health and then go beyond that to assure your stability things will get brighter and brighter and before you know it you are looking back on the whole thing thinking jeez i nearly let that diseased state take me out.
also you are mostly water and that water in your cells is aligned to a extremely high state of crystallised order, it is actually known as the fourth state of water and explains every problem that the current cell biology model fails to explain(especially how medicines actually work) and has been observed now by seperate top labs globally, the reason i mention this is because we are still in the dark ages of how our biology works and how perfectly in tune and resonating it is on all levels, quantum coherently singing a perfect song to allow a basically perfect enthalpic system to be. So how we think about ourselves is out of alignment with nature and the laws underpinning life and we have to realise quite how much power we can have to promote the health of our cells and that as the pilot you have to make that song as beautifully in tune as possible, go away from it and your life force diminishes..
Water is the most incredible substance everyone thinks they know and easily less than 1% of humans do. It's understanding would change the world over night and bring down the fascist cabals running our governments.
I'm guessing as well that since all the veggies nicely realkalise the body and promote a healthy gut fauna that that may be a big reason why it helps rebalance you. But the effort to look after yourself seems less and less worthwhile the worse you feel about yourself and it can spiral down within days.
It can seem like it is all about you and you are cursed but once you realise that you are not currently yourself at all and you have to battle back towards full health and then go beyond that to assure your stability things will get brighter and brighter and before you know it you are looking back on the whole thing thinking jeez i nearly let that diseased state take me out.
also you are mostly water and that water in your cells is aligned to a extremely high state of crystallised order, it is actually known as the fourth state of water and explains every problem that the current cell biology model fails to explain(especially how medicines actually work) and has been observed now by seperate top labs globally, the reason i mention this is because we are still in the dark ages of how our biology works and how perfectly in tune and resonating it is on all levels, quantum coherently singing a perfect song to allow a basically perfect enthalpic system to be. So how we think about ourselves is out of alignment with nature and the laws underpinning life and we have to realise quite how much power we can have to promote the health of our cells and that as the pilot you have to make that song as beautifully in tune as possible, go away from it and your life force diminishes..
Water is the most incredible substance everyone thinks they know and easily less than 1% of humans do. It's understanding would change the world over night and bring down the fascist cabals running our governments.
Captain Ginyu
Member
Relic, I just came across your thread and haven't had time to read half the posts, so if I mention something that's already been discussed, I appologize...Aside from looking into cannabis for your anxiety, can you tell me if you monitor your blood pressure readings, in addition to your pulse rate? If you do, what are the average readings? If you don't, then it's time you should!
I'm saying this because I have hypertension and I suffered from panic attacks in the past, and hypertension has a lot to do with panic disorders. In my experience, I cannot count how many times I have been in the ER due to chest pains. all of these, showed no results from a heart attack, even CT scans and stress tests came up negative. What it did reveal, was that my blood cholesterol was high, and that I was overweight. So, I changed my diet to mostly vegetarian, and I have shaved off some weight already, and am already improving in health. I won't say that I am cured, but my panic attacks are far less often now; but that's my situation, anyways.
Also, one thing is true about blood cholesterol leading to hypertension...you don't have to be overweight! In fact, smokers are much more prone to it, and a lot comes down to what people eat.
I'm saying this because I have hypertension and I suffered from panic attacks in the past, and hypertension has a lot to do with panic disorders. In my experience, I cannot count how many times I have been in the ER due to chest pains. all of these, showed no results from a heart attack, even CT scans and stress tests came up negative. What it did reveal, was that my blood cholesterol was high, and that I was overweight. So, I changed my diet to mostly vegetarian, and I have shaved off some weight already, and am already improving in health. I won't say that I am cured, but my panic attacks are far less often now; but that's my situation, anyways.
Also, one thing is true about blood cholesterol leading to hypertension...you don't have to be overweight! In fact, smokers are much more prone to it, and a lot comes down to what people eat.
well said Ginyu
And obviously it isn't all bad though cholesterol the healthier your system and diet the more likely you have high density lipoprotein in your blood which is a good cholesterol and less likely you have much low density lipoprotein. The good kind strips the bad away from arterial plaques and reduces the hypertension.
many smokers also smoke tobacco which along with poor diet speeds up very negative epigentic effects, turns off good genes and on bad ones.
And obviously it isn't all bad though cholesterol the healthier your system and diet the more likely you have high density lipoprotein in your blood which is a good cholesterol and less likely you have much low density lipoprotein. The good kind strips the bad away from arterial plaques and reduces the hypertension.
many smokers also smoke tobacco which along with poor diet speeds up very negative epigentic effects, turns off good genes and on bad ones.
B
BrnCow
One of my friends claims Zanax XR works for him while straight Zanax does...
Captain Ginyu
Member
Please keep in mind that Xanax, and other generic substitutes such as Lorazepam, are only a temporary fix. They should only be taken when absolutely necessary, and not for a period exceeding 30 days. Long term regular use can result in dementia and organ failure, not good!
Hats off and a very big salute to those of you who deal with such as this . My former wife was a member of this club and I so recall her struggles. She was an md who knew well the bs behind the meds. Please remember that there is no free ride with any substance - big pharma has no care for you - but they are like all corporations. junkies for money with no integrity - they will say or do anything for the money . In short , they are evil and will sell you absolute bunk that they know will harm you, with not one whit of remorse. Rather, they will like all evil bastards, just lawyer up .
