Girlfriend is demanding I open the locked door. What to say?

[]A[Boss]

you messed up letting her live with you. You can't even be yourself around this bird. And we aren't just talking growing. This is much bigger than the grow itself. You are one stupid pussy boy.

fuck with real women who got their own shit and ones who let you be yourself from the start. Quit being insecure and scared.

 

[]A[Boss]

now that's funny LOL . I didn't know phychosis had a color or gender preference ?? LOL peace out Headband707

HAHAH ya im just fuckin round lol.

 

[armedoldhippy]

gotta agree with the ones that said "anyone that claims to not hide anything is a liar". EVERYONE has secrets, some of us are just better at keeping them. if two people know something, it is no longer a secret... good luck!

 

[rick shaw]

Stick with the I'm broke so I need a roommate temporarily story. Tell her your roomy's name is Yummybud and he has been complaining about your noise.

 

[LadyCropSitter]

Tell her you just found out you have the herplee erplees and don't want to spread it she needs to go get tested right away. If she stays and say's she loves you anyways then you can trust her and just show her the room dude because she might very well be ride or die with ya.

What if she stays cuz she has her own case of herpes?

 

[thyme time]

distract her by saying you have a big surprise for her,stahl... till u can move your stuff......then carry on with the grow and give your relationship a chance... maybe a few months.....then you will know better if you can trust and tell her.

 

[Bong Rippington]

Is it too late to cast my vote?

Assuming you're truely willing to give it all up for this girl I reccomend a hybrid approach - My idea is that you invent a friend named Kevin. You explain the following to her:

You see, you're kind of embarrassed to admit this but you used to be kind of a pothead. You used to smoke weed right up until you started going out with her (TRUE). You can then explain to her that you are finishing up a grow with a friend of yours (named Kevin), and that is the last grow you'll be doing together (Mostly TRUE). You can tell her that you've wanted to tell her the whole time but you had to make sure you could trust her (TRUE). You tell her you're telling her now because you wanted to "clear the air" so you guys can move forward to the next phase of the relationship - whatever that may be.(TRUE)

You explain to her that you started the Grow with Kevin before you two were dating (Mostly TRUE), You explain to her that in a few weeks it will all be gone & done with (Kevin's going to take care of it). I really really cant see her holding it against her if you can calmly explain why its a security issue to tell people you're not 100% sure of. You can even say that you wanted to tell her weeks ago but that Kevin was against it - and you're telling her anyways because you feel a connection or whatever.

The key pieces of this plan are:

A: You're done with it - its resolving itself in a week or so (whenever harvest is)
B: You're wanting to be honest with her - but you also had to be sure she was trustworthy
C: You have to make sure you're still together/with her after you make your big reveal - If she freaks out on you after you give her this very reasonable explanation than ??? - Good Luck.

There is obviously some trust/risk involved in this approach but it would set you mostly square with your Girl and hopefully setup some honest dialogue about the *REAL* you - (i.e. "So you used to smoke? Why'd you quit?" - "So you used to like growing? How come you stopped?")

NOTE: This entire story works without "Kevin" - But in this situation I think it might be more socially acceptable for you not to have told her this long if you had other parties involved to consider.

 

[Mr. Bongjangles]

You must have missed all the "dump her", "get rid of her", "throw the bitch out", "throw it to her one more time and get rid of her" comments....... I think about 80 percent of the comments suggest this.....

Saying he should get rid of this particular nosy/straight edge chick isn't the same as saying he can't have a girlfriend, family or sex, which is how you summarized things.

Like said, that was a straw man argument, and you continue to rest your case on misinterpretations of the advice given.

I also fail to understand why you keep glossing over the fact that the girl is being exposed to felony-level risk behind her back. You don't do that to another person... You keep them away from that shizz till you know they are trustworthy enough to be around, then, if so, they can choose to accept the risk or not.

 

[Chomp]

OK speaking from the experience of having my growing held over my head by a woman....

If you want to stay with her then quit growing. If you want to keep growing then get rid of her and keep growing.

Either way you don't tell her a GD thing about what's behind those doors. You will end up regretting it if you do.

In this case honesty is not the best policy...you keep that shit a secret and bring it to the grave with you.

Chomp

 

[Chomp]

Here's a chicks perspective on the situation...1. You need to assess your relationship. Do you think this is going anywhere? It doesn't sound like it to me. You mentioned "sex", "friendship", and not trusting her yet. If you've been having sex and being friends for months and you can't trust her, that's a big red flag. If so, then you don't need to tell her anything,and you shouldn't. And you should wise up, great sex is not worth putting yourself at risk...you can get that anywhere.

2. If you do think you'd like to take it to the next level, then you need to tell her soon. The sooner the better. This way you can tell her the truth, that it's something you can't just tell anyone for obvious reasons. Tell her that you have really appreciated your time together and that you do trust her and want to let her into your life. Thank her for being so wonderful, and make her your girl officially. (yes I'm helping you not get punched in the face here) If she can't be cool with it, then she's not the girl for you. Growing is a life-style, and a passion, and you would be better off being with a girl you can be down with that, and won't make you feel like shit about it.

Everything about this post is WRONG WRONG WRONG!!!!

You don't say a word not a damn peep about you growing to this girl. Yeah in a perfect "flowers and butterflies" world you should be able to tell her and she either accepts it and stays with you forever or doesn't and you two split up and remain friends forever....

That shit is a fairy tale...keep your damn mouth shut

Chomp

 

[Chronic Don]

Yeah ive always told myself that i would keep her until it became a problem, but thats much easier said then done. Youre right though. She doesnt actually live here so she shouldnt be demanding anything. But we're getting serious and shes saying things like "i dont hide anything from you".

do you have abuddy you can get over to come out and lock the door behind him while shes there? they could say its just storage of his private stuff. if that doesnt stop her make sure to get rid of her, or change your lifestyle. if you dont smoke anymore why grow, go get a job be the hubby and not worry.

 

[Private Joker]

Chicks tell their friends everything, absolutely everything.

What will stop her from droping a dime on you when u break up?

My 2 pennies

 

[zen_trikester]

The biggest problem here is that she already knows something is up. She knows he is hiding something from her. I would personally prefer she knows about weed rather than jumping to conclusions like a meth lab or body part storage. I mean really... there are only so many things that one would hide from a GF in an obvious locked bedroom.

Of course the jackwaggon didn't actually hide anything. Just locking a bedroom door in the middle of the house isn't hiding shit. Who the fuck wouldn't want to know what was in there? Going to her now and saying it is someone else's shit and you don't have a key or having a roommate is a stupid lie. Why would he have not said that in the first place?

I understand the whole rule #1 thing, but he has already told her that he is doing something illegal in there by not letting her in. If he doesn't want to end this his only option is to shut it down. Of course when she sees an empty room after he cleaned the shit out she is still going to know he was lying. So if he wants to keep the girl he has to tell her. then after trust is established, or she is long gone from his life he can start up again.


Zack you totally fucked yourself. Worst thing is you started another thread before your first date with this girl and everyone told you not to do it then, but still you put yourself in this position.

 

[SCROG McDuck]

15 pages in 2 days... my man.. you hit the mother load..

Every one has an opinion.. cool..

some good , some bad...

and I've only read thru pge 3-4...

The guys who do not have girls, told them to go, and they did.
Hookers ARE cheaper....

The guys that told them, have to kiss ass, so as not to piss them off, for fear, they'll tell everyone...

But women talk. It's what they (mostly) do...
(I'm sorry ladies, but...)

The younger you are, them more you have to worry about...

Me... I'm old and married: as soon as I started the 1st grow,
she immediatly told her girlfriends.. I didnt 'specifically' say "do not tell anyone"... when I freaked, she shruged and said.. "What?!"

FWIW.. if you're married and she tells and you get busted, so does she. Unless you really piss her off and she tells LEO, directly.

Dont know what you should do but GL..

 

[headband 707]

OK speaking from the experience of having my growing held over my head by a woman....

If you want to stay with her then quit growing. If you want to keep growing then get rid of her and keep growing.

Either way you don't tell her a GD thing about what's behind those doors. You will end up regretting it if you do.

In this case honesty is not the best policy...you keep that shit a secret and bring it to the grave with you.

Chomp

WTF are women really that bad ? LOL You have to be a special type of asshole to actually call the cops on a person because you break up with them. If your finding chicks like that and staying with them ,then it's on you.. I would never start a relationship with a person that I couldn't be myself with !! Why the fuck would you even go down that road LOL.. This is the problem with ppl they don't ask enough questions to see what type of person they are sleeping with..Take your time and figure them out first peace out Headband707

Honesty is the best policy if you know who your being honest to.. lol

 

[DiscoBiscuit]

15 pages in 2 days... my man.. you hit the mother load..

Zack's gonna faint when he sees all this.

 

[ZZTops]

Zack has had this problem for some time...

https://www.icmag.com/ic/showthread.php?t=185043

 

[bicyclebenny]

I'd say IDK what's in those rooms, since I sub-lease the place from a guy who's in India most of the time, then watch pineapple express with her and ask if she knows where we can score some seeds. See where that leads.

 

[Guest3498]

"i dont hide anything from you".

Sounds like a stage 5 clinger... Abort!! Abort!!

In all seriousness, this sounds like a horrible situation. The easiest and smartest route is to dump her and move on. Next time handle it better. Expand the grow and get an apartment if you need to have women over so bad.

 

[DiscoBiscuit]

Speaking of girls being yappy, she's got at least a couple of girlfriends on the side wondering what's behind the door. As soon as your girl knows, they'll all know.