Oh my god! Toilet paper sucks so much

[Japanfreakier]

and even dryer sheets ...lol

So your ass smells linen fresh is what you're saying.

 

[Danks2005]

in a pinch ive used leaves, and even dryer sheets ...lol

and plenty of brown ppr twls...the key to comfort if u have to use the brown towels is to wad them up in your hand and unroll them first.....same wrks w/ newspaper too.

I also have used leaves and dryer vents. As well as ripping up my t-shirt, and donating my boxers, also with those browin paper towels(definately have to be crumpled, over and over again, till soft. Then wet em if you can). So you can see, when you gotta go, you gotta go. Butt I do my best to shit on home turf.

The best is when you're on a construction site, and your about to shit yourself. So you RUN to the neares porta-shitter. Open the door and it is slap full of maggots, they must have skipped over this on cleaning day. But, it's too late, you don't have time to go to another. So you get in there, try not to touch nothing, hover if you will, and do your thang. Then you reach for the TP and it's all soaked, and you don't know by what. Thats a true story, used my boxers on that one. Only good about a porta-shitter, is the writing on the walls. LOL

 

[mean mr.mustard]

sackO you have change the way I think about corn

Well he just ruined butter for me!

 

[RudolfTheRed]

what a wimp.

toilet paper is a luxury.

i remember when i used to travel a lot and hike and all the sudden you would be on the side of the road, or in the middle of the woods, dead of winter and have to take a shit when all the sudden you look around, and you have nothing to wipe with, with your pants down literally freezing your ass off. That is a predicament beyond running out of water, haha.

the only real thing that sucks about toilet paper is how god damn expensive it is for some paper. these days ill just wipe with the news paper if i have too. i shit maybe 1-2 times a day, and if for the 10 seconds i wipe my ass at the end doestn't feel soft and fluffy I don't care. Its 10 seconds, 20 if ya had diarrhea. I can handle the slight, little, if any discomfort experienced while wiping with a news paper, or if i feel like living like a rock star toilet paper.

 

[Japanfreakier]

lol, I just had a guy named Rudolf call me a wimp. Now that's funny.

Dude I'm totally a wimp, physically I'm not a small man, but I got baby skin and the only callous I got is from slapping my monkey.....a lot.......a real lot.

 

[feral]

same wrks w/ newspaper too.

hmmmm.......be nice to find some old issues with Bush's pic so I can wipe my ass.

 

[SmilinBob]

I also have used leaves and dryer vents.

Holy cow

Did you bring the vent with you from the dryer, or did you waddle back to the laundry room?

 

[rocky5]

when in the army your out in the field for upto months so you just use whatever
a few snobs carry a bog roll though.
thats why soldiers got hairy arses, to catch the run off,he,he.
nothing like the pain of ripping a few dangleberrys off,its much harder than nose hairs.

 

[Green lung]

Free napkins from burger king

 

[Cookie monster]

The vikings used moss and the romans used a sponge on a stick.

I dont even want to think what the eskimo's used

 

[Kalicokitty]

I dont even want to think what the eskimo's used

Baby harp seals

 

[mean mr.mustard]

Oh man that would feel AWESOME! *Peter Griffin voice*

 

[swampbuggy]

Just use smooth stones like the Afghan recruits, and don't forget to flush them!

http://www.propublica.org/article/s...r-the-afghan-national-police-cant-begin-to-do