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Why I will no longer loan anything to anyone, or do favors for people ever again....

NOKUY

Active member
Veteran
Tools, vehicles, computers - never had a problem, always comes back in better shape than I lent it out at. :dunno:

how do u get tools and vehicles back from loaners in better shape than they left....that makes no sense????

did they get loaned to west coast customs???
 
T

tuinman

how do u get tools and vehicles back from loaners in better shape than they left....that makes no sense????

did they get loaned to west coast customs???

I lend out something dirty, it'll come back clean. Or loan out my vehicle, it comes back with more gas than it had. I'm not saying someone went and mega-pimped it out, they just took the time to show a bit of appreciation. I do the same when borrowing from others.
 

Protea

Member
this summer we had wisitors that borrowed our car, and left it so that it needed to be filled up at once. they did it twice, if ever they borrow the car again, i guess i will tell them to fill it up when they are done. its the fucking bare minimume they can do. i mean i invited them into my home, told them to help themself to booze or MJ, all on me. then they leav two drops of gas in the tank. dickheads.
 

headband 707

Plant whisperer
Veteran
I understand what your saying Headband, but it is not really about wanting to or not wanting to loan you stuff out, it is about people not being respectful of other peoples time, money, and property...

More often than not I have just found that those on the receiving end of being helped could give two shits about your time, money and property. These people Im talking about are not helpless and destitute, they are more than capable of either taking care of the things loaned to them, or helping my out with something in exchange for my time/money. The problem is they chose not to....

I guess that is really that what you expect and who you help in the end. Not all ppl are like you and not all ppl think like you. If your giving your help it should be giving freely with no strings attached if you want anything attached you need to say what you want attached to change the game. If I can't do what I said I let ppl know and never borrow ppl's shit just incase I break it I need to pay for it. I think ppl look at ppl that have and think well they have it I don't it's all good. This is not a new concept and if I was poor or down and out I know I would have a hard time aswell . Material things are just that but friendships and what we learn from them last a lifetime... I can always buy another tool but I cannot buy another friend even with all their faults most mean well.. peace out Headband707:)
 
Great thread......

Here is my story, that happened last week....a friend of mine who I have know for about 8 years...our kids grew up together playing softball...we coached them together...have a monthly poker game with friends....asks me if I will give him a hand....we both have 5th wheel trailers....and his truck is in the shop....he lent his 36' 5th wheel to his son for a very large grow way up in the mountains....would I help him get the trailor.....Now.....this guy is a friend.....and of course I said sure.....where is it??? well he said about 1 hour away......I.....said.....sure.....well this place was quite abit farther away...and 10 miles back on a very narrow....washed out gravel road....I was doing this because we have a good friendship....not for any other reason......well we get there.....and the trailor was moved in real tight to a hill......it was super hard to get hooked up....and very tight...
but after about an hour....we got it hooked up....his son is there with his partner....and there was some of the crop still to be cut...they have some amazing cuts...and stuff I have never seen before.....just awesome....these guys were very good at growing....
so anyway....we get on the road....takes a couple of hours to get out of there....and in total....more than half a day in total.....my buddies son....come up and gives me a C note for gas....and his partner....says.....thanks you really helped us out.....and I say......say thanks to your dad....as he is my friend.....I am helping him out.....but I say.....if your really want to take care of me....I have an idea......they kinda smile.....and say ok.....I hand them back the C note....and said get me a cut of each of those 2 strains.....I have never seen anything like that before......of course I was sworn to secreaty...and had to promise to never....EVER......give them out.....I looked at them and said.....guys....that is not how I roll.........I never give out cuts I receive to anyone.....EVER.....it comes down to ethics.....You dad know that......my friend the dad.....says .....boys.....this guy is a man of his word......

It made me feel good......

Still have not received the cuts.......and maybe never will......but I still feel good.....helping a friend.
 

FullyMeltedDome

Active member
Veteran
Wow, you need to have that tattoo that says "sucker" removed from your forehead.
:moon:I dont think helping someone out makes him a sucker.I mean,some people go through there whole life not willing to help anyone or looking at everyone like there bums that are only trying to get over.Thats no way to live,and an ugly way to look at people.I will loan to some,but theres others that just plain straight out will take advantage.But you cant Judge everyone by the actions of a few.And i dont think helping someone makes anyone a sucker.To me, it makes them caring for giving another the benifit of the doubt and trying to help.Yeah,we live and learn,but going through life not trusting anyone is no way to live in my opinion.Ill help people stil,even though i got burned by some.Everyone i know is not like that,but there is always those few that make people not want to help anyone after that,but i wont let the actions of a few affect the rest.IMO,thread starter is not a sucker is my point of post!.Peace and Stay Safe,DancesWithWeed:wave:
 

Desiderata

Bodhisattva of the Earth
Veteran
When you give or loan to someone you are giving a piece of your heart too. Alot of folks don't know that. You give the way you want to be treated back. It would piss me off when I would loan this dike my shovels and they would come back caked with red dirt. I let her know, and one day she gave me her used lawnmower which I still have.

Some things you don't front out like your camera or money. Shit always happens, it's wierd......
 

NOKUY

Active member
Veteran
Great thread......

Here is my story, that happened last week....a friend of mine who I have know for about 8 years...our kids grew up together playing softball...we coached them together...have a monthly poker game with friends....asks me if I will give him a hand....we both have 5th wheel trailers....and his truck is in the shop....he lent his 36' 5th wheel to his son for a very large grow way up in the mountains....would I help him get the trailor.....Now.....this guy is a friend.....and of course I said sure.....where is it??? well he said about 1 hour away......I.....said.....sure.....well this place was quite abit farther away...and 10 miles back on a very narrow....washed out gravel road....I was doing this because we have a good friendship....not for any other reason......well we get there.....and the trailor was moved in real tight to a hill......it was super hard to get hooked up....and very tight...
but after about an hour....we got it hooked up....his son is there with his partner....and there was some of the crop still to be cut...they have some amazing cuts...and stuff I have never seen before.....just awesome....these guys were very good at growing....
so anyway....we get on the road....takes a couple of hours to get out of there....and in total....more than half a day in total.....my buddies son....come up and gives me a C note for gas....and his partner....says.....thanks you really helped us out.....and I say......say thanks to your dad....as he is my friend.....I am helping him out.....but I say.....if your really want to take care of me....I have an idea......they kinda smile.....and say ok.....I hand them back the C note....and said get me a cut of each of those 2 strains.....I have never seen anything like that before......of course I was sworn to secreaty...and had to promise to never....EVER......give them out.....I looked at them and said.....guys....that is not how I roll.........I never give out cuts I receive to anyone.....EVER.....it comes down to ethics.....You dad know that......my friend the dad.....says .....boys.....this guy is a man of his word......

It made me feel good......

Still have not received the cuts.......and maybe never will......but I still feel good.....helping a friend.

nice u were able to help out....but why can't u get cuts...that's easy peazy...even off of plants in flower.

strange story
 
Nokuy

Nokuy

I asked...they said no.....In my experience....once that happens....never push.....these cuts were very special....and I knew that.

Really it does not matter....I was helping a friend.

nice u were able to help out....but why can't u get cuts...that's easy peazy...even off of plants in flower.

strange story
 

BagseedSamurai

Active member
Cry me a river. Yeah, people can be shitheads but letting "life-happens" type of stuff ruin you or your urge to help anyone do anything for the rest of your life then go cry somewhere else. The world is full of people like that. We don't need another one adding their own not-so-unique voice to the cacophony. What we could use more of is people who have had worse happen than your petty crap and still have the courage to help, to lend and to give.
 

Yes4Prop215

Active member
Veteran
same way with my younger brother...he has zero ambition and basically freeloads of me and my parents. he always asks to borrow money to fix his car and other stupid shit, and hes my brother so i always do it....he NEVER pays it back, always has to work it off through trimming and chores, then he complains and does a shitty job when hes working off debt lol. i let him borrow my car and he always returns it empty "oop sorry i forgot, il wash your dishes and clean your house" blah blah...

either way, the only reason i put up with that shit is because hes my only brother....if he was a friend he would have been gone a long time ago..
 

woolybear

Well-known member
Veteran
same way with my younger brother...he has zero ambition and basically freeloads of me and my parents. he always asks to borrow money to fix his car and other stupid shit, and hes my brother so i always do it....he NEVER pays it back, always has to work it off through trimming and chores, then he complains and does a shitty job when hes working off debt lol. i let him borrow my car and he always returns it empty "oop sorry i forgot, il wash your dishes and clean your house" blah blah...

either way, the only reason i put up with that shit is because hes my only brother....if he was a friend he would have been gone a long time ago..

Love ya prop, in this case I would tell your bro to fuck off once in a while. Yeah he's your brother but he's also a human being that u have to judge on those merits.

Its not like he can stop being your brother. I may be high/drunk at the moment but it sounds like your bro is a bit of an asshole and its your place as senior Bro to put him in his place and tell him to fuck off.

Stop giving the fucker money, how's he going to live on his own otherwise? Puffin some GDP x SSDH CSG genetics
 
Speaking from experience...

Speaking from experience...

same way with my younger brother...he has zero ambition and basically freeloads of me and my parents. he always asks to borrow money to fix his car and other stupid shit, and hes my brother so i always do it....he NEVER pays it back, always has to work it off through trimming and chores, then he complains and does a shitty job when hes working off debt lol. i let him borrow my car and he always returns it empty "oop sorry i forgot, il wash your dishes and clean your house" blah blah...

either way, the only reason i put up with that shit is because hes my only brother....if he was a friend he would have been gone a long time ago..

Prop,

I just got out of a same but different experience as you. Details don't matter except it was a family member as close to me as your brother is to you. So I will give you some heartfelt advice. No offense meant.

This person is always a never ending black hole of need. I would try to be there for them. Cash, food, transportation (which also meant having to take time off from work, unpaid).

My payback was being robbed blind of everything I had of value. Antique jewelry worth $1000's, coin collection worth $1,000's, etc. etc. tip of the iceberg etc.

"People Like That" my elderly father told me, don't want to change. "When they look at you, they don't see you as the one who helps them, they see you as someone who has what they want, and they think you owe it to them."

The best thing I did was to cut them off and cut off communication.

just my $0.02 with respect.
 

RP2012

New member
wow, how ironic. i saw this thread and it really does apply to something going down right now for me as well...

i've always been the "give people a chance" guy, you know, always lending a hand, letting people borrow stuff. as i got older i quickly realized (as many have said already) the majority of people have no respect for things that are not theirs, and rarely have any concept of respect or timeliness.

i used to front my buddy all the time when he had a job, and he would literally pay me back within the week. well i had a bigger harvest come thru and he wanted some to get rid of himself - so i fronted him, not even thinking. dude has been on unemployment for over a year and a half. he claims he is putting in "10 applications a day" and just can't get hired. he has a decent background but i think he's bullshitting. anyway, he still had income when i fronted him, and this was late August. he has 'tried' to pay me back in small increments, 100 there, 50 there...when he owed me $800...as of 11/12, dude still owes me $150. it has taken him close to 3 months and he has yet to pay back the full debt. he keeps making excuses, he had to pay his car bill, doesnt have gas, etc. meanwhile, i see on his facebook he's going out with friends, has gas to drive where they're going, etc. he's duckin' me.

i still consider him a friend, but i won't ever front him for more than a week, tops. and even then, he's not getting more than an ounce at a time. these types of people cannot be changed, no matter how many times you beat their ear. the kicker to all this is because he's so broke he lives with his mom (he just turned 30) and his mom makes serious dough @ a hospital...i would think it would be better to owe family, than a friend. why not bum the money from your mom to pay back a friend you've owed for more than 3 months? at any rate, sad these types of people cause generous people to do a 360 and not be so generous towards anyone, all because of the bad taste.
 
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