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Terrible numbing fear.

Floridian

Active member
Veteran
I started growing in this small house back in 2002 when I became convinced that clones were in fact real lolThere have been times during the 15 years that I could have used a sedative right to the jugular.And the dreams man they can just be so frickin bad..yea unwanted mansex dreams at times.My entire next day would be ruined just from whatever happened in my brain.I love to grow.I also take care of my 85 year old mom that lives two miles away.She's a hip old lady.The thought of something happening where we become separated because I just had to grow this shit..well man everythings nutty.I keep under 25 plants kinda smart down here.How about this anyone ever destroy their plants just because their head was about to explode in fear?I'm proud to say this has only happened 3 or 4 times in the 15 years.It almost happened over the weekend but I saned myself real quick lol.Anyone else ever destroy plants when nothing bad was imminent?Sorry I talks to much may none of us ever hear the clank.
 

MrBungle

Active member
I once took shrooms by myself at home and killed everything including my all time fav strain Confidential Cheese (the one that got away)
 

who dat is

Cave Dweller
Veteran
Back when I was in NC I chopped my 5 or 6 plants that I had going because I saw a State Trooper drive by on our quiet road where there was only one more house past ours and I thought my landlord was onto me. Nothing came of it though. I don't miss that feeling of worry, sorry you still have to deal with it. :comfort:
 

Green Squall

Well-known member
I got a call from the local PD on my answering machine asking for me to call back. I had the stinkiest plants going at the time so I was already a little nervous.

Turned out it was about my grandmother wandering away from the house. They couldn't reach my other family and I guess I was the last emergency contact.
 

CosmicGiggle

Well-known member
Moderator
Veteran
I hear you Floridian, I recently destroyed my newest grow not because of the 'Terrible numbing fear' but a near constant low-level feeling of dread and impending doom.:hide:

My problem is my 75yr. old neighbor down the street; we have a good relationship but he's an ex cop with a couple of rescued drug dogs that he makes some money off of by hiring out to sniff out drugs in schools and factories in the area.

He walks these dogs all over the place and I've often wondered...:drum:

..... anyhow, shortly after I ditched the grow I ran into his wife while she was walking her dogs and she happened to tell me about 2 recent indoor grow-op busts at the opposite ends of her street.

.......... right before this I had seen a suspected undercover black SUV drive down the dead end lane separating our streets.

This is a small semi-rural neighborhood and no one looks poor or 'drugie' but I guess one can never be too careful.:violin:
 

dank.frank

ef.yu.se.ka.e.em
ICMag Donor
Veteran
I don't think you understand his post. You often make responses that seem way off the beaten trail of what was actually said....

Not trying to be rude, but maybe you just have comprehension issues?

That aside - it's not paranoia if someone is really out to get you. Millions and millions of dollars are used just for that purpose. A healthy dose of true gut wrenching FEAR stuck in your throat is unfortunately all too common. However, I think it is essential to "survival". The reverse end of that is to become complacent and you start thinking your invincible and untouchable. That's more dangerous than walking around with a tin foil hat in my opinion.

I NEVER ignore that still small voice. If I can't shake a notion and I know there is no logical basis for feeling that way, yet it's still eating at me. I LISTEN. I ACT ON IT.

Risk vs Reward - know when to pull the plug. Live to see another day. Prison sucks.



dank.Frank
 

Genghis Kush

Active member
Follow your dreams and always trust your gut instinct .
________
And of course,

“An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”


― Benjamin Franklin
 

Vanilla Phoenix

Super Lurker
ICMag Donor
I used to get paranoid. Especially the first 5 years. Never went ballistic and trashed plants though. Nowadays the paranoia rarely comes and it's gone as quick as it came. Not sayin I'm not cautious. What kinda sux is my grow is at another location and I'm only there a couple hours a day. So I mainly worry about fires, break ins, ect....

Now I'm getting myself paranoid!!! :bashhead:
 

igrowone

Well-known member
Veteran
i'd call it the grower's equivalent to shell shock
you know there's danger, maybe not imminent, but real danger
give it enough time and the mind begins to go to dark places
change of some sort is needed
 

Floridian

Active member
Veteran
Yes CG I could grow less but considering under 25 makes prison very unlikely and jail pretty unlikely too.Its the money.25 or more plants well,I don't have that scratch.But to explain before we fall asleep,I do a perpetual grow,12 in flower and 12 in veg at all times.But how can you keep it down below 25 when you have to take clones to keep it going?That my friend I'll leave you to answer.Remember 12 mature flowering plants and 12 mature vegged plant.Your time starts...now dedadeddedade,dedadedadadededededededadedededade,dadadadadedede EDIT CG I flower 4 large plants under each vertizontal using 3 fixtures(open 4ft octagonal) hoods.Comes out to 12 large ladies
 
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coldcanna

Active member
Veteran
I used to worry like that before I became medical, to this day anytime a helicopter flies by I run to the windows and can't relax until it's out of earshot.

Honestly though fear is natural and healthy. The guys that have "no fear" get sloppy and talk or have lapses in security measures, those are the dopes that get busted.
 

aridbud

automeister
ICMag Donor
Veteran
NEVER ignore that still small voice. If I can't shake a notion and I know there is no logical basis for feeling that way, yet it's still eating at me. I LISTEN. I ACT ON IT.

Risk vs Reward - know when to pull the plug. Live to see another day.


Yep....best to pull the plug (indoors or outside) if your gut instincts say so.
 

Floridian

Active member
Veteran
Well I won this round.Its true its best to listen to that little voice but damn just killing all those females just seems criminal.O wait,it is criminal lol.Although I've only killed the clones twice in 15 years,I was feeling really antsy but I just said fuck it and continued on with business.God I get freaked sometimes though,mostly because I look after my elderly mamasita and if something happened she doesn't have anyone to take care of her like her favorite son.Did I mention I'm a mama's boy?
 

Floridian

Active member
Veteran
bozo if you haven't done any time for pot(or in your case you just may enjoy it).I don't need a second go around.As for Andio I know many women smarter than him,could outgrow the fuck out of him,and probably kick his ass with little effort
 

justanotherbozo

Active member
Veteran
bozo if you haven't done any time for pot(or in your case you just may enjoy it).I don't need a second go around.As for Andio I know many women smarter than him,could outgrow the fuck out of him,and probably kick his ass with little effort

...is this some kind of insult? ...because i told the guy that said you sounded like a woman an asshole?


picture.php


bozo
 

Floridian

Active member
Veteran
No man zero insults from this end merely speculation and observation.You see I am one of those female growers
 
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