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Severe Depression

DarthFader1

Member
Veteran
^^^ Oh wowow DAT your've really gone all out there on the halloween theme!! It's a little weird LOL but i can dig it! That is actually quite amazing

harvest on
darth
 

Ph-patrol

Well-known member
Veteran
Dat cool tent. Happy Halloween. Now the girl is cute but I like them a bit older and I like them on the chubby side.:biggrin:


Darth Went with sword fish tonight and yes your on the money with the farmed raised. I have bin eating banana and walnuts drizzled with hot almond butter and a little local honey.
 

DarthFader1

Member
Veteran
Dat cool tent. Happy Halloween. Now the girl is cute but I like them a bit older and I like them on the chubby side.:biggrin:


Darth Went with sword fish tonight and yes your on the money with the farmed raised. I have bin eating banana and walnuts drizzled with hot almond butter and a little local honey.

Oh dang that banana & walnuts with almond butter & honey sounds amazing! Yeah you can still have a gourmet sweet fix without it having to be really bad for you aye. Sure that dish would have alot of calories, but still be prittay good for you overall. Banana's truly are a superfood and you can have them so many different ways.
 

Borderliner

Active member
Walnuts sound good so picked up some waldorf salad from the deli yesterday and very tasty.

Darth reread your post again and I feel for you trying to block out pain from this planet as you say. That was my approach when I was younger was to stay stoned out of my mind every day. Which is neither good or bad in itself. Just put off dealing with stuff that was inside me. It was a way to cope and get by.

Look forward to more gourmet ideals.
b
 

DarthFader1

Member
Veteran
Walnuts sound good so picked up some waldorf salad from the deli yesterday and very tasty.

Darth reread your post again and I feel for you trying to block out pain from this planet as you say. That was my approach when I was younger was to stay stoned out of my mind every day. Which is neither good or bad in itself. Just put off dealing with stuff that was inside me. It was a way to cope and get by.

Look forward to more gourmet ideals.
b

Yeah man, it's my only coping mechanism really is to block most of it out. Otherwise i feel too much emotion it's just too painful. Example, i basically cannot watch anything on tv involving animal cruelty as it deeply disturbs and upsets me. I saw this f****** ad on tv for a documentary about these savage asians that keep dogs in a cage and eat them. Even just seeing that f****** image and it gets stuck in my mind forever.

Heaps of other stuff like that, too much suffering on this wretched planet, man im getting depressed just considering it.

But, there's also a truckload of awesomeness and beauty in this world as well, that's where i always try to be.

And yeah, the weed helps alot, but i agree with you when you say it is neither good nor bad. It just is what it is. I find as i get older i am beginning to smoke less which is good. Im mid 30s

thanks for caring bro
darth
 

DarthFader1

Member
Veteran
Another thing that deeply upset me was when that whore corporation BP had that giganormous oil spill in the gulf of Mexico, and basically murdered an ENTIRE ecosystem of complex species. If i could burn all those corporates to the ground i would in a heartbeat.

Even a few years on from that and that still really upsets me to think about, and there are hundreds of smaller oil spills every year. And im not even American nor do i even live within 5000miles of the gulf of Mexico. It just sux, but i drive a car as well so im just contributing to the planets demise pretty much.
 
S

SPG.

:D "So COOOOL DAT!!! "Gonna say YA Put the make up on a bit HEAVY!-Bahah!,Np lol
Gsc girl "needs a Make over.."


Evil dead woman near the plants Yea??^^^ :biglaugh : "esmmerelda lol" Was that once a Fruit Seller btw..?

Nc1 Honey..Festivities..Halloween's GR8 for the Kids..

(..."little faces" Runnin'around "lighting up" with excitement-anticipation,etc!.... :) )

Mongy weed ive got sent me too sleep!.. LOL... :nono: :rolleyes: [no smile...]

Too "Mongy"... :( lol
 

LEF

Active member
Veteran
lol @ Halloween grow room

next year I am dressing up

some people at work we're expecting me to dressup, to get into that spirit
I felt bad about it

next year, I am doing it

people we're trick or treating at 5pm here.. and at 8pm, there was no-one left on the streets (almost)
there was this family of 3 people, 2 women and 1 child I think

they we're dressed in garbage bags...

I was a little mad at them because it was so dark, and their costume didn't help
 
S

SPG.

Garbage bags! LOL :D ..Now that could be REAL Spookey!
Michael Myers Stuff!...

My Current Place ive been at 5 years last month [oct 9th] and Even though its a built up (Pleasant) area with lots of kids
/Families around
the Majority Owning their House/property too NOBODYS Ever been around Trick or Treatin'..
My Last Place where Everybodys got no money and are on Benefits/welfare..Housing benefit etc etc AND LOTSSSS TURN UP wanting stuff !!!!
Typical Ayh! [sod's law..] :nono: ..LOL
 
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Borderliner

Active member
Yeah man, it's my only coping mechanism really is to block most of it out. Otherwise i feel too much emotion it's just too painful. Example, i basically cannot watch anything on tv involving animal cruelty as it deeply disturbs and upsets me. I saw this f****** ad on tv for a documentary about these savage asians that keep dogs in a cage and eat them. Even just seeing that f****** image and it gets stuck in my mind forever.

Heaps of other stuff like that, too much suffering on this wretched planet, man im getting depressed just considering it.

But, there's also a truckload of awesomeness and beauty in this world as well, that's where i always try to be.

And yeah, the weed helps alot, but i agree with you when you say it is neither good nor bad. It just is what it is. I find as i get older i am beginning to smoke less which is good. Im mid 30s

thanks for caring bro
darth

Darth

Thank you for your sincerity. Btw we share the same MBTI INTJ.

My best man at my wedding wrote his thesis on MBTI and I had a prior interest myself so at one time had a fair working knowledge. So I do understand about feeling too much emotion. We are not clones but how we perceive and process information and try to make sense of the world is going to be close. For me, all that feeling too much I like to think of as me being over sensitive. After all, our main tool in this world is intuition.

Now I'm in my 60's and divorced and it's really easy for me to look at my x or any other issue that is emotionally charged and stay focused on that. The truth of the matter is with any interpersonal dispute both folks contribute to the problem. It takes two to fight. Since I can't change others, it's damn painful trying to really only have the ability to change myself. I can't cut off feelings but can make sure that does not interfere with my work play or love.

If someone can work play and love then they are in a pretty healthy place.

Like the idea of a truckload of awesomeness and beauty in this world. Your are correct and if I'm not seeing it at any given moment then for me the problem is within me. My over sensitivity might be stuck on some negativity and I just need to move on to something else. Which can be a hell of a lot easier to say than do at times. Reaching a goal or state in life is not as important as the journey. How we treat others how much we are concerned for others well being how much we love others this I think is most important in life.
b
 

Borderliner

Active member
Another thing that deeply upset me was when that whore corporation BP had that giganormous oil spill in the gulf of Mexico, and basically murdered an ENTIRE ecosystem of complex species. If i could burn all those corporates to the ground i would in a heartbeat.

Even a few years on from that and that still really upsets me to think about, and there are hundreds of smaller oil spills every year. And im not even American nor do i even live within 5000miles of the gulf of Mexico. It just sux, but i drive a car as well so im just contributing to the planets demise pretty much.

Darth

I worked the Exxon Valdez spill in Prince William Sound. Seen hundreds of oil soaked birds and mammals. Seen oil covered beaches where man had not walked the ground for hundreds of years. Very pristine land. Amid all of that was able to see some of the beauty and wonder of that area. It can be upsetting even madding so I did what could to help spending about 3 months out there setting up walk in clinics for injured workers. One of the best times in my life.
b
 

Ph-patrol

Well-known member
Veteran
I have some people very close to me that were involved with the Valdez oil spill. They organized clean up operations and Animal recovery. Recently was speaking with one of them about the otters being the cutest things they have ever seen . So yes they speak very fondly of there experiences .

Good for you Borderline
 

Borderliner

Active member
I have some people very close to me that were involved with the Valdez oil spill. They organized clean up operations and Animal recovery. Recently was speaking with one of them about the otters being the cutest things they have ever seen . So yes they speak very fondly of there experiences .

Good for you Borderline

Ph-patrol

It was a once in a life time experience. Wake up in the morning and watch the whales migrate. Boat up close to them was a blast. Those otters the seals are very endearing until you try to pick one up then it's like holding a buzz saw that works it way up one arm and down the other. There were teams assigned to wild life rescue and those not on the team usually only laid hands once on those critters.

Archeologists were assigned to work areas to find old sites and then take extra measures to save them from the usual clean up methods. If had a scanner would post some pics that are truly beautiful.
b
 

relic1981

Active member
Veteran
I have some people very close to me that were involved with the Valdez oil spill. They organized clean up operations and Animal recovery. Recently was speaking with one of them about the otters being the cutest things they have ever seen . So yes they speak very fondly of there experiences .

Good for you Borderline

right on. its great that you guys saw through the muck and oil and appreciated the natural beauty of the area. thanks to all who helped clean up that spill, helped animal and those who helped in anyway. its ironic, seems like whenever a big disaster happens people all unite for the common goal and forget about their differences or at least put them aside and work together. its a shame it takes such trajedy to get people thinking "right" but its great that they do. i just wish we could cooperate with eachother all the time instead of the rat race.
 

DarthFader1

Member
Veteran
You guys are truly heroes for helping in anyway possible with that oil spill. Right on about humans team coming together in situations like that. If i was there i so would have helped in a heatbeat.

Just awesome to hear and i am amazed that ppl here have been involved so closely in that Exxon tragedy

darth
 

Borderliner

Active member
During the clean up effort at PWS jokes were often heard how we owed our "vacation" to Capt. Joe who was drunk at the time and who wreaked the tanker spilling the oil.

Now I don't know if Capt. Joe has been cleared in the court of public opinion but he should be. From wikipedia: "Joseph Jeffrey Hazelwood was accused of being intoxicated which contributed to the disaster... but was cleared of this charge at his 1990 trial after witnesses testified that he was sober around the time of the accident."

There has been much talk how Exxon Corp. was fully to blame because of.... This is what I know is true and fyi I only worked for Veco which hired for Exxon most of the clean up crew. Toward the end of the season when I was released by Veco I contracted with Seattle Shipbuilders who was running a floating dry dock there and was with the last crew to leave before weather closed PWS. Exxon threw any amount of money for any notion that was thought to help during the clean up. Exxon did not shirk then.

The usual way of traveling for the clean up workers was by tug boat back and forth to the work sites. But medical could call a helo, if needed, anytime to transport a patient. There was no budget for medical including equipment for the make shift clinics. Hired archeologists to identify and ensure minimal impact of clean up efforts at cultural valued sites like graves and made cash reparations to local fisherman whose income was impacted by the spill. Efforts to save sensitive areas were begun early in the cleanup. Sensitive environments were identified, defined according to degree of cleanup, and then ranked for their priority for cleanup. Seal pupping locations and fish hatcheries were given the highest importance, and for these areas special cleaning techniques were approved. Don't get me wrong here I'm not trying to white wash Exxon but to present just the facts as I know them.

The spill was a disaster, Exxon paid the highest fine to that date of one billion. As a result of that spill Coast Guard procedures changed and so did the oil industry way of doing business.
b
 

med_breeder

Active member
Going through an intense depressive episode right now. I wanted to bump this. No medicine for the near future. Just riding it out. Just want to encourage others who may be going through depression right now. You are not alone. It blows, but we all will get through it.


Just make it one more minute.
 
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