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Looking for opinion on long distance relationship

Igignokt

Member
I'm not a woman, but I do prefer to ask women about relationship advice because I think women think relationships through more than guys.

Anyways, I just have somethin that's been on my mind. I met my gf in a 6 week program (not treatment--a field course for school). We talked here and there, I thought she was cute and was interested in her from the start, but our plans to go for hikes together and whatnot never came to be until the very last week. However, I had talked to her previously and taken the time to get to know her, and needless to say, I didn't need to do any persuasion for her to like me by that 6th week apparently.

So the last week together was great. We were really busy with the workload we had to do, but we had lots of sex and walks in the little time we could before the course was over. Then it came time to disband, but we stayed in contact. She's come to visit me in my city since then. She now lives 1,500 miles away in grad school, and we have a long distance relationship going. All is good

...except...
for my pissed off cousin who says our relationship is doomed because it's long distance, and that we had sex too early, and we're blinded, blah blah blah. She's been trying to plant seeds of doubt in our relationship garden, and it's frustrating. My gf and I are very happy now, and I'm thinking I might move to CA after I graduate this year to kick it with her for a bit until it snows and I probably move to mountains.

My cousin claims to know me better than anyone because we've been close and known eachother for, a lot, of years. Do you think being a long distance relationship when you only "dated" or whatever for a week prior is a bad idea? Maybe we had sex too soon? Not gonna lie, we compliment eachother really well in bed, but I also like her for her quietness (last gf was loud and annoying), care (but not obsession) about her self image, and outgoing-ness.

So, your thoughts. Sound like it would be a terrible idea to keep this relationship going, possibly moving out to CA next fall?

or is my cousin just pissed off because she hasn't had a BF in two years and the guy:girl ratio at this program was 3:1 and she still drummed up no interest


thanks ladies (or guys reading), for reading.

and for your opinions
 

Mrs.Babba

THE CHIMNEY!!
ICMag Donor
Veteran
Sounds like you got along real good, nothing wrong with seeing how things turn out, with all the technology these days its pretty easy to stay in touch. And its only temporary it sounds like, you guys can be together soon? sometimes things happen fast, doesnt mean its a bad thing, it is what it is. Keep talking and see if the feelings stay, nothing says you cant have a future with the lady :)
 
I am a dude, but I got lost on the message board

Well get it while the getting is good. No harm in trying to make it work. I have been out of the country most of the time over the past few years.....distance just doesn't work in most cases....just remember your only getting to see her part time=part time headaches. Ok that came out wrong. You don't get to see all the little things that erk you. I had a long distance relationship and when I moved back we both just decided we pissed each other off way too much and parted ways. I wouldn't really be thinking about moving to CA as fast as you. Slow down cowboy, just focus on visiting OFTEN for now.
 

hippie_lettuce

Garden Nymph
Veteran
You know what I want to do when people say I can't do something? I really wanna make it work, and usually, I do :D That's also what my mindset about long distance relationships is. If you really care for that person, then why care about what others have to say about your relationship? As long as you're happy, there's no point in doubting what you're doing. Happiness is a choice, in many cases. Good luck man.
 

statusquo

Member
You could certainly be blinded....that being said I think its a great idea. You will need to save up to move to Cali, alot! You can use the time that it takes to save up to really consider the move :) You only live once man. The more I think about that the more I get it.
 

johnnyla

Active member
Veteran
I'm not a woman, but I do prefer to ask women about relationship advice because I think women think relationships through more than guys.

Anyways, I just have somethin that's been on my mind. I met my gf in a 6 week program (not treatment--a field course for school). We talked here and there, I thought she was cute and was interested in her from the start, but our plans to go for hikes together and whatnot never came to be until the very last week. However, I had talked to her previously and taken the time to get to know her, and needless to say, I didn't need to do any persuasion for her to like me by that 6th week apparently.

So the last week together was great. We were really busy with the workload we had to do, but we had lots of sex and walks in the little time we could before the course was over. Then it came time to disband, but we stayed in contact. She's come to visit me in my city since then. She now lives 1,500 miles away in grad school, and we have a long distance relationship going. All is good

...except...
for my pissed off cousin who says our relationship is doomed because it's long distance, and that we had sex too early, and we're blinded, blah blah blah. She's been trying to plant seeds of doubt in our relationship garden, and it's frustrating. My gf and I are very happy now, and I'm thinking I might move to CA after I graduate this year to kick it with her for a bit until it snows and I probably move to mountains.

My cousin claims to know me better than anyone because we've been close and known eachother for, a lot, of years. Do you think being a long distance relationship when you only "dated" or whatever for a week prior is a bad idea? Maybe we had sex too soon? Not gonna lie, we compliment eachother really well in bed, but I also like her for her quietness (last gf was loud and annoying), care (but not obsession) about her self image, and outgoing-ness.

So, your thoughts. Sound like it would be a terrible idea to keep this relationship going, possibly moving out to CA next fall?

or is my cousin just pissed off because she hasn't had a BF in two years and the guy:girl ratio at this program was 3:1 and she still drummed up no interest


thanks ladies (or guys reading), for reading.

and for your opinions

you knew her for a week, and now you are long distance?

hmmmmn. it's kind of like this...

you may really like a place when you visit there on vacation, but that isn't the same as living there. unless she complements you more than sexually, as in same life goals, moving in the same direction, compatible spiritual beliefs etc i would see it for what it is, a good time once in awhile. DEFINATELY DO NOT deprive yourself. don't you think she is banging dudes at grad school? who was she banging the first 5 weeks of that program?
 

daydreamer

Member
stay in touch with your gf, but stay open to meeting someone who lives closer. If the relationship with gf survives this challenge, then maybe you 2 really do luv each other. tell your cousin to mind her own business, she's a negativity volcano.
 

Sam the Caveman

Good'n Greasy
Veteran
I was in a long distance relationship for a year once. She lived 1200 miles away. I met her on a ski trip through a friend who was trying to get with her friend at a joes crab shack. We got along great and truly enjoyed each others company. We spent a lot of time on the phone and a lot of money on plane tickets, but in the end she wasn't moving over here and I wasn't moving over there so we eventually just quit talking. We're still on good terms, but don't talk anymore. Maybe if I'm single and in town for skiing, I'll give her a ring for breakfast or dinner sometime, I'm wanting to move now, but not there.
 

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