I need a quick and stealthy way to process my crop, please help!

[Hasselhoff1337]

Hi guys! Guerilla grower here (outdoor) and I really need a good way to make my to be harvested plants smokeable. I really can't do a proper drying/curing as much as it sucks I just gotta find another way.

I'm fine with quality loss of all kinds, as I will probably have a bit and most important is to process the herb from freshly cut to pretty much smokeable in 2 days. Unless I can do it stealthily and smell-free.

So far I've the two only solid options seems to be:
1. Feeeze over night, make Bubble hash, leave to dry for a few days (such small sizes shouldnt be an issue).
2. Water curing and speed drying in one of those machines that dries chilis and mushrooms and what not.

Are there any other ways?

And no, I'm not a teenager hiding my stash from mom. But.... my wife will only give me the OK if I can do it in a smell free way (two days of smell is OK) that the kids wont notice (I can send them off for a weekend to grandma hehe). Its also illegal or so would be bad if the wrong person comes over.

 

[chilliwilli]

How about making some dry ice hash?

 

[star crash]

Make wax or shatter to salvage whatever you can …Even then it will only be as good as the material that you’re making it from

 

[Hasselhoff1337]

How about making some dry ice hash?

I'll look into it, thanks! Actually right now I feel I might just do the water curing to get rid of the smell and then pack it in plastic containers along with those cheap one use dehumidifiers.

As long as I can toke one and get blasted once the kids are asleep I'm happy haha.

 

[Cuddles]

you can just put them in paper bags and let them cure that way. I´ve been curing mine this way and I put it in a cupboard - turned out well. plus I only really smelled it when I opened the door. But the odour becomes less and less after a while.
Store it all in the cellar or attic or outside-ish ,wherever it is not too damp or wet, - wherever the rest of the family can´t smell it.
You gotta use dry bud for processing anway don´t you? I´ve never tried to make anything using fresh bud myself...
btw, how many plants do you have?

 

[GMT]

Hang it in a wardrobe, doors open. Fan heater on its lowest setting blowing into the bottom of the wardrobe. It'll dry quickly, but don't do it in one go. It's also not dry when you think it is.
water curing can take a week and destroys the taste. I'd only do that if making butter after.

 

[DurtyDoper1991]

What kinda climate are you working with?maybe I can help.

 

[f-e]

Any budget concerns, and how much to process.

Ideally you can pick up a cheap tent/fan/filter and have a place to put it.
I think this is what an on-suite is for.

$150 really isn't a lot, to save your weed getting ruined.

The other option might be taking a bucket of iso on site, and swishing the buds around in it. It's a bit wasteful, but you will get some oil off them. Water and iso mix, which isn't ideal. However salt separates them, leaving the oil in the iso.

 

[StickyBandit]

What quantity are we talking?
I like the tent, fan, carbon filter idea

 

[Hasselhoff1337]

Any budget concerns, and how much to process.
​​​​​​

Ideally you can pick up a cheap tent/fan/filter and have a place to put it.
I think this is what an on-suite is for.

$150 really isn't a lot, to save your weed getting ruined.

The other option might be taking a bucket of iso on site, and swishing the buds around in it. It's a bit wasteful, but you will get some oil off them. Water and iso mix, which isn't ideal. However salt separates them, leaving the oil in the iso.

Thanks for your input dude.

No, money is not an issue but the kids will find the tent sooner or later those curious bastards haha. Is it possible to dry in the house over a weekend then cure in a cabin that is not heated? Cause wife does not want weight equal to a prison sentence in the house for long. Just not worth the risk going to jail to get tasty buds
​​​They can taste like ass for all I care as long as I can get high every now n again hehe. Men

​​​​​​

 

[Hasselhoff1337]

What quantity are we talking?
I like the tent, fan, carbon filter idea

Estimating 200 grams or so so its not that much rly. But tent is hard to hide from the kids hehe.

 

[Cuddles]

200 gr is not too much I guess. If you have a cabin put it all in there from the start. Use paper bags. Is this cabin a safe place in terms of the odour and what kindo of a climate are you dealing with? Are you in a hot one or a cold and damp one?

 

[f-e]

Do you know how to string a box? 200g is just a drying box full. They fit inside the larger vac bags with the side opening. You could hang them in the box, leaving it open with a fan on it in a warm room. Shift out the bulk of the moisture, then seal the bag with your desiccant inside. As a first run it would be very hard to judge and burping might be impossible in your situation.

I have Peli cases. Some knock off ones are cheap. That might be a locking option. Giving enough space to store your weed securely for the coming year. All containers let a little smell out as the weather warms though.

I can't comment on the outbuilding. There is such a range of types and weather systems.

 

[flylowgethigh]

Hide it in the attic?

 

[grayeyes]

Instead of your guerilla grow maybe a dispensary would work better for you. Or a bonfire. Not being able to dry and cure is essential if you are going to grow.

 

[sneezydog]

Ok . I got the Best way here, hands down. Cob it. Go look at the malawi cob curing thread, its vacuum sealed after any the first bit of any drying method, a speed drying method would work for this.
This is it, honestly. Good luck! post your cob there if you can!
This is stealth, and improves the herb in my opinion, and you can still cure for months.

 

[ojd]

If money or space to store machine isn't an issue look into a Freeze drying machine, dry in 24 hours with the best smell/taste you could ever get

 

[Hombre del mont]

I'm with @sneezydog , cob curing is the way And it will give you a smooth and tasty smoke i no time at all. Plus you get the added bonus that you can just eat a little cob and be high all day!

I've been growing my own for over 30 yrs and these days I only make cobs!

 

[revegeta666]

Glad to see the cob patrol is here lol. I would agree this method should be the stealthiest, as vacuum sealing the weed means zero smells.

 

[Hombre del mont]

Glad to see the cob patrol is here lol. I would agree this method should be the stealthiest, vacuum sealing the weed means zero smells.

I never pass up an opportunity to promote cobs and cobbing!

Although in this case cobbing is an ideal solution.

I've just re read the opening post and noticed the date is January! I reckon it's been well dried by now and probably smoked as well!