longtime reader and poster, this is a new account
So i've read on IC for ages now and a theme that always comes up is working with partners. People ask, should I work with a partner and the answer is usually "NO!!" unless the person is like your own flesh and blood but that type of person and relationship is on a level most people will never experience with anyone outside of their immediate family or very very close associates.
i made a big mistake of getting involved in a situation with a partner because of my financial predicament at the time.he had startup costs and i was dead broke and dealing with legal problems so i jumped at the chance. in hindsight, i should have just bided my time and saved up my money for longer but whats done is done.
Things haven't been going good. The guy is less experienced than me but he doesn't respect me or my suggestions and decisions. this pertains to everyday life as well as growing. I've let him have his way in room design etc. a few times, mostly with me regretting it. According to his professional training, he should be good at this shit, but he just says the dumbest things and has the stupidest ideas. Just mickey mouse bullshit you'd find in a rundown crack house. I cant even explain the stuff its so stupid.
I can't really leave the guy alone to work on anything, he needs constant monitoring when he is doing anything to the plants or else he might fuck everything up. I got a job to help pay the bills because times are tough. I should be on disability but I got fucked on that one so even though working a physical job every day is a major struggle (by lunchtime my pain is brutal) so I've left my partner in charge of daily duties, i.e. cleaning, maintenance, watering , etc. I can't handle coming home from lifting heavy shit all day to take care of my plants. I cook for myself and eat and fall asleep basically and then repeat until the weekend. On the weekend I take care of another room that is bangin along thanks to me and nobody else. i have no social life, people always ask me to come out but i gotta make up some excuse cause i know i gotta spend weekends taking care of the grow. this doesnt bother me. i enjoy working on my plants but what bothers me is all the sacrifices im making while this lazy motherfucker sits around. his money has run out and he pays his share of bills from monthly government cheques, i made a HUGE mistake of not getting an explicit monetary figure going in and now this dead broke piece of shit sits at home and collects while i work my ass off.
Our timer motor burnt out and since he doesnt work and collects free money from the gov. we agreed that we'd swap it out next turn because he's gonna be home all day and re-wiring #6 romex to a new subpanel with plants in the room is a major pain in the ass. Second fucking day he forgets to turn the lights on. I guess he sat at home watching TV and smoking weed all day and just fell asleep and missed the time.So I can forgive that once, I mean could of happened to me (no it wouldn't have).
Next fucking week I wake up to my beautiful weekend where I can rest and recover and prepare for the next hellish work-week and I go into one room to check on the plants. You wouldnt believe the shit I saw, dead plants everywhere. My beautiful Haze moms were dead as fuck. My clones are all ravaged and dying. All my partner had for responsibilities was feeding the plants fresh PH'd water. But for some reason, my brand new pH meter which was working fine for me for 3 weeks already, and which i used almost daily before I got my job, and which I calibrated every time I used it, fucked up, and my partner didn't realize it, and he proceeded to keep adding PH down to the water until it was basically pure acid and fed it to the plants. I have my suspicions about what happened to the meter, I think he just did something stupid to it and ruined it but, ok, equipment failure happens.
if it had been me, I woulda been like, "oh gee, I added 30ml of fucking PH down to the water and the PH is barely budging, maybe something is wrong". what made it worse is the lazy fucker didnt want to dump out an old 30gal res and mix up the water in that, so he made each batch of water individually in a 1 quart container. so he was going back and forth between the room and mixing up water and PH down in a 1 quart fucking container. God help me.
he told me that the first quart needed a bit of PH down, and the next needed more, and the next needed way more than the last. So wouldnt an intelligent fucking individual realize that something is wrong with the picture???? i mean come on, if you had to add this much before to the water to reach the right PH you'd need to add the exact same to the next batch to reach that same PH. if not something is really fucked up. Having said that i still cant believe he didnt have the initiative to just mix up a big batch in a reservoir rather than doing it by the quart, but i cant think of that anymore without wanting to shoot myself. p.s. I deduced all of this through a series of questioning that was more like an interrogation. he didnt know what he did was wrong, i had to ask him a series of questions and get explanations of what he did to tell him that he basically fed the plants straight PH down (or he might as well have, woulda got the same results).
at one point in the questioning, i asked him what the temperature of the water he fed the plants was. He tells me, "The same temperature as the room". i'm like, "What? what do you mean the same temperature as the room?" he goes, "the water was around the same temperature as the room". im like, "Thats a weird fucking way of describing the water temperature. do you mean you left the reservoir in the room so the water went to the same temperature as the ambient temps?" no, he didnt mean that he meant "the same temeperature of the room". thats all i got out of him. still havent figured that one out. i explicitly told him the water temp should be at 68f but for some reason, he made it as the "same temperature of the room". note, the room runs at 80F so you figure that one out. I still can't. It makes my head hurt too much to try and follow that kind of logic.
So he might as well have opened the bottle of pH down and dumped it on my plants cause thats basically what he did anyways. my rare and beautiful moms are all dead, all my clones are dead or dying. thank fuck ive still been taking care of the flower room and it is still buzzing along. ive basically barred him from entering it without saying so.
And guess who cleaned out the room and took the dead plants out and vacummed and scrubbed? FUCKING ME. not even a god damn apology from the guy. Nothing. now if i had forgot to wash the dishes or left some fucking peanut butter and bread crumbs on the counter i wouldnt have heard the end of it. that domestic shit is of great concern to him but when it comes to the plants this guy (who has a university degree from a prestigious school in a technical field) cant take the initiative to get on the internet and read up on some plant issues if something comes up. all i ever hear are: "the plants look droopy" "that leaf is yellowing" etc. never does he attempt to rectify a problem. just sees them and reports to me and expects me to fix it or he causes them and there i am stuck cleaning them up.
this guy used to be my friend. we've known eachother for over 15 years. he excelled in school and previously i would have told you he is a solid stand-up guy and i wouldnt hesitate working with him.
we had planned out a large property purchase together but i fucking hate the guy now. i cant stand thinking that im stuck partnering with him for the next two or three turns until i get back on my feet financially. He fucking disgusts me. Everything about him. His attitude, what he does with his time, everything. I avoid confontration so he has no idea how I'm feeling. But he will not hesitate to criticize me on something or order me around. On the weekends i just take care of my plants and leave the house so i dont have to be around him. i actually look forward to going to work so i dont have to see him sit around playing video games and smoking weed all day. i smoke 4-6 joints a day to myself but i dont do it in my pajamas watching cartoons until 6pm. god damnit man.
DONT FUCKING WORK WITH PARTNERS UNLESS YOU LOVE THEM LIKE YOUR MOTHER AND KNOW THEM LIKE YOUR BROTHER
I swear to god next time he gives me shit about leaving a dirty dish out or forgetting to wipe the counter I'm going to fucking throw him in the river.
I'm going solo after this. I'm fucking done with this weak bullshit.I've been in many situations in my life where I've gone into arrangements (Business, scholastic, creative) thinking that everyone is on the same page. But time and time again I find out that I was the only one committed and serious about seeing things through to their successful end. This is my last fucking time. I'm done with helping small people, bringing people in, getting them started. fuck everyone but myself and I'm doing this shit by myself like I started out. the same way its gonna end. I've helped out so many people and given them equipment , clones, knowledge, but its never helped me. Never. in the past few years i've cut off 80% of my friends because we haven't been on the same page and our lives just don't mesh and I'm going for 99%. im sick of being held back by others. im done with it all.
rant over. i really needed to explain all that. i hope this serves as a warning to you all about partnerships. I take my fair share of the blame but I could have never seen this coming. Its like he transformed from a regular dude into a lazy piece of shit over the course of a few months . In all my experience, I could have NEVER seen this coming. I wish I could portray the whole transformation of this guy accurately becuase I know in no way can my words describe what I've witnessed over the past few months. It boggles my mind that someone that appeared to solid, so dedicated, has turned into this lazy loser. Simply amazing. It took standing back from the situation and re-assessing it all to realize the magnitude of this fuckery.
So i've read on IC for ages now and a theme that always comes up is working with partners. People ask, should I work with a partner and the answer is usually "NO!!" unless the person is like your own flesh and blood but that type of person and relationship is on a level most people will never experience with anyone outside of their immediate family or very very close associates.
i made a big mistake of getting involved in a situation with a partner because of my financial predicament at the time.he had startup costs and i was dead broke and dealing with legal problems so i jumped at the chance. in hindsight, i should have just bided my time and saved up my money for longer but whats done is done.
Things haven't been going good. The guy is less experienced than me but he doesn't respect me or my suggestions and decisions. this pertains to everyday life as well as growing. I've let him have his way in room design etc. a few times, mostly with me regretting it. According to his professional training, he should be good at this shit, but he just says the dumbest things and has the stupidest ideas. Just mickey mouse bullshit you'd find in a rundown crack house. I cant even explain the stuff its so stupid.
I can't really leave the guy alone to work on anything, he needs constant monitoring when he is doing anything to the plants or else he might fuck everything up. I got a job to help pay the bills because times are tough. I should be on disability but I got fucked on that one so even though working a physical job every day is a major struggle (by lunchtime my pain is brutal) so I've left my partner in charge of daily duties, i.e. cleaning, maintenance, watering , etc. I can't handle coming home from lifting heavy shit all day to take care of my plants. I cook for myself and eat and fall asleep basically and then repeat until the weekend. On the weekend I take care of another room that is bangin along thanks to me and nobody else. i have no social life, people always ask me to come out but i gotta make up some excuse cause i know i gotta spend weekends taking care of the grow. this doesnt bother me. i enjoy working on my plants but what bothers me is all the sacrifices im making while this lazy motherfucker sits around. his money has run out and he pays his share of bills from monthly government cheques, i made a HUGE mistake of not getting an explicit monetary figure going in and now this dead broke piece of shit sits at home and collects while i work my ass off.
Our timer motor burnt out and since he doesnt work and collects free money from the gov. we agreed that we'd swap it out next turn because he's gonna be home all day and re-wiring #6 romex to a new subpanel with plants in the room is a major pain in the ass. Second fucking day he forgets to turn the lights on. I guess he sat at home watching TV and smoking weed all day and just fell asleep and missed the time.So I can forgive that once, I mean could of happened to me (no it wouldn't have).
Next fucking week I wake up to my beautiful weekend where I can rest and recover and prepare for the next hellish work-week and I go into one room to check on the plants. You wouldnt believe the shit I saw, dead plants everywhere. My beautiful Haze moms were dead as fuck. My clones are all ravaged and dying. All my partner had for responsibilities was feeding the plants fresh PH'd water. But for some reason, my brand new pH meter which was working fine for me for 3 weeks already, and which i used almost daily before I got my job, and which I calibrated every time I used it, fucked up, and my partner didn't realize it, and he proceeded to keep adding PH down to the water until it was basically pure acid and fed it to the plants. I have my suspicions about what happened to the meter, I think he just did something stupid to it and ruined it but, ok, equipment failure happens.
if it had been me, I woulda been like, "oh gee, I added 30ml of fucking PH down to the water and the PH is barely budging, maybe something is wrong". what made it worse is the lazy fucker didnt want to dump out an old 30gal res and mix up the water in that, so he made each batch of water individually in a 1 quart container. so he was going back and forth between the room and mixing up water and PH down in a 1 quart fucking container. God help me.
he told me that the first quart needed a bit of PH down, and the next needed more, and the next needed way more than the last. So wouldnt an intelligent fucking individual realize that something is wrong with the picture???? i mean come on, if you had to add this much before to the water to reach the right PH you'd need to add the exact same to the next batch to reach that same PH. if not something is really fucked up. Having said that i still cant believe he didnt have the initiative to just mix up a big batch in a reservoir rather than doing it by the quart, but i cant think of that anymore without wanting to shoot myself. p.s. I deduced all of this through a series of questioning that was more like an interrogation. he didnt know what he did was wrong, i had to ask him a series of questions and get explanations of what he did to tell him that he basically fed the plants straight PH down (or he might as well have, woulda got the same results).
at one point in the questioning, i asked him what the temperature of the water he fed the plants was. He tells me, "The same temperature as the room". i'm like, "What? what do you mean the same temperature as the room?" he goes, "the water was around the same temperature as the room". im like, "Thats a weird fucking way of describing the water temperature. do you mean you left the reservoir in the room so the water went to the same temperature as the ambient temps?" no, he didnt mean that he meant "the same temeperature of the room". thats all i got out of him. still havent figured that one out. i explicitly told him the water temp should be at 68f but for some reason, he made it as the "same temperature of the room". note, the room runs at 80F so you figure that one out. I still can't. It makes my head hurt too much to try and follow that kind of logic.
So he might as well have opened the bottle of pH down and dumped it on my plants cause thats basically what he did anyways. my rare and beautiful moms are all dead, all my clones are dead or dying. thank fuck ive still been taking care of the flower room and it is still buzzing along. ive basically barred him from entering it without saying so.
And guess who cleaned out the room and took the dead plants out and vacummed and scrubbed? FUCKING ME. not even a god damn apology from the guy. Nothing. now if i had forgot to wash the dishes or left some fucking peanut butter and bread crumbs on the counter i wouldnt have heard the end of it. that domestic shit is of great concern to him but when it comes to the plants this guy (who has a university degree from a prestigious school in a technical field) cant take the initiative to get on the internet and read up on some plant issues if something comes up. all i ever hear are: "the plants look droopy" "that leaf is yellowing" etc. never does he attempt to rectify a problem. just sees them and reports to me and expects me to fix it or he causes them and there i am stuck cleaning them up.
this guy used to be my friend. we've known eachother for over 15 years. he excelled in school and previously i would have told you he is a solid stand-up guy and i wouldnt hesitate working with him.
we had planned out a large property purchase together but i fucking hate the guy now. i cant stand thinking that im stuck partnering with him for the next two or three turns until i get back on my feet financially. He fucking disgusts me. Everything about him. His attitude, what he does with his time, everything. I avoid confontration so he has no idea how I'm feeling. But he will not hesitate to criticize me on something or order me around. On the weekends i just take care of my plants and leave the house so i dont have to be around him. i actually look forward to going to work so i dont have to see him sit around playing video games and smoking weed all day. i smoke 4-6 joints a day to myself but i dont do it in my pajamas watching cartoons until 6pm. god damnit man.
DONT FUCKING WORK WITH PARTNERS UNLESS YOU LOVE THEM LIKE YOUR MOTHER AND KNOW THEM LIKE YOUR BROTHER
I swear to god next time he gives me shit about leaving a dirty dish out or forgetting to wipe the counter I'm going to fucking throw him in the river.
I'm going solo after this. I'm fucking done with this weak bullshit.I've been in many situations in my life where I've gone into arrangements (Business, scholastic, creative) thinking that everyone is on the same page. But time and time again I find out that I was the only one committed and serious about seeing things through to their successful end. This is my last fucking time. I'm done with helping small people, bringing people in, getting them started. fuck everyone but myself and I'm doing this shit by myself like I started out. the same way its gonna end. I've helped out so many people and given them equipment , clones, knowledge, but its never helped me. Never. in the past few years i've cut off 80% of my friends because we haven't been on the same page and our lives just don't mesh and I'm going for 99%. im sick of being held back by others. im done with it all.
rant over. i really needed to explain all that. i hope this serves as a warning to you all about partnerships. I take my fair share of the blame but I could have never seen this coming. Its like he transformed from a regular dude into a lazy piece of shit over the course of a few months . In all my experience, I could have NEVER seen this coming. I wish I could portray the whole transformation of this guy accurately becuase I know in no way can my words describe what I've witnessed over the past few months. It boggles my mind that someone that appeared to solid, so dedicated, has turned into this lazy loser. Simply amazing. It took standing back from the situation and re-assessing it all to realize the magnitude of this fuckery.