What would you do?

[bobblehead]

Educated? Cool, me too. How educated?

Traveling the world is great, do it... But you still have to come home eventually.

I'm working on my second bachelor's, with intentions of getting a PhD in research and changing the world.

What's going to make you happy? For me, living for myself wasn't the answer.

 

[MrDanky]

tagged

 

[justpassnthru]

Get a puppy! Walk her frequently...
You'll discover a whole new life of love and passion, for outdoors and even when home alone! Unless you start traveling? imho...jpt

if you don't have know the trading..don't do it, it can be too RISKY.

 

[gloryoskie]

I have heard that happiness can be found in serving others.

Learn humility, charity and the strength that comes from giving
fully to others.

Then go sightseeing.

You're only thirty, make sure not to ask the same questions of
yourself when you're fifty.

 

[floralheart]

Hire a dominatrix. She'll tell you what to do.

 

[BlueBlazer]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Happiness is about being happy NOW, regardless of what is occuring.[/FONT]

This!

So simple of a concept and so hard for so many to accept.

I was just talking to my son who is also a early 30s, educated, currently single male. He is also concerned about the direction of his life. I told him the same thing - it is your expectations and desires that are making you unhappy. Happiness really is a decision.

Don't spend your time waiting to be happy or waiting for something to provide happiness. That is the true waste of time.

 

[Rob547]

My first thought when reading OP was to consider some NPO work? I'm sure they would be fine with part-time help or whatever you worked out. Find a good cause and go from there.

 

[HidingInTheHaze]

I would go on a porn star cruise, hit up the bunny ranch or just tag as much poon as possible and enjoy life.

Just ride the wave of fate.

 

[DarthFader1]

Hey guys, thanks for all the great responses so far. This is why i love being on this forum i can post a really tough question and get some really well thought out responses within a few hours from all over the world, booooom!

Firstly @ South Florida, mate, really nice post Ive read a bit of your other philosophical thread, found it a bit heavy in places but overall i think i get at least some of what your saying. Living in the moment is definitely something we all need to work on. I totally agree with that. Your absolutely correct Sir, no, im not happy with my life. Most of my unhappiness comes from not doing anything meaningful and feeling like im just wasting my precious time here on planet earth. That being said the last few years i have really been trying to appreciate all the things i DO have, instead of focusing on what i don't have. It's kind of similar to the buddhist philosophy what your saying.. You know how they say want of things leads to suffering, whether it be something now or in the future, it causes stress and unnecessary suffering on ourselves. Truth is i have alot in my life already, i know a lot of people would kill to be in my position and i always need to remember that.

Re the trading ideas, funny thing is my major was finance many years ago, i used to know complex financial algebraic calculations like the back of my hand. These days, i need a calculator half the time for simple arithmetic lol.

@ Weird, you always get me thinking with some of the things you say man. This quote here, "[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Being creatures of a social design living in a world with advanced societies most of our full potentials are intrinsically tied to the people around us"

The older i get, the more i find the above quote true. I used to think i didn't want nor need people around me, so i tried periods of isolation and found myself craving human contact after 6 months or so.

@ Paladin, LOL yeah man hopefully one day i will find a suitable woman and we will have some kids. I do know if i ever have children i will do my best to be the best father i can ever be, too many full retard parents in the world imo..

@ Bobblehead, Im not that educated man in a tertiary sense, ive made it as far as a bachelors degree and then a graduate diploma. I do read very widely though and i would like to think my eyes are fairly open about many issues in the world today. Good for you going for your Phd man, thats awesome! To answer your last question what's going to make me happy, i think your spot on about living for yourself wasn't the answer. This is basically the conclusion ive come to also after a decade or more of being quite selfish with my time.

@ JPT, I have a dog bro! He's my best friend in the world he's a 5 year old staffy, i also have 2 cats. My animals provide me with a massive amount of happiness I do also want to travel but i have some issues at the moment with overseas travel because of my convictions touched on in the degeneracy thread i linked on page 1. I pretty much have to just bide my time before i can travel again, and even then some countries like the USA will pretty much never let me in, or at least not for 10 or 20 years at best. Luckily if ever i do go travelling my parents have a farm where all my animals can live if needs be. I couldn't bare the thought of just leaving them though so i dont know, they're like my family man!!

@Gloryoskie, Thanks man, i think your right that some happiness maybe found in serving others. This is something i need to work on for sure.

@ FloralHeart, LOL, i would probably assault a dominatrix the second she layed a hand on me, being told what to do and ruffed up by a woman (or a man for that matter) is definitely NOT my idea of fun lol

@Blueblazer, Thankyou, really good post mate.Thats very interesting you have a son my age with similar concerns about his life. What is he doing at the moment?

Thankyou everyone for replying so far ive already had some seeds of thought implanted in my mind Please keep any ideas or thoughts rolling in as im sure there's many more people than just me out there with these questions.

cheers
darth


[/FONT]

 

[DarthFader1]

I would go on a porn star cruise, hit up the bunny ranch or just tag as much poon as possible and enjoy life.

Just ride the wave of fate.

Lmao, thats some funny s*** right there bro, nice one. I think maybe you should read my 10 years of degeneracy thread linked on page 1, ive ridden the wave of fate pretty hard in the past lol

 

[DarthFader1]

I think there's a very fine line between living in the moment and truly appreciating all we have, and also looking ahead to the future and making some plans or goals. These two things kind of contradict each other in a way, but they surely aren't mutually exclusive? Just a tough balancing act imo

 

[BlueBlazer]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]@Blueblazer, Thankyou, really good post mate.Thats very interesting you have a son my age with similar concerns about his life. What is he doing at the moment?[/FONT][/FONT]

Same thing I did when I was his age . . . not listening to his old man.

He's underwhelmed with his job, but he's also really good at it. He'd like to try a new city, but he's also got ties where he is. He's got woman problems - there I couldn't help too much. By the time I was his age, he was six and I had been married to his mother for seven years. I found my love early, he's still searching and he's correct to say he may never find it. Lot's of folks don't.

Age really does give perspective as far as all those worries about the future. When you're older, the future is here. It's a lot easier to see that right now is all that really matters once you're on the other side of some of life's ass kicking.

My advice to you is the same as to my son. Do what seems good to you, even if folks claim you will fail. At the same time, try to keep in mind that tomorrow is just a concept. You short change yourself living there.

 

[southflorida]

Firstly @ South Florida, mate, really nice post Ive read a bit of your other philosophical thread, found it a bit heavy in places but overall i think i get at least some of what your saying.

That shows you're quite open-minded and that is one of the first steps toward experiencing the truth in your own direct experience.

Living in the moment is definitely something we all need to work on. I totally agree with that.

The thing is that we don't really have to work on it from one perspective.

What we have to stop doing is allowing beliefs and assumptions to take the place of the truth and fact.

Think about it, what you currently believe, don't you think that it is the truth? But is it?

Your absolutely correct Sir, no, im not happy with my life. Most of my unhappiness comes from not doing anything meaningful and feeling like im just wasting my precious time here on planet earth.

That most of your unhappiness comes from not doing anything meaningfull in your life is an assumption. Whatever you have done, are doing now, and will ever do is the only thing that is real and genuine. Your "experience" is what is true. Your thoughts, beliefs, and assumptions about that experience are concepts.

It is important to make a distinction between experience and concept.

You are unhappy because you are focusing on concepts and not being here and now in your direct experience.

You are actually "resisting" the now experience and wanting it to be different from what it is.

This is the root of your suffering, struggle and un-happiness.

That being said the last few years i have really been trying to appreciate all the things i DO have, instead of focusing on what i don't have. It's kind of similar to the buddhist philosophy what your saying.. You know how they say want of things leads to suffering, whether it be something now or in the future, it causes stress and unnecessary suffering on ourselves. Truth is i have alot in my life already, i know a lot of people would kill to be in my position and i always need to remember that.

...what you need to do is simply notice that all there ever "is" - is the one, whole, "now-experience" occuring in your awareness.

...once you become aware of "this" - you will start grasping that you are the "awareness" - the "experience" - itself.

...this is what enlightenment is - simply knowing who you truly "are."

 

[Stonefree69]

...this is what enlightenment is - simply knowing who you truly "are."

When I stopped seeking I found the answers to about 3 years worth of Zen koans.

 

[southflorida]

I think there's a very fine line between living in the moment and truly appreciating all we have, and also looking ahead to the future and making some plans or goals. These two things kind of contradict each other in a way, but they surely aren't mutually exclusive? Just a tough balancing act imo

...there is actually no thin line.

...now is always now.

...when you plan for the future or remember something that occured in the past, this conceptual activity always happens "now."

...it cannot happen at any other moment except now. (because there is nothing ever but now )

...and notice that when the event that you planned for the future actually occurs, it happens now, and it is always different in nature than the conceptual imagining of what it will be like.

...this is a hard thing for the "mind" to grasp, the reason being simple: the mind operates on the illusion of time, it is always remembering the past and imagining a possible future.

...this conceptual thinking, remembering, and imagining always occurs "now."

...this is something that is completely ignored in our culture.

...and most folks are so "hypnotized by" and "in-love" with their past events and future projections...that they are convinced that the past and future are true-in-and-of-themselves.

...but, they are NOT.

...they are simply conceptual activities occuring inside the mind "here and now" and always, and only, "here and now."

...to actually deeply grasp this you have to clearly see this occuring in your own direct-experience.

...it is NOT something to be believed or assumed.

 

[kaochiu]

Peace of mind? First step is living in the country. Second it's getting used to, and third enjoy it. No way back.

 

[southflorida]

When I stopped seeking I found the answers to about 3 years worth of Zen koans.

great insight...there is nothing to seek...all is now

 

[Wiggs Dannyboy]

Some things i like in no particular order:

Animals
Sports
Weed
Woman
Performance Cars
Writing
Reading
Poker




Ummmmm

"[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]If you were a early 30s educated currently single male that really wanted to do something with their life, what would YOU do? Obviously this is a very expansive question, but lets just leave it open ended for now.[/FONT]"

Hey Darth...for starters, I don't feel you should try to figure out what you should do based on what others feel is "something." I know you're probably just trying to get some ideas, but this is one of those things that really really has to come from within. Especially for somebody like yourself who obviously has a wide range of things that you find interesting. You could easily listen to somebody who has a persuasive personality, and who is in love with their line of work, make a case for their job that would inspire you...temporarily. No, you really gotta dig in your own dirt to find the right answer.

There is a real good book on finding the best career for yourself, it's called "What Color Is Your Parachute," it's been around for a few decades and gets a thorough update every couple of years to take account of the changes in the world of employment. I would definitely invest the $25 in the latest edition, read it, and do the little exercises that helps narrow down your best direction.

Now, regarding your original post, and the list that followed....I think that you are a person with a wide variety of interests that also wants to have a positive impact on the world around you. That about explains me to a T when I was your age 20 years ago. Here are some things that crossed my mind:

People who have a lot of different interests frequently are also people who tend to get bored doing the same thing all the time. If that explains your personality, and you like to write (me too), then I think following a path towards journalism makes a lot of sense. You get to write, you get to learn about all kinds of stuff depending on what you choose to focus on, and you don't have to continuously focus on the same thing over and over.

If you pursued the writing path, you could take a bunch of different branches depending on what really floats your boat. You could combine the writing with what you consider to be important issues in society today or what's going on in the world. That would satisfy your desire to have a positive impact with your life.

It took me the first 40 years of my life to find out who I am, and one big reason it took so long was because I found EVERYTHING interesting, but I didn't have a strong passion for anything in particular. At around the age of 40 I discovered my passion was for ideas...what makes the world tick...and how innovation is needed to make the world a better place. This was right after I had completed a degree in commercial photography. Ayecarumba!

At that point, re-evaluating where I should go with my life, I started doing some career path research, and discovered a line of work that I had never heard of...industrial design. That job was made especially for my personality type. I wish I had discovered it earlier, because I never was able to get into a program...competition had increased dramatically to get into these programs, all my grades (they wouldn't consider my photography degree) were from a long time ago and weren't that great because I was never a serious student.

So, now I've become a starving artist, and would be entrepreneur trying to start a business. I can't mention what the business is because it is actually something that isn't being done currently, it is in the design world, and is one of those things that seems like it should be a part of the design pallet but has never caught on. Introducing something that looks completely unique into people's consciousness is quite a challenge.

That's my 2 pennies. Good luck finding the path.

 

[idiit]

If you were a early 30s educated currently single male that really wanted to do something with their life, what would YOU do?

^ i'm 60 yrs old and at your age took your above quoted q. very seriously. it lead me down a very interesting rabbit hole.

i decided that the question was about an a posteriori (after the fact) perspective rather than an a priori (before the fact) perspective. "hindsight is ever better than foresight" is the adage that says it best.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_priori_and_a_posteriori

wtf you ask?

your q. is stated as an a priori perspective; what should i do?
my answer came from an a posteriori perspective; after it is all done, looking back at what i accomplished instead of before i embark what should i do. you are asking "what course should i embark on". this is "before the fact" perspective; ie a priori.

my answer came when i asked "after my life is over what did i get done". this is an a posteriori perspective.

when i asked the big Q. from a "looking back what did i get done" perspective it became clear that the Q. was about "what did i accomplish with my life?.

the Q. then centered around accomplishments.

i then contemplated plausible worthwhile accomplishments available for me to pursue.

i then broke down the possible quests into " obtainable" and "shooting for the almost unobtainable , but still remotely possible". i decided i could shoot for the stars as long as i had basic essentials covered ( maslow's hierarchy of food, shelter, safety, family stuff, etc...).

the basic stuff as depicted in the above image took a lot of time for me to determine how to achieve for my life.

the fun part was the "shooting for the stars" part.

i decided for me that after i planned about a common sense "boots on the solid earth" approach to taking care of the basic everday biz. i wanted to have the opportunity to accomplish something spectacular, even if that dream was way woo woo by most ppls perspectives.

so, i decided i needed to contemplate what spectacular accomplish could i set my eyes on.

i do meditational yoga and came across a yoga called sahaj marg and its guru babuji. babuji said that the key was "personal caliber". basically, idiots think poorly, see poorly, accomplish poorly. higher calibers are and live a life 180 degrees in contrast to an idiot's life.


ok, so how does one raise one's "personal caliber" and what would a person of caliber deem a worthwhile pursuit? remember little kids, teenagers, adults, old geezers all have different priorities based on maturity ( also based on what's available to them at that time, but very much determined by maturity). from an a posteriori (end of my life, looking back) instead of a young "looking forward" perspective what did i want to "have accomplished"?

the yoga answered these questions for me. not only did i want my caliber raised, i also intuitively knew my agenda/priorities would evolve over time. i decided for me that i wanted to be a spiritual caliber as close to the highest spiritual caliber i could spot. in meditational yoga the adage "on what you meditate you become" is accepted as a truism. i meditate a lot on the spiritual entity i perceive as the highest caliber to exist/existed.

i feel that this practice has really improved my mind, emotions, heart. it makes decisions easier and clearer for me.

i still like smoking bud in the evening, women including companionship and sex, cannabis breeding/pollen chucking, food, researching topics of interest. i believe that my caliber being raised enables me to accomplish better. what i choose to accomplish is free will choice that matures over time.

higher caliber enables higher accomplishments. the yoga raises my caliber enabling higher accomplishments. what you decide to accomplish will evolve over time and circumstances.

 

[DarthFader1]

Hey guys, getting late down here at the bottom of the world

Ive been reading the awesome stuff coming from everyone, im too tired to respond fully until the morning and a coffee when i can give it the time it deserves. But yeah the last post from idiit thankyou very much for stopping by and posting some gold up in here Sir!! I was secretly hoping that there would be some cameo appearances from some of our old school members I need to read your post a couple more times, but im quite interested in this concept of personal caliber you speak of, and have thought along those lines kind of remotely before, although had never given it a name.. I have been awar[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]e of the adage "on what you meditate you become" for a while now[/FONT], and im inclined to accept it as truism also. To this extent, im very mindful of what i think about these days although still far from perfect yet but vastly improved

Really helpful stuff coming so far and its cool because everyone has a different take on things and nobody is wrong or right, its just cool to hear different ppls perspectives.

Anyway time to turn the comp off for the night ive been on this thing all day like a crack addict on their magical flute. Time to watch some ATP masters tennis on sky, hit the bong and chill even more than i was before

peace out
darth