Ohh... that's a good one. Very much like how my own parents handled the religion issue. They were brought up Catholics, then eschewed the church and left it up to each of us girls.
I'm not sure what you mean by 'enabling' here.
No, it's not what you said. The message that I got was awfully close to a woman we knew, through her daughter. Her daughter who had zero guidance, whose mother let her do anything and everything she chose from a very early age, and it cost this girl. When she came to live with us she told me I was the closest thing to a real mother she'd ever had, and considering the message her mother had sent her (do ANYTHING to be with a man!) I was very glad I was able to offer her that much. What you wrote reminded me of that.
Ah, my child gains insight and knowing what I do or don't do allows them to make observations, which is an extremely important part of critical thinking skills. However, I never told my kids I smoke pot. I talked to them a LOT about sex, and as a result they've had fairly healthy sex lives, have never made an unwanted or unexpected child or gotten diseases, and I think that's due to my openness and honesty.
And grandmother, too.
That I am human. That part of the human condition, part of being human includes drug use and that it has long before we were ever H. sapiens. That it can be done intelligently, without causing harm to yourself or others. That, were I in a non-medical state, there is such a thing as bad laws, and if you observe a bad law you *must* do what you can to change it or you're as guilty of committing a crime as the 'criminal.' Now, that's a hell of an idea, ain't it? But I didn't share with my boys because back then it was no more legal in California than it was anywhere else, just less harsh penalties. I still have difficulties getting over the paranoia that's been so deeply ingrained.
First I'd like to know what you mean by 'unbiased view' before I try to answer that. What is an unbiased view? Being pro- or anti-cannabis? Or...?
Indeed, and since you said you have a daughter in college I'm sure you may have had instances where she had a teacher or two who essentially pushed their beliefs. I know my boys and the other kids I've been involved with have had teachers like that, and those people can be incredibly influential, especially if their words are not balanced by the child's parents.
I don't see that as odd at all, it's what parents are supposed to do.
I hope that my beliefs are what have made me who I am, and as such, I am hopeful that those beliefs may be imparted to my sons, because I believe that this world needs more critical thinkers instead of lock-steppers. So far it's working pretty well, because my sons question me all the time, and that was a huge part of my goal. They are their mother's sons as far as that goes, that much is for sure!
Ohh... that's a good one. Very much like how my own parents handled the religion issue. They were brought up Catholics, then eschewed the church and left it up to each of us girls.
I'm not sure what you mean by 'enabling' here.
No, it's not what you said. The message that I got was awfully close to a woman we knew, through her daughter. Her daughter who had zero guidance, whose mother let her do anything and everything she chose from a very early age, and it cost this girl. When she came to live with us she told me I was the closest thing to a real mother she'd ever had, and considering the message her mother had sent her (do ANYTHING to be with a man!) I was very glad I was able to offer her that much. What you wrote reminded me of that.
Ah, my child gains insight and knowing what I do or don't do allows them to make observations, which is an extremely important part of critical thinking skills. However, I never told my kids I smoke pot. I talked to them a LOT about sex, and as a result they've had fairly healthy sex lives, have never made an unwanted or unexpected child or gotten diseases, and I think that's due to my openness and honesty.
I also think that the problems they've had with other drugs could have been avoided had I only been as open and honest with them about all of that, instead of leaving it to DARE.
So now I have my granddaughter, and I decided, after discussing it with her parents, that I would be open and honest with her. I have taught her what my 'smoking flowers' are, and what they're for. She knows that they're medicine and for adults only. Just like sex is for adults only. My goal is to give her all the tools necessary for her to make the best decisions for herself, and within that goal is ensuring to the best of our ability a happy, healthy person who contributes to society. When she's old enough, she's going to learn that people do certain things for recreation, such as drinking and smoking. She's not old enough for that right now.
Hide what you do and you lose that opportunity to teach your kids. That's what my kids didn't gain when I didn't tell them about what I did, but my granddaughter will.
And grandmother, too.
That I am human. That part of the human condition, part of being human includes drug use and that it has long before we were ever H. sapiens. That it can be done intelligently, without causing harm to yourself or others. That, were I in a non-medical state, there is such a thing as bad laws, and if you observe a bad law you *must* do what you can to change it or you're as guilty of committing a crime as the 'criminal.' Now, that's a hell of an idea, ain't it? But I didn't share with my boys because back then it was no more legal in California than it was anywhere else, just less harsh penalties. I still have difficulties getting over the paranoia that's been so deeply ingrained.
First I'd like to know what you mean by 'unbiased view' before I try to answer that. What is an unbiased view? Being pro- or anti-cannabis? Or...?
I can only give them my view, no one else's. I can argue the truths I know as well as the untruths, again though, only as *I* see them. And I think I can give them balance by sharing my views.
Indeed, and since you said you have a daughter in college I'm sure you may have had instances where she had a teacher or two who essentially pushed their beliefs. I know my boys and the other kids I've been involved with have had teachers like that, and those people can be incredibly influential, especially if their words are not balanced by the child's parents.
I don't see that as odd at all, it's what parents are supposed to do.
I hope that my beliefs are what have made me who I am, and as such, I am hopeful that those beliefs may be imparted to my sons,So far it's working pretty well, because my sons question me all the time, and that was a huge part of my goal. They are their mother's sons as far as that goes, that much is for sure!
I can see that our approaches to parenting are quite different.
