Has anyone else lost it all yet?

[Guest]

Houses, rentals, assets, pride, hard work, determination. 12 year business in the shitter. Selling my hobbies one by one to eat.

My fault. Hedged my bets and got left holding the dog shit that no one picks up.

For the longest time I thought that starting over isn't what life's about. But I guess its the way things are.

I've watched many people older than me that paid their dues much more than me lose it all as well and I see an acceptance creep into my mind.

I guess I feel like leaving it all and going hermit but wherever you go, there you are.

So here I sit, with growing pot as my main focus because everything is out of my hands now. About to give up on that since we'll have to move soon.

I'm calm, I'm crushed, I'm embarrassed and I felt like sharing.

They can take it away 10 times but they can't take my ability to get it back..... but I'm not sure I want it anymore.

Thanks for listening.

 

[og dmc]

I pretty much live my entire life like that , either I am on top of the world or in the toilet. Thats life.

 

[okwildfire]

man that suck's Jack...sorry bro...keep your chin up man....mind if i ask what happened to cause all that shitty stuff?

 

[rootfingers]

I have been thinking about this much lately. Is it really worth it?

It seems with our hobby a person is forced to constantly alter their life to accommodate security situations (it isn't easy having a decent sized grow and keeping it from everyone in your life).

Yesterday on the radio I heard a conversation about how people change. We loose our ability to change with age (though I think this hobby might keep us younger in mind through its constant exercise), we will spend much more energy on not changing something than it would take to just change something, and the exponential rate of technological change is forcing us to change at an ever faster rate!

After hearing all this I made up my mind that I would embrace the change no matter how hard and play this life like a game that I want to win. Security, in the retirement sense, is not what I am looking for. Fuck it. If I end up loosing it all at some point I'll figure something else out - I'll change. Great human resiliency is the most pure result of our evolution that gave us the ability to reason. And that is how I want to be remembered.

Good thread.

 

[Guest]

Thanks for the comments.

The economy is the reason but that's not exactly complete. My line of work is one that is most affected by this economic downturn and my timing was off by 6 months.

 

[useless people]

life gets boring without ups and downs

 

[mazzakush]

^you work for blackwater?

 

[Navigator330]

I feel you jack, situations may be different. Pain is all the same, i just pulled myself up by the boot straps to get over a 9 year heroin addiction. I lost absolutely everything except for my wonderful girl and my grow hobby. I know i self inflicted my wounds but the outcome is the same. Bottom of the barrel. Good luck man

 

[Guest]

I guess it's best to just realize that things are what you make of them.

 

[Danger Mouse]

Sorry to hear about your troubles, Jack. Been there more than once. I remember eating mustard sandwiched because it was all I could afford. As hard as those times were, looking back, I don't think I was ever happier or felt more free. All you can do is just keep on going. It's hard, but please try to view it as an opportunity. A friend of mine committed suicide last Wednesday. I had no clue things were that bad for him, and I just can't get over the fact he didn't ask me for help. So please don't be too proud to ask someone for help if you need it. You have your health (I assume), you have friends, and you have an excellent hobby to keep you occupied. That's much more than many. Heck, if it gets to the point where you need money just to eat, send me a PM.

Hang in there. Things will improve with time. They always do.

Best,

DM

 

[dank.frank]

not always. I have a friend...that is the most upbeat person in the world and is ALWAYS letting things just kinda trying to make it work...

If there is a loop-hole or a "we're sorry, this has never happened before" then, this is the guy it happens to. EVERYTHING...from cell phones, to utilities, to cars, to jobs, to just the random things that happen to all people. This guys is literally like the ass hole of the universe...if ya know what I mean. He never seems to get an "up"...and even when things work out for him, it isn't too long before some TRULY bizarre things start to happen and he is right back where he started at square one.

This guy is honest, respectable, hard working, positive, and up beat...even through all this...and I mean, I have known the person almost 10 years...and he REALLY tries to make better for himself, but the world resists...no joke.

He at times wants to go be a hermit to avoid the hassle of every day...and trust me, his hassles are 100x worse than anyone I have ever met. I could tell countless stories to support/reflect this.

If karma is real...then this guy is paying for a previous life....!!!

So...my point is...it is not always about how you look at things or about what perspective you look at something through or a "put what you get into it" type of world. Some times it is...don't know why...but it is not a "truth".

Some folks just seem to get shit on more than others...


dank.Frank

 

[Stoner4Life]

I'd offer advice like scaling down & moving into something very affordable on a monthly basis but it sounds like you're pressed for time/money and that usually doesn't leave the option of taking the time for cashing out of the current situation (worse in this lousy economy) if you can't keep the wolf from the door in the meanwhile.

Believe me bro I'm not chastising or accusing you of this but too many people enjoy living at the edge or just beyond their means, a rough patch in the road might then mean a small adjustment but in this economy it will be causing homelessness at rates rivaling the Great Depression.

Any time I use the word YOU below I'm not refering to anyone in particular here but am addressing any and all that fall into the parameters of failing financially and having costly and/or bad habits. Some people (myself especially) tend to have addictive personality traits and need to practice moderation or suffer from not having enough money and energy to live on. With the exception of tobacco I've had to break or profoundly change every one of these habits I've listed below myself.

I surely don't have all the answers but daily habits can be awfully expensive and are often the first that require adjusting. Bottled water, soda, coffee shop coffees, meals prepared out of the home, potato chips (@$3.79 for 9oz that's $6.73 per pound), and finally (imo) here's the kicker that will finish off the weak willed....... They can't/won't give up their vices & will usually immerse themselves farther into them therefore abusing them more, booze & tobacco products. Buying those uber-expensive energy drinks because it helps you through the day? Fuck that shit! go home & get to bed earlier (that'll save you $$$), take care of yourself better, buy some vitamins & take them this time....... I stopped drinking yrs ago but continued to go out to the bars drinking diet pop & shootin' pool, still cost me too much money & energy, now I consider it a treat to do so only a night or two each month in the winter only. btw I do have a six plus month winter up here.

Booze & tobacco will cost you more down the line, you might blame that cold/flu and a few days missed work as lousy luck but you'd not want to blame your brew & cigs for breaking down your immune system on a permanent basis, it'd be the truth. Studies have found that the combination of liquor & tobacco compound the ill effects of each if you use them both, I trust most of these studies as they go AGAINST big business interests and are w/o an agenda as they tend to profit nobody except a person that takes the advice to quit.

If a person seeks lifestyle changes and has some/all of the habits above then usually it's easy to address these over time, one at a time, it can better be accomplished this way. But if the wolfes at the door as a lot of people/families are going under every day now then breaking those costly habits all at once if possible makes more sense as the savings are immediate.

I've eliminated a lot of daily fixes above in the food department and those have to be replaced in some cases. Tang and Kool-Aid are good affordable substitutes for sweet bevs. Buy a Britta or PuR water pitcher to remove tap water impurities, I LOVE the cold fresh clean (& pure as tested by a lab) water from my 375' deep well but I filter it anyway. Instead of trying to replace those chips just limit yourself to a single ounce serving as suggested on the bag, I never eat more than that myself and I've found that's plenty for the side dish of a meal. ENERGY drinks, as a species we've existed w/o them for thousands of yrs, wtf makes them so in demand now? Poor daily/nightly habits is what. If you're living on energy drinks it's likely because you're burning the candle at both ends, anytime you leave your home you're spending $$ unless you're walking and doing shit that's 100% free. Stay home get the right amount of sleep, do better at work with REAL clarity & NOT caffinated edginess, who knows you might keep that job and get a raise if your performance improves. Getting more sleep means being able to wake earlier to make a brown bag lunch is possible, tastes better, more nutricious, cheaper.

Go ahead and do the math yourself, only you know how much you spend on items that can be eliminated from your daily routine. Work 20 days a month? eliminate $7-10 per day there from food habits alone & that's $150-200 per month, if your significant other works too & you can eliminate that amount again we're looking at a nice chunk of your rent or all of your utility bills.

Spend the $35 for a Sam's club membership and shop WISELY with it. I love boneless skinless chicken thighs as my chix meat, at the local market it's over $4.29per lb, @ Sam's club I pay $2.09per lb whan I buy it by the 40# case, yes I have a chest freezer.

I live in the country & buy my beef from a neighbor, I fucking LAUGH @ the $9.79 per lb price for rib eye steaks & $3.00 ground beef in the market, I pay appx $1.40 - 1.75per lb for a side of beef, this includes every cut & roast from the side & many #s of high quality ground beef, I can assure you it's tastier than store bought beef. You might live in the city but can take a drive into the country, go to where you usually see beef cattle grazing & knock on that farmers door, be polite & humble looking and enquire about a side or 1/2 side purchase depending on your $$$ & freezer space. Offer to come back & be there to handle, wrap and mark that beef, the farmer always butchers, you can package that meat in small or lg packs depending on family size. I'm single and do a LOT of wrapping of individual meal sized packages. A small chest freezer @ Sam's Club is less than $200 & will pay for itself the first time you fill it on the cheap, Energy Star efficient it will not cost much to run.

Other things that'll save money today? I can afford my cell phone as I have a $35 plan and I never excede my limits, extra cars w/insurance needs might be eliminated by anyone in a bind. Sell an extra car & be up a few $$$$ for awhile, be a good steward with any and all extra money coming in. Each 5mph you slow down saves 7% gas burned, 10mph means a 14% savings at the pump EVERY time. So if you wake early enough not to be rushing to work you'll save $$$ here today too.......

I don't claim to know it all but have been through every personal dilemma listed above w/the exception of tobacco, I broke and/or altered as many costly (money & health) habits as I could over a long period of time at my own pace & as I was able to recognize them as problematic to my moving forward.

No you can't break or change every costly habit at once unless you really need too to live on in your present situation. Take a real account of how each of these costly ways or habits above effects you and your income and families well being. If you're suffering from this economy then see what changes above might fit into an effort you'd like to make in keeping more of what you earn.

I had a stroke yrs ago & so long posts like this usually take me in excess of an hour or two to complete so I'm beat by now. I don't think I've touched on anything new or novel above but hope that some of you in need of finding a few extra $$$ every month might prosper by what I've said anyway. Through many yrs of depression and too many hardships I always took the outlook that better days are coming, some of those days were met by an S4L that was ready for them and for other times I still was not. I hope all of us find success in meeting and beating the tough times ahead.



peace
~S4L~

 

[og dmc]

Thats some good avice s4l.

 

[Guest]

I don't know what to say but thank you. I smoked and then went and did some yardwork...... like polishing the grass on the titanic but at least it'll look nice.


okwildfire Thanks man!

rootfingers Embrace the change ..... good advice!

Navigator330 I;m glad that you licked that problem thanks for the well wishes.

Danger Mouse Thanks for the offer and relating your story. It really does help. Trust me.

dank.frank I'm glad you shared that. There is always someone with it worse. I have friends that get life like that in their ass all the time. Hard to watch when you know they are really trying.

My problems? I tend to think are my fault. I tried and I failed yeah? But..... I'm still here and I still got her and that's what matters most.

 

[Guest]

I appreciate the advice I really do. We are not a couple that indulges in frivolities. We did the cost cutting thing in the last year and it helped. We eat once a day and it's home cooked vegetarian. Can't afford the meat. Canceled cable. Canceled garbage and take ours to a neighbor. No processed foods no packed meals, no eating out. No home phone, no turning the gas heat on.... we turned the smallest room in the house into a living room because we can heat it for $1 a day with a small space heater.

We moved to a house 1/3rd the size we were living in and were selling the old. Only problem was this economy hit and no one at any price was buying around here. Tried renting but they all flaked and here we are paying mortgages. Not credit cards or anything like that. Just mortgages and utilities. If I could think of one thing I spend money on beside pot I would say it. I haven't bought clothes in a year.

No money for it. We drive cheap cars and have always saved but it runs out. You keep thinking if you hold on 1 more month you'll be able to save it.

After the bills are paid we have $300 for the month. $60 of that goes to food the rest to gas and dog food.

We didn't get into some fancy 100% mortgage or anything like that..... just a string of bad ideas and bad timing.

I'd offer advice like scaling down & moving into something very affordable on a monthly basis but it sounds like you're pressed for time/money and that usually doesn't leave the option of taking the time for cashing out of the current situation (worse in this lousy economy) if you can't keep the wolf from the door in the meanwhile.

Believe me bro I'm not chastising or accusing you of this but too many people enjoy living at the edge or just beyond their means, a rough patch in the road might then mean a small adjustment but in this economy it will be causing homelessness at rates rivaling the Great Depression.

Any time I use the word YOU below I'm not refering to anyone in particular here but am addressing any and all that fall into the parameters of failing financially and having costly and/or bad habits. Some people (myself especially) tend to have addictive personality traits and need to practice moderation or suffer from not having enough money and energy to live on. With the exception of tobacco I've had to break or profoundly change every one of these habits I've listed below myself.

I surely don't have all the answers but daily habits can be awfully expensive and are often the first that require adjusting. Bottled water, soda, coffee shop coffees, meals prepared out of the home, potato chips (@$3.79 for 9oz that's $6.73 per pound), and finally (imo) here's the kicker that will finish off the weak willed....... They can't/won't give up their vices & will usually immerse themselves farther into them therefore abusing them more, booze & tobacco products. Buying those uber-expensive energy drinks because it helps you through the day? Fuck that shit! go home & get to bed earlier (that'll save you $$$), take care of yourself better, buy some vitamins & take them this time....... I stopped drinking yrs ago but continued to go out to the bars drinking diet pop & shootin' pool, still cost me too much money & energy, now I consider it a treat to do so only a night or two each month in the winter only. btw I do have a six plus month winter up here.

Booze & tobacco will cost you more down the line, you might blame that cold/flu and a few days missed work as lousy luck but you'd not want to blame your brew & cigs for breaking down your immune system on a permanent basis, it'd be the truth. Studies have found that the combination of liquor & tobacco compound the ill effects of each if you use them both, I trust most of these studies as they go AGAINST big business interests and are w/o an agenda as they tend to profit nobody except a person that takes the advice to quit.

If a person seeks lifestyle changes and has some/all of the habits above then usually it's easy to address these over time, one at a time, it can better be accomplished this way. But if the wolfes at the door as a lot of people/families are going under every day now then breaking those costly habits all at once if possible makes more sense as the savings are immediate.

I've eliminated a lot of daily fixes above in the food department and those have to be replaced in some cases. Tang and Kool-Aid are good affordable substitutes for sweet bevs. Buy a Britta or PuR water pitcher to remove tap water impurities, I LOVE the cold fresh clean (& pure as tested by a lab) water from my 375' deep well but I filter it anyway. Instead of trying to replace those chips just limit yourself to a single ounce serving as suggested on the bag, I never eat more than that myself and I've found that's plenty for the side dish of a meal. ENERGY drinks, as a species we've existed w/o them for thousands of yrs, wtf makes them so in demand now? Poor daily/nightly habits is what. If you're living on energy drinks it's likely because you're burning the candle at both ends, anytime you leave your home you're spending $$ unless you're walking and doing shit that's 100% free. Stay home get the right amount of sleep, do better at work with REAL clarity & NOT caffinated edginess, who knows you might keep that job and get a raise if your performance improves. Getting more sleep means being able to wake earlier to make a brown bag lunch is possible, tastes better, more nutricious, cheaper.

Go ahead and do the math yourself, only you know how much you spend on items that can be eliminated from your daily routine. Work 20 days a month? eliminate $7-10 per day there from food habits alone & that's $150-200 per month, if your significant other works too & you can eliminate that amount again we're looking at a nice chunk of your rent or all of your utility bills.

Spend the $35 for a Sam's club membership and shop WISELY with it. I love boneless skinless chicken thighs as my chix meat, at the local market it's over $4.29per lb, @ Sam's club I pay $2.09per lb whan I buy it by the 40# case, yes I have a chest freezer.

I live in the country & buy my beef from a neighbor, I fucking LAUGH @ the $9.79 per lb price for rib eye steaks & $3.00 ground beef in the market, I pay appx $1.40 - 1.75per lb for a side of beef, this includes every cut & roast from the side & many #s of high quality ground beef, I can assure you it's tastier than store bought beef. You might live in the city but can take a drive into the country, go to where you usually see beef cattle grazing & knock on that farmers door, be polite & humble looking and enquire about a side or 1/2 side purchase depending on your $$$ & freezer space. Offer to come back & be there to handle, wrap and mark that beef, the farmer always butchers, you can package that meat in small or lg packs depending on family size. I'm single and do a LOT of wrapping of individual meal sized packages. A small chest freezer @ Sam's Club is less than $200 & will pay for itself the first time you fill it on the cheap, Energy Star efficient it will not cost much to run.

Other things that'll save money today? I can afford my cell phone as I have a $35 plan and I never excede my limits, extra cars w/insurance needs might be eliminated by anyone in a bind. Sell an extra car & be up a few $$$$ for awhile, be a good steward with any and all extra money coming in. Each 5mph you slow down saves 7% gas burned, 10mph means a 14% savings at the pump EVERY time. So if you wake early enough not to be rushing to work you'll save $$$ here today too.......

I don't claim to know it all but have been through every personal dilemma listed above w/the exception of tobacco, I broke and/or altered as many costly (money & health) habits as I could over a long period of time at my own pace & as I was able to recognize them as problematic to my moving forward.

No you can't break or change every costly habit at once unless you really need too to live on in your present situation. Take a real account of how each of these costly ways or habits above effects you and your income and families well being. If you're suffering from this economy then see what changes above might fit into an effort you'd like to make in keeping more of what you earn.

I had a stroke yrs ago & so long posts like this usually take me in excess of an hour or two to complete so I'm beat by now. I don't think I've touched on anything new or novel above but hope that some of you in need of finding a few extra $$$ every month might prosper by what I've said anyway. Through many yrs of depression and too many hardships I always took the outlook that better days are coming, some of those days were met by an S4L that was ready for them and for other times I still was not. I hope all of us find success in meeting and beating the tough times ahead.



peace
~S4L~

 

[NOKUY]

sorry to hear about the hardtimes jack....S4L as usual offers great advice.

ive never lost everything due to circumstances other than me saying fuck it and moving 4000 miles away w/ nothing but what we could haul w/ truck or van and a trailer ....(done it 3 times)...and would be glad to do it again.

but thats my stuborness w/ not wanting to play w/ society.

in my situation now i am low on the seniority pole in a new field for me (natural gas)....and even tho its prolly one of the better (more secure) areas to be it still doesnt mean i dont think about "what if" i got laid off or something. (it would be different if it wasnt my choice)

i have almost $20,000 in the bank, but that wouldent last me very long if i didnt have a big paycheck coming in every 2 weeks. (thats like 7 paychecks).

it's why i'm trying to buy my property in alaska, and have it paid off, and set up so i could actually live there w/ next to nothing if i had to, and when i want to.

it's one reason i brought up the whole "are you prepared" thread which i will bump in a min. in case you or others have not seen it......lots of good things in that thread.

i wish you the best of luck in getting out of your dilema....im sure you will (tuff times dont last...tuff people do)

good luck bro!

 

[Crazy Composer]

The less you have, the easier to keep what you have. Don't worry.

 

[ureapwhatusow]

itis always darkest before the dawn

as tough as it is

A) It will improve

B) success or failure is relative

to keep negativity from gaining momentum I suggest you try to focus on the postives and learn to view this change fro an opportunistic standpoint instead of a pessimistic viewpoint

very difficult to do, but in the end the laws of attraction have bearing in effecting the hear and now

these are trying times, i hope you happen upon something that makes this all worthwhile

 

[RudolfTheRed]

I've been in similar situations before. I lived on the streets for a number of years and know what hard times can bring. I can stretch money out like no body else. I lived (almost) entirely off dumpster food for a couple years. Most people think this is gross but i ate like a king (2-4 meals a day) even when I had no money. I found all sorts of meats, vegetables, fruits, etc. all still packaged and the only reason it was thrown out was because it was ready to expire (some things were past the sell date but the food was still good, just inspect it first). Never got sick once and anyone else who would dumpster dive with me didn't get sick either.
Any doubters out there need to drive to the back of there local supermarket and take a look. Organic stores like Trader Joe's and Whole Foods would leave the food in boxes for people to take instead of putting it in the dumpster. All I had to do was ask for them to do it. Most organic stores don't mind.
i still go dumpster diving even though i don't need to as much these days. i leave the food for people whom really need it. i'm as healthy as an ox and haven't been sick in years.
i got a few other scams out there for obtaining free food but those are a lot riskier and no need to share them because i still use em myself


anyone who has worked at a super market will tell you the same exact thing.... perfectly, good, packaged food is thrown out every day

 

[Haps]

Think of it as time in the forge. Reform, and grow stronger for it, pain can feed strength and growth, but you must learn this in the forge. It is up to you.
H