Message to Americans from John Cleese

[-StashBastard-]

Ahh yeah...nothing more fun that icmags daily game of kick the Americans in the nuts...

yeah...

 

[Pops]

That is what we get for being the new kids on the block.

 

[VictoryGardener]

Gypsy you better not close this thread before I get my post in... that has happened twice today and the wall has a new dent in it.


This letter from John Cleese is funny... The man is right... Americans can't elect a good candidate...

It is funny to me, that an overwhelming majority of Americans have absolutely no problem complaining on and on about whoever the current president is and his administration.... yet when it is time to actually elect a president, most Americans couldn't give a rat's ass.. that is... if they are actually voting....

If Americans can't spend the time to inform themselves about ALL the candidates and actually VOTE for a good candidate, then they have no right to yap 24 hours a day about why the current president sucks.... the man that THEY VOTED INTO OFFICE.

America DESERVES the warmonger that knows about as much about economics as a third grader or the socialists on the democrat side.... or the Bible thumper fascist that uses religion to win the evangelical vote.
America deserves who they vote for. And I hope at least a few of em remember that THEY voted for the man sittin in the White House when they do their complaining a few years from now... when the whole country has gone to SHIT.

America doesn't deserve a man like Ron Paul. Such a pity.

 

[greenhead]

This letter from John Cleese is funny... The man is right... Americans can't elect a good candidate...

The letter is not from John Cleese. I like John Cleese, and as soon as I read that letter, which is an old fraud, I knew that it was a hoax.

 

[daisy jane]

Haha! Gotta love John Cleese and Monty Python

 

[Pops]

Strange how we Yanks pick assholes and the Brits pick folks who immediately stick their noses up those assholes. Seems that we both need to select better leaders, but I don't want to go political here and get the thread banned. I would rather post nudity and get it banned.

 

[la resistance]

great read, pretty funny.

If Americans can't spend the time to inform themselves about ALL the candidates and actually VOTE for a good candidate, then they have no right to yap 24 hours a day about why the current president sucks.... the man that THEY VOTED INTO OFFICE.

electoral college elects the president, not us

 

[Pops]

The letter may be a fraud, but it is still funny. American football is great but needs a few changes. Get rid of the pads and helmet and put 200 pounds of armor on and give them swords and battleaxes. Why just pretend to be gladiators when you can be the real thing? Might need to get socialized medicine to take care of all the battle injuries. Insurance companies wouldn't like to foot the bill!

 

[TopoftheTree]

....yeah but Christiano Ronaldo is Portugese.......try playing Vinnie Jones in that quarterback position.....

very true, but since he's on the English version of the New York Yankees I figured we could make an acception. I wasn't trying to say nfl football is tougher by any means, but given that he's such a pussy I would find it funny to watch.

 

[Echoes]

I remember seeing this years ago in some AOL email forward. Anyway, yeah, still pretty funny.

15. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

16. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's
Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies
due (backdated to 1776).

Hilarious.

 

[VictoryGardener]

great read, pretty funny.




electoral college elects the president, not us

if you want to be technical about it, sure... but that doesn't mean that we don't share in the responsibility. I sure feel like I am partly responsible for who gets elected.


You know I used to think that this was the rule-
"Nothing is more powerful than an idea whose time has come."

Either Ron Paul's ideas haven't come, or the news media is far too powerful... maybe a little bit of both. I thought nothing could stop Dr. Paul... and that every American would see the bullshit in all of the other candidates and all would vote for Ron.. I guess not!

 

[cooked cook]

hehehe...funny stuff.

I for one welcome our British overlords.

This will work out well as I already drive on the left side of the road, and it seems to piss off people here in the US

 

[-ShutterBug-]

This is not a very nice thread and am kind of insulted but then again.​

 

[Pops]

If we Americans are insulted when folks make fun of our stupidity then, possibly, we should stop being stupid. Might work. Should we give it a chance?

 

[greenhead]

If we Americans are insulted when folks make fun of our stupidity then, possibly, we should stop being stupid. Might work. Should we give it a chance?

People are allowed to make fun of our stupidity, as long as we are allowed to make fun of everybody else's stupidity. That sounds fair to me.

 

[trouble]

14. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host
an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of
America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your
borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will
let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their
deliveries.

Cricket is the only sport to be named after an insect. It is the only sport next to Scoccer in which spectators have been known to die of boredom and old age during the match. It is the only competitive activity of any type, other than perhaps Baking Cookies, in which one dresses in white from head to toe and be as clean at the end of compitition as in the beginning.

Imagine a batter wearing a riding hat, heavy gloves of the sort used to handle radioactive isotopes, and a mattress attached to each leg. Imagine moreover if the batsman fails to hit the ball in a way that satisfies him sufficently to waddle sixty feet with matresses strapped to each his legs, he is under no compulsion to run and may stand there all day and, more often than not, does.

If by some miricle he is coaxed into making a mistake that leads to him being put out, all the fielders throw-up their arms in victory and have a group hug. Imagine all of this going on for so long that by the time the match concludes another Christmas has come and passed and Library Books are overdue. There you have Cricket!




....

 

[Pops]

And a fine game it is! K+ trouble.

 

[Guest]

Do they get bathroom breaks, trouble? Or do they wear Depends like me?

 

[trouble]

13. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of
proper football; you call it soccer.

Scoccer is still the most boring sport in the world next to Cricket. Dont get all mad, I'm just another dumb-ass American that doesnt get it!

So, lets say you have two great Scoccer teams, so great that they can only score once against each other during a given time period. Thats real exciting! If it were a basketball game the crowd would be ripe with anticipation. The cool thing about American Football, Basketball, and Baseball is that they play untill someone wins! They dont just stop playing, sit the teams down, and have a shoot-out.

But apperantly this is what happens to decide the supposed biggest sport in the world.

Thats right....England wins over France but not as a team. They won because it was time to stop the game and kick the ball at each others goalie untill the idiot French goalie mistook the ball for a WWII German Soldier and dove out of the way!

There you have Scoccer.....



.....

 

[Guest]

As a proud Frenchman I take great offence to that statement trouble.