"Friends" betrayal

[Huey69]

I'm just wondering, has anyone else lost "friends" due to smoking?

For the last couple of months my "friends" havn't been giving me a call or text or anything to hang out. I've repeatedly tried with multiple friends(different friends, same group of friends though) to hang out, only to either not be responded to, told something might be going on and will be given details later only to not get them, or just told i dunno.
Now, becuase of all this...I got kind of depressed (which I havn't told anyone, it's all just bullshit in my head, and I know that so I'm not letting it get to me). My best friend finally got back from school a couple days ago, which has been good and all saw alot of my "friends" last night when we had a little get together.
I talked to one friend who is also experiencing the same thing(he doesn't smoke though) and he told me the reason that my "friends" stopped hitting me up is becuase "I smoke too much and I changed and am an asshole all the time and talk shit"
This is just complete bullshit. I will admit I might smoke a bit more then I should (probably around half a gram a day+hash), but I don't feel that I should be critized for that when they drink 2+ times a week and make complete ass's of themselves. The only way I feel that I have changed is that I rarely drink anymore, I smoke before I go out (so it's not like i'm even smoking around these people), and the only "shit" I've talked is stating facts about people(i.e making an ass of themselves, getting kicked out of houses for stupid shit, etc). The worst part is, these people act like they're my best friends when they see me!!!!
I realize it might not be worth it to bother with these people anymore...but it's still something that bothers me greatly...I mean, I'm the guy who was dumped because I was too nice.

 

[GET MO]

"Fuck Friendz"..... This is real talk. I dont have or want any. lots of people wanna be my friend but them walls don't come down. been with my girl six years and she just finally gettin ta know me. If you aint family then you are an aquantance. 'Fuck friends, they all hatchou in the end, n!&%as fake and they wanna pretend..'

 

[trouble]

I mean, I'm the guy who was dumped because I was too nice.

I believe it's a normal reaction to place blame on others when we get hurt by them. That way we dont have to change our behavior, they do! I'm not saying that you are not a nice person, however, try taking a hard honest look at yourself and why all your friends feel this way towards you. If one person calls you duck, you can let it slide. However, if several people say your a duck theres a good chance your quaking and a duck. Just try to take an honest look at yourself and see where you may have given them reason to feel this way. And then if you still feel that it's their fault and not yours, then fuckem, find some new friends.




........................................................................................................

 

[B4O2N0G]

I seem to go through this problem every year.Its really just people doing different things..talking to different people.I really hate it though like im sure you do however I still have a handfull of people I chill and talk with which have always been my real friends.

The people who are around 1 year and gone the next are not your friends.I dont like the people who drink every weekend and act like fools either.These people who drink and think you are a bad person for smoking weed are simply fools.They will find themselves in jail for driving intoxicated and killin someone while im sitting here smoking weed safely in my house with my friends.

It is the governments fault for making alcohol look good and marijuana evil.However we the pot smokers will always know who the good people really are and its not some intoxicated kid driving into a wall or some girl too drunk to know who shes having sex with.

 

[Reeffermadness]

Good Real friends are hard to come by. Try finding friends that are more into smoking.

 

[ureapwhatusow]

If they were really your friends they woud have confronted you because they wanted to salvage the relationship or were concerned about how you were changing

sounds liek the minute you presented them with discomfort they blew you off

they sound to "fair weather" to be real friends

deviating from the norm will sometimes leave you feeling on the outside.

Pretending to be someone you are not to fit in will make you feel shallow and empty so let go of the loss

 

[charliemurphy]

I agree, true friends would never just give up on you and move on. Either they need to get their crap together or its time for you find some people that you really connect with, instead of just trying to fit in.

 

[GDB]

Time to find some real "friends" the kind you can criticise and they won't turn their back on you. I know too many people with too many "friends" when the true ones can barely add up on one hand. These people sound like your everyday average acquaintances.. selfish and self serving as they come.

 

[James-Bong]

^^^my two best friends.......

 

[CheifnBud2]

Your friends are assholes, find new ones if they dont wanna chill with you and you need people around you.

BTW that vaporizer is killer, but you dont like the bags? Attatchment looks sweet aswell.

 

[zeeba amoeba]

I'm just wondering, has anyone else lost "friends" due to smoking?

For the last couple of months my "friends" havn't been giving me a call or text or anything to hang out. I've repeatedly tried with multiple friends(different friends, same group of friends though) to hang out, only to either not be responded to, told something might be going on and will be given details later only to not get them, or just told i dunno.
Now, becuase of all this...I got kind of depressed (which I havn't told anyone, it's all just bullshit in my head, and I know that so I'm not letting it get to me). My best friend finally got back from school a couple days ago, which has been good and all saw alot of my "friends" last night when we had a little get together.
I talked to one friend who is also experiencing the same thing(he doesn't smoke though) and he told me the reason that my "friends" stopped hitting me up is becuase "I smoke too much and I changed and am an asshole all the time and talk shit"
This is just complete bullshit. I will admit I might smoke a bit more then I should (probably around half a gram a day+hash), but I don't feel that I should be critized for that when they drink 2+ times a week and make complete ass's of themselves. The only way I feel that I have changed is that I rarely drink anymore, I smoke before I go out (so it's not like i'm even smoking around these people), and the only "shit" I've talked is stating facts about people(i.e making an ass of themselves, getting kicked out of houses for stupid shit, etc). The worst part is, these people act like they're my best friends when they see me!!!!
I realize it might not be worth it to bother with these people anymore...but it's still something that bothers me greatly...I mean, I'm the guy who was dumped because I was too nice.

There was a short story by Paul Bowles I really liked called "The Story of Lahcen and Idir," in which he writes,

"The difference between Lahcen and Idir was that Lahcen liked to drink and Idir smoked kif. Kif smokers want to stay quiet in their heads, and drinkers are not like that. They want to break things."

I have found this to be true as well. Drinkers are on a much different wavelength than us. You wouldn't find too many fights breaking out in a marijuana-only bar.

 

[Huey69]

Trouble: This has been going on since February...I've tried assessing myself from all different angles...and there is only one person I can think of that I've been an "asshole" to or "talked shit about" and that's my 28 year old brother-in-laws-brother. He hangs out with my group of friends(mostly 18-20 year olds...some a little younger, some a little older) and really is one of the main reasons I stopped drinking. He has been kicked out of multiples houses(including mine..), makes an ass of himself everytime he drinks, tries to start fights(again, has tried with me), and generally tries to be a hardass...but the dude has mental problems, but everyone prefers to hang out with him over me(which could just be becuase he can buy them booze, I cant). I'm not trying to pawn this off on him...but really thats the only thing I can really think of. There's more to it of course..but..ya..

To Everyone else: Thanks for the advice. I've been trying to hang out with different people, it's just hard sometimes because everyone already has their "groups." I have a few friends to smoke with, but even then it's sometimes hard to hang out with them due to conflicting schedules.

Jamesbong: Ya...definitely good friends haha

There was a short story by Paul Bowles I really liked called "The Story of Lahcen and Idir," in which he writes,

"The difference between Lahcen and Idir was that Lahcen liked to drink and Idir smoked kif. Kif smokers want to stay quiet in their heads, and drinkers are not like that. They want to break things."

I have found this to be true as well. Drinkers are on a much different wavelength than us. You wouldn't find too many fights breaking out in a marijuana-only bar.

I think i'm going to add that quote to my sig. It's so true.

 

[Guest]

I know what you mean

I know what you mean

AS you get older you realize that alot of what u thought were ur friends are just people u knew not friends. Friends are few and far between.Most people just want something from and I mean not hang out. Who needs friends when u have family.

 

[DrKong]

i've had friends steal and rob me because they see pot and want it all for themselves.

 

[CarlWeathers]

I guess I am just lucky enough to have had the same core group of friends since I was in 2nd grade. I'm 21 now and a lot of those guys are as big if not bigger tokers than I. We as a group have defriended people, but it is always over something that will not and cannot be resolved.

Like others have said these people obviously don't care about you so why in turn should you do the same.

 

[SoulCoughing]

A handful of friends is more than you need. Get a best buddy or 2 and everybody else is almost a stranger. People are judgemental and stupid. Get smarter friends or focus your energy into a hobby, like growing more weed to smoke. Family is always there, friends will rat you out the moment something goes down. Also, I've run into the same thing when I stopped partying and drinking every weekend and just replaced it with smoking. People called me an addict...excuse me.... but you drink poison every chance you get. I smoke something that is anti-cancer and anti-depressing. Just because it's legal just means it is taxed and will most likely give you brain retardation and or cancer and kill you. True friends are rare and hard to come by, they're the type of people who come bail you out or visit you even when you live 10 hours away. They are few and far between and don't ever turn their back on you. Get new friends, or a best friend.

Best of luck,
SC

 

[RudolfTheRed]

If they drink and make asses of themselves why do you even want to hang out with them?

I used to drink all the time & make an ass of myself and I wouldn't want to hang out with me either looking back.

Fuck 'em, fuck friends.

I've got friends but honestly I don't like being around them for to long. I just get annoyed by people when I am around them to much. If I am smoking weed I like to be around people even less. In fact, I only like smoking or being stoned around certain people otherwise I just hate it. My friends know this.

 

[SCF]

i got out of a 6 + year relationship. Had some great friends for 12 + years. Most of them the opposite sex but that ment nothing. When we broke up, and left for homeless and all my stuff stolen. I had maybe 1 friend out of 10 good ones call me to ask how im doing. Its been about a year now and the rest have never called me.


My ex lied up a fucking storm and they believed her. They where not true friends obviously. Its sad to have hardly any friends now. but I'm much better off in the long run believe me.


they really are replaceable, you just have to find people you click with. Growing older you grow apart from people.

Good luck.
SCF

 

[pseudostelariae]

shitty friends are all over the place...i've known a girl her whole life and we both started to smoke..i even taught her and her boyfriend to grow, gave them clones, smoked them out..for awhile i would have to run over every few days to tell them they're plants are fine, just maybe a little over watered or need some food. now i don't even have my calls returned because i'm between harvests. it seems like most people just want something from you..thats what relationships are based off of.

you need to find people that you want to be around because they make you feel good and you have fun. maybe there are a few around..i know i've got two

 

[Don Cotyle]

You can pick your friends, some family is wished on ya!!! LOL Don't even bother with them,a true friend will give you a call and ask where you've been, if your allright, if you want to hang out! Most "friends" will only call you when they need something, can I borrow your truck, tools, etc. and then you don't hear from them again till they need something from you. They are aquaintences, not your friends. If your trying not to drink or just don't like it anymore you don't need em around anyway!!! You'll make new friends,many many aquaintences but only a few true friends!!!!! I can count my friends on one hand, and my "friends"(not) I don't have enough fingers and toes!!!

Get a good hobby and you'll make a few friends! Buy the way a half gram and some hash a day isn't smokeing too much...really!!!!

Good luck in your search, it would be better to become closer with your family than hang out with loosers! I also remember you saying you were accused of talking about friends makeing assholes of them selves, I don't know if your guilty of that or not! If someone tells you something in confidence keep it that way!!!!! and don't gossip or spread sh!t, even your best friends won't enjoy that, it you do talk about others , everyone will think you talk about them also!!! I'm not trying to break your balls here, just some constructive critisum!!!

Peace Don!