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Old 04-23-2016, 03:26 PM #1
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Talking Weird - Wacky - Funny News

Every state and nation has unusual people and unusual headlines. Post your favorites here with comments and a link to the full story.
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Old 04-23-2016, 03:29 PM #2
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Eugene pet store owner used primate as payment to a prostitute, police say

Man allegedly gave out-of-area prostitute money, and tipped her by giving her a Galago primate

An exotic primate is safe after the owner of a Eugene pet store used it as payment for a sexual encounter with a prostitute, Eugene police said Friday.

In early March, Eugene police received two reports of burglaries at the Zany Zoo Pets store on Commerce Street in west Eugene. A laptop computer, Girl Scout cookie money and a Galago primate named Gooey were reported stolen from the store.

But a Eugene Police Department investigation revealed the store’s owner, Nathan Allen McClain, paid an out-of-town prostitute with store money, including the Girl Scout cash, and tipped the prostitute for her services by presenting her with the animal, police said.

In the course of investigating the alleged burglaries, investigators discovered the prostitute’s identity after viewing surveillance video from businesses near Zany Zoo, Eugene police Detective Rick Lowe said. One video showed the prostitute in the area of the store in March. Lowe said he tracked her down at a Springfield motel on March 17, and she cooperated, returning the primate from her Portland home and explaining what had happened.
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Old 04-23-2016, 06:36 PM #3
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US Military Introduce Childbomber McChildbombface
April 18, 2016
AN online poll conducted by the US Air Force to name their newest MQ-1 Predator drone has resulted in the $4m aircraft being christened “Childbomber McChildbombface”, it has emerged.

The comical monicker was chosen ahead of the preferred names “Freedom Machine” and “Liberty Fire”, and moves made by the US AF to block the use of Childbomber McChildbombface were thwarted by a vicious online backlash.

The Childbomber McChildbombface fiasco mirrors the naming of the newest Royal Research Ship, which was saddled with “Boaty McBoatface” by hilarious people online.

“If they’re going to deploy this weapon overseas despite widespread criticism of the drone programme, then at least we should get to name it,” said one member of the Childbomber McChildbombface campaign.

“We wish we could have named it Nocollateralhumandamage McNocollateralhumandamageface, but like the drones themselves, that’s just not accurate”.

Childbomber McChildbombface is already operational in the Middle East, and so far has lived up to his name and then some.
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Old 04-23-2016, 08:07 PM #4
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Florida Man claims dolphin 'seduced' him into having 'sex'

A Florida-based man, who had sex with Dolly the dolphin in a year-long "relationship" in 1971, has revealed that it only happened because she " seduced" him.

In a new 15 minute documentary, the 63-year-old Malcolm Brenner, from Punta Garda, said that he started rubbing her along her back, working her way to her flukes, her tail and as he was rubbing her and moving her hand towards her tail, Dolly was slowly rolling around her long axis, the Mirror reported.

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Old 04-23-2016, 09:07 PM #5
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SPOKANE RESIDENTS SPEND MORE MONEY ON CANNABIS THAN BREAD, WINE OR MILK
By Bernie Canter - Apr 13, 2016

In one Washington county, legal marijuana is the literally hottest thing since sliced bread.

Spokane, Washington, people spent more of their hard-earned cash on legal cannabis in 2015 than they did on bread, wine, or milk. The county reportedly spent a shade over $43 million according to data compiled by the state’s Liquor and Cannabis Board.

Those numbers translate to an average of $225.64 spent on marijuana per household in 2015. Conversely, beer barely beat out cannabis with $232.70 per household.

Thereafter, it was all Kush as wine sales averaged $154.85 per household, milk sales averaged $155.37 and bread sales averaged $109.71. Those figures come courtesy of the Census Bureau.

The big takeaway here is that as America becomes healthier and eschews liquor, fast food, and sugar for a healthier lifestyle, marijuana has cemented itself as part of that healthy lifestyle. And that’s only going up.
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Old 04-23-2016, 09:21 PM #6
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SPOKANE RESIDENTS SPEND MORE MONEY ON CANNABIS THAN BREAD, WINE OR MILK
By Bernie Canter - Apr 13, 2016

In one Washington county, legal marijuana is the literally hottest thing since sliced bread.

Spokane, Washington, people spent more of their hard-earned cash on legal cannabis in 2015 than they did on bread, wine, or milk. The county reportedly spent a shade over $43 million according to data compiled by the state’s Liquor and Cannabis Board.

Those numbers translate to an average of $225.64 spent on marijuana per household in 2015. Conversely, beer barely beat out cannabis with $232.70 per household.

Thereafter, it was all Kush as wine sales averaged $154.85 per household, milk sales averaged $155.37 and bread sales averaged $109.71. Those figures come courtesy of the Census Bureau.

The big takeaway here is that as America becomes healthier and eschews liquor, fast food, and sugar for a healthier lifestyle, marijuana has cemented itself as part of that healthy lifestyle. And that’s only going up.
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Old 04-23-2016, 09:24 PM #7
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Florida man.............

for those wondering why florida man is always getting in to crazy situations.

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...it is the policy of this state that all state, county, and municipal records shall at all times be open for a personal inspection by any person.
— Fla. Stat. sec. 119.01(1) (1995)
makes life pretty easy for journos

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Old 04-23-2016, 11:05 PM #8
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SML..iff mi spellin and centances suk and yoo don't lyke itt too fukkin bad;/?.....I once was asked what I would say upon getting to the gates of heaven??? m/r is a visitors badge an option??? I would like a few drinks at the bar... YEEHAW....vote for real legalization not sum bullshit...free the weed or kiss my ass...you wont be getting my tax money..
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Old 04-24-2016, 04:44 AM #9
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Cops: Auto Repair Boss Paid Employees in Crystal Meth

Minnesota drug agents raided an auto repair shop after an employee complained that bonus pay was delivered in the form of crystal meth.

The Minnesota River Valley Drug Task Force conducted a lengthy investigation of Clear Choice Auto Repair before Thursday's bust, according to a statement.

Jesse Michael Seifert, 40, allegedly watched as his girlfriend, Nancy Jean Loehlein, 39, distributed a haf-gram of meth to each employee at a Wednesday night company meeting, the statement said.

Authorities found syringes and a digital scale that tested positive for meth, the task force said.

Seifert was arrested on suspicion of driving with a cancelled license, the statement said, and is in custody. The investigation is ongoing and more charges are pending, officials said. No other details were released.

https://www.msn.com/en-ca/news/offbea...eth/ar-BBs6nZQ
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Old 04-24-2016, 01:15 PM #10
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Female Ted Cruz Lookalike Agrees To Do Porn For $10,000

Her boyfriend — and future costar — is proud: “She’s more famous than Madonna!”



Last Sunday, Searcy Hayes was an unknown 21-year-old from Natchez, Mississippi.

By Monday night, she was a viral sensation after viewers of the Maury Povich show decided she was the female doppelganger of Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz.

Hayes went on the show after her fiance, 25-year-old Freddie Green, accused her of cheating on him. All was resolved in typical Maury fashion when she passed a lie detector test and DNA results showed her 3-month-old son was Green’s.

Since the appearance, numerous websites have printed side-by-side photos showing Hayes next to Cruz.

Amazingly, Hayes had never heard of Cruz before the resemblance was pointed out to her and she still knows little about him.

“I don’t know his positions and I’ve never seen him, so I don’t know if he’s done a good enough job to be reelected,” she told The Huffington Post.

When we pointed out that Cruz isn’t actually president, just a candidate, she said, “Well, yeah, I don’t know anything about him.”

Hayes has had such a big impact that Povich did a special Facebook interview with her.

“We want to buy a truck, pay off our house and we might get married,” he says. “I never had anyone say, ‘Here’s $10,000! Go make a sex tape.’”

Green admits he’s excited by Hayes’ newfound fame.

“It’s kind of exciting and shocking to know she’s famous — she’s more famous than Madonna!” he said. “I’m with a star.”
https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/...ref=weird-news
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