[ParadigmShift]

Golden BC---Exit Before Calgary AB
Exit After Calgary AB---Strathmore AB
Brooks AB---Medicine Hat AB
Winnipeg MB---Truck Stop After Winnipeg MB
Richer MB---Thunder Bay ONT
Barrie ONT---Windsor ONT

Total hours = 72 Hours
Total distance hitch hiked = 3,036 Kilometers
Budget = $50
A man survives just fine off coffee and Gummy Bears...
I managed to hitch hike across 5 Provinces with $50 for my expenses, I spent quite a bit more then that simply by buying the drivers their meals along the way for their warm hospitality.
Total cost adds up to around $220 because got grey hound bus from Barrie to Windsor cost $96

Tip #1
While hitch hiking anywhere.
If at all possible, if your hitchin' East always try to get dropped off on the East end of the city/town that you are traveling through.
On my journey I have walked no less then 60-80 Kilometers most of which was Late in the night some of it through white-out snow storm conditions. Just to get to the nearest truck stop so I can begin hitch hikin'.

When I began my journey, I assumed that I wouldn't meet to many difficulties along the way...
I figured that Northern Ontario heading South would be my biggest obstacle for me landing a ride. I was wrong. Nothing was further from the truth...
I also assumed that my main means of travel would be with truck drivers, again I was wrong. Not a single trucker offered me a ride to travel along...

I did encounter weirdos.
I had a driver pick me up on an exit just East of Calgary Alberta, very nice gentle soft spoken man. He explained to me that he was heading to Winnipeg to finalize his divorce with his wife.
This was nice, I had figured he was my god send for picking me up and out of a snow blizzard and taking me all this way to Winnipeg...
20 minutes into our conversation he hits me with a surprise left, not literally. But he drops a bomb on me. He sneakingly offers to perform falacio on me!!! Keep in mind I'm tanked from my last ride through the city and it is white-out conditions. At this point I'm trying to balance everything out in my head, weighing the pros and cons. Who would ever know right, that kind of shit...
I tell him that his request has just put a HUGE dent in my comfort level for traveling with him any further and if kind enough to just drop me off at the next truck stop...
So, this ride ended fairly quickly, back at it in the snow storm...


Earlier I was trying to hitch a ride from an exit just West of Calgary. 2 indians stop to pick me up, both drunk as a skunk.
They tell me it is almost impossible to hitch a ride where I'm at and that I would be far better off to take a city bus, then a train, then city bus again to take me to the East end of Calgary. Over 2-3 hours to get to the other end or give them $20 and they would happily take me there.
I accept,
I give them $20 they feed me with beers and tell me they will pray for my safe arrival to my final destination. A short time later, maybe 45 minutes or so, I too am highly intoxicated...
Life is good, this snow storm is not...calling for 6" of snow...wet snow...So I'm dropped off at an exit East of Calgary and begin hitchin' once again...

Now fast foward to Thunder Bay. I'm at the airport trying to book a flight to Windsor, London, Hamilton, Toronto. I don't give a fuck nomore right, I have not sleeped 1 minute all this way, I smell like straight ass and what the fuck right, I hitched 5 Provinces, something I had always wanted to do, and I did it. Now I just want to see my bedside and get some tail when I get home to my wife. I'm trying to orchestrate this flight between a few hard to reach people in SouthWestern Ontario and my Uncle in Edmonton.
I get everything worked out with my peeps and I'm in line to reserve a seat on the next plane out heading south, I don't give a fuck where, just out of here...
So I'm talking to the clerk and I began to read the fine print on the bagage limits. It says, that I can only check 1 suitcase not exceeding 20 kilos and 1 small carry-on. I have with me, I've been traveling across Canada with 2 OVER STUFFED suitcases with my tools and a BIG carry-on bag with more tools.
So, I throw my shit on the scale and it reads 20 Kilos over. No problem I tell him, I'll gladly pay the difference, at what $1 a Kilo. Hey tells me NO...it will cost you $5 per. So my French cheap ass instinct kicked into over-drive, I throw my little hissy fit, cussing and swearing at this ** for trying to take advantage of this Poor, CHEAP French Man on a tight budget and then I storm out of the airport before security throws me out.
Back on the road once again, looks like I'll be trying to fetch a ride in the most difficult stretch of my journey...

After a bus ride through the city of Thunder Bay and 1 transfer later and a very LONG walk up-hill with my over stuffed suitcases and huge carry-on. I finally reach the outskirts of town and stick my thumb out.
Immediately a Jeep pulls over. A man named Terry ******, ex-military living off his disability checks in Thailand where he now calls home. Just come back to Canada to bury his Father's ashes, he had been driving from Vancouver...He is heading to Barrie, SWEET and he has some chronic and Thai Voldka Mudslides for the long trip...
We spend the following 16 and a half hours traveling together. He is the first cigarette smoker I have encountered, other then the cigar smokin' weirdo I had mentioned earlier in my story...
Along our travels we encounter lots of wild life. Many deers, a bull and a cow moose and a few black bears.
We run out of gas in Thessalon, just in front of this little tavern.
I step out of the Jeep and make my way towards this little tavern. As I approach I'm hearing loud music, cheers, screams and laughter, Ironic I'm only hearing female voices.
I walks in, and couldn't beleive what I was seeing...A bunch of cougars(women in their 30-40) had completely filled this tiny tavern in the middle of nowhere. This town has nothing more then a few houses, a gas station, a tavern with an OPP station right next door to it...On stage were male strippers dancing, I shit you not...The women who filled this tiny tavern up to full capacity in the middle of nowhere, all fisted cash in hand. $5 bills, $10 bills, $20 bills, just screaming for the dudes up on stage to take more off...Looked like a bunch of chicken heads in a chicken coop...Keep in mind I have not spoken to a women face to face other then my Aunt in Edmonton for the past 6 weeks.
I IMMEDIATELY high tailled out of there with the single most biggest boner I have ever had since the age of 18, and run to the Jeep out front that had just run out of gas. I tell Terry, If God wanted us to run out of gas anywhere in Canada tonight, this is where He would have wanted it to happen, right fuckin' here, right fuckin' now.
I pinch myself,
I am not dreaming...
This is where Terry drops his bomb onto me, you know the surprised left hook...
He says, "you know **, I would love nothing more then to spend the night here in Thessalon with ya, being in good company with all these poor lonely country women. But beings that I have NO car insurance on my Jeep and the OPP station right there, I think it's best we gets a move on it ASAP".
OUCH...I pinch myself again...I am not dreaming...
I've just been cocked-blocked...
I lose my boner...
I go back into the tiny fish factory of a tavern, speak with the owner/bartender. I explain to him our situation, he tells me the gas station in Thessalon closes at 10:00pm, it is now 11:30pm. He tells me to wait 1 minute, that he'll be right back. I go stand outside by the Jeep where Terry is nervously waiting...The owner/bartender returns to us and jumps out of his truck with a cherry can full of gas he just got from his home. We now have enough fuel to make it to the next town for a full fill-up.
We're back on the road...

Hitch Hiking alone BC to Ontario is something that I had always wanted to do since my teenage years.
Did I enjoy my journey? YES I did.
Would I ever do it again? If better prepared with a back-pack instead of 2 over stuffed suitcases and carry-on and in the summer, ABSOLUTELY. After all, this was a last minute decision...

I left Golden with $220 in my pocket, I arrived to Windsor with $7 left. My biggest expense was the grey hound bus ticket from Barrie to Windsor, $96 it cost me. I would have hitch hiked it, but I arrived in Barrie at 4:00am and it was pissing rain out.

Being back home with wife and kids JUST in time for Mother's Day and being able to sleep in my bed...
PRICELESS..............


PS-
Thank you ******* for supporting me and understanding why I had to do this, sorry for not calling while on the road and having you worry about my whereabouts...I'll make it up to you tonight babe, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY x0x0x0x

Merci Ma Tante ******** and ***** for ALL your help and support. I'm sorry I had my cheapass frenchman instinct attitude get the better of me in Thunder Bay and having you guys run around in circles for me for nothing...Much love and respect and HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY x0x0x0x

Merci Mon Uncle ******** and Ma Tante ****** for having me over and having a couch for me for the 5 weeks in Edonton, I miss you'se already...HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY x0x0x0x

Merci **** and ****** for driving me to Golden and for buying me an IPOD, it saved my ass from cabin fever foresure. It's pink I get it ****, but listen motherfucker it matches your panties not mine bitches..LOL Thanks bro, I'll call ya tonight turn your dam phone on...(*)v(*)

[billy_big_bud!]

dude......that was trippy. glad it all worked out.

[grow1620]

awesome. im glad it all worked out for you.

I hitchhiked across my state when I was about 20 and it was one of the the greatest things I ever did. Nothing compared to your trip, but it really showed me things from a different perspective. When I was young I was always told "never hitchhike, or an axe murderer will pick you up"....then when I was older and got my first car I was told "never pick up a hitchhiker, they're all axe murderers" hahhahah. I actually met some really nice people and no weirdos...

My friend that I went with was a pro, he had all the license plate numbers memorized and would hitch accordingly since he could tell where people were going..(in my state you can tell which county someone is from by the first few #'s of their plate). We would wait by gas stations...watching people pull off the interstate so we knew which way they were headed, and we would only ask them after they gas up and pay, and were leaving... this was so they couldn't go inside and complain that we were trying to bum rides off of people.

congratulations on your journey, glad you finally got that experience

[jarff]

glad I got a bicycle..and a Mars bar

[Kalicokitty]

Great story, I enjoyed reading it.
I wondered if anyone picked up hitch hikers these days, I hardly ever see them around here.

[ParadigmShift]

Thanks guys, it was a great experience to say the least. Theirs so much more I could add to my story but wanted to keep it as short as possible. Infact I had been picked up by this guy who had picked up another hitch hiker a few kilometers away that was also an exempty.
There was many hikers along the way that I noticed.
If your reading this, it was a red pickup in Brooks AB dropped you off at the gas station, look me up man...
Peace

[Lazyman]

Hehe great story. When I lived in Eureka CA one of my coworkers lived in Arcata, about 20 miles away. Dude didn't own a car, but was never late to work. Hitchin is still pretty common up in those parts, I pick them up as long as I have room and they don't look like they've been rolling in mud. In my truck I'll even pick up the muddy ones, lol

[MostHigh]

Quite the adventure.

Thanks for the read.