[dyren]

So this is kind of weird to be asking the folks of ICmag for relationship help but I really don't have many options at the moment. Without making too big a scene over it, I was wondering if you all had any advice about getting over someone. I'm young (almost 20), and am in the end of my first and only serious relationship. (We have a very open and honest relationship and a good connection.. been together 1yr 9mo.) She decided to break it off cause she "needs some time alone" and "doesn't want to be dating" right now. My feelings haven't changed but I cannot (and don't really want to try to) make her change her mind. We both still "care" about eachother in a major way and she would like us to just become good friends. Honestly I'd rather have that than zero contact. Things are moving in the right direction in that regard but right now it hurts so bad.

So again, any tips on MOVING ON or getting over a first love...



Thanks gals/guys

[Papulz]

give it time.. its old and cliche but really.. if nothing else you'll gain perspective and an understanding of who you are as an individual.

[mazzakush]

^word to papulz.

I'm in the same sitch. Completely had my world spun around and back when love I was looking for just wasn't there. After hell and back I'm getting to realize how awesome I am without her. Really taking time and reconstructing myself. Long overdue.

I left it saying I wanted a relationship, but ain't so sure. I did, but now I really don't care and could care less whether I see her. Just such a let down that its like, well if what I was really looking for wasn't there, who the fuck cares?

[Suby]

Getting over it is easy, find someone new.
It sounds harsh but looking for someone changes the way you think about the last person you where with and gets you in a better mind set.
I'm not talking about sex just go out and meet new people...but sex is always nice
At 20 your just getting into the relationship game and it should be about having fun and not meeting a life partner.

[dyren]

Cheers guys.

[Fatt Daddy]

i'm a younger guy too, and guys who are young like us don't need to be in a relationship. we need to focus on ourselves, careers, going to school and other stuff like that. sure its okay to have sex, but you don't need a girlfriend or really girls as friends. Girls that keep you as a "friend", are NOT INTO YOU. She wants you as Mr. Nice (not the seed dude) who she calls to complain to about Mr. Bad Boy that she IS INTO and fucking. sure not all women are like this, but a lot are. I know its hard to hear man, but her needing time alone is a cliche term that many females use as a kind way to tell a guy that theyre NOT INTO YOU. You're better of without that girl, and I mean seriously do you ever want to be anybody's pity friend? Leave this girl alone, and stop calling her. I know it's tempting but just don't call her period and ignore her calls. you'll be better off for it.

As for getting over this chick I subscribe to you a healthy dose of Leykis 101. Remember this name: TOM LEYKIS. Listen to this man and use his show as help to turn your life around.

www.971freefm.com

^^Go to that site and listen Live. His show comes on 3pm-8pm PST or 6pm-11pm EST. I suggest you start listening to his entire show everyday at least for a few months, and you'll have all your answers and enough knowledge to get over this girl. If you miss an episode, don't worry his show is podcasted on itunes. Take my advice man, you really need it. If you follow what i just recommended, you won't go wrong.

Anyways I wish you luck and just be grateful that you were spared wasting 15 years of your life with a girl that is NOT INTO YOU.

Use this fee time as time to better your life, go back to school, hit the books harder, start reading more, etc. Whatever you choose to do, the world is yours.

[LiLWaynE]

my 2 step plan/advice to you:

1) read the title of your thread 100 times


2) then read this tidbit of VERY useful information from the CIA's website

US Age Structure:
0-14 years: 20.1% (male 31,257,108/female 29,889,645)
15-64 years: 67.1% (male 101,825,901/female 102,161,823)
65 years and over: 12.7% (male 16,263,255/female 22,426,914) (2008 est.)

assuming you are a US Citizen, there are 335,922 women who could not possibly have a husband/boyfriend- unless they are polygamist.

note* lesbians are fun to watch, but unfortunately they fuck up your odds as well...

[Pharma Geddon]

You are suffering from one-itis.

Yeah, you know that there are a million fish in the sea but you only want THAT one...

Try this. Every night 4 hot babes, 2 teams of 2, wrestle for the honour of having a threesome with you. Each night 2 hot babes are going to lose and not have the pleasure of your body but life is hard...

Now imagine night 24 of this little fantasy, what was the name of your ex...?

[dyren]

Heh, thanks for the replies guys. Unfortunately she isn't a typical girl so some standard reasoning goes out the window. But I agree that the time now is for self-discovery... unfortunately I already knew that and was on course while being in this relationship. When she realized it, apparently she wasn't able to juggle relationship and self-promotion? Eh, Fatt Daddy, as far as her being NOT INTO ME, I'm not sure it's that simple - but thanks for being blunt and straightforward.

Well only time will tell, it has gotten easier over the past few days...

The real problem is I'm very bad/reluctant go meet new people (friend or more) ... you guys got any advice on that front? Most of the people I've met simply aren't worth the time.... if ya dig.

I'm currently trying to relocate.. hopefully to an area with more like-minded people. I'm sure this would help things greatly.


Again, thanks for the replies.

[metamorf]

Get stoned,
Get laid,
Get over it

Oh, if you have a hard time socializing you might wanna stop puffing the herb for a while?