CannasaurusR
Member
New here, old to the scene. I see a lot of posts about difficulty getting their seeds to germ, flaming breeder, seller,postal dude, even God. I have been acquainted with cannabis for a few years (lol) and growing for a bit now. Like everyone "I grow the best...." in reality I (and you too!) can only grow the 'best we can' with the tools and genetics at hand. I have my strengths and weaknesses, and everyone likes to get a handle on the weakness by trouble-shooting, tweaking, experimenting or starting over. I find I have to have answers, and sometimes, just sometimes, the answer we come up with is the result of flawed troubleshooting.
OK back to my shitty seeds that won't grow. My latest rotation included 11 seeds from various genetics, DNA, Woodhorse, Area 51. A couple fems and 9 regs went right into my 'super duper fantastic all-organic everything-but-water-itself proprietary custom seed starter mix' aka dirt in cups. Adjust ph'd room-temp ultra-filtered rainwater saturation level of said cups and gently place them using satin gloves on the seedling heat pad nestled in the veg. cabinet, and watch.
3 days later, I notice a little Herijuana sprout poking its' little head out, just before lights out. I go to bed like Cindy Lou Who (who was just around 2) with sugar buds dancing in my head, waiting to arise to a little bed of shining baby sprouts. A long night of restless sleep behind me (damn fossilized prostate) I rush to the cabinet, releasing its' beautiful full wavelength flourescent lighting to my awakening eyes..and...NUTHIN? WTF? was I mistaken about the sprout the night before? Was I blinded by wishful thinking? Hmm, no sign of anything.
IMMEDIATELY, declare defcon 5 and get logistics, forensics and even archeologics (that a word?) on the case PRONTO. My technicians troubleshooting mind goes to work, moisture, temperature, lights, timer....all check...run-off test of super duper fancy all frills seed mix, pH,PPM,Cl....check check....Microscope check for invasive predators...check. Getting a little peeved, now...line up family and pets for the Spanish Inquisition, maybe one of these free-loaders is messing with my shit! Paranoia is setting in as my family ,and pets, are laughing at me. My ego is crumbling as no one is validating my rage over the injustice.
Smoke one with the freeloaders and buy into their professed innocence (despite the patronizing giggling). Now it comes down to them damn breeders and their old stock right? OK ego, settle down, patience is the growers best attribute (as if I have any of that left at my age). Go over all the facts a million times again, reassess,reevaluate,restudy.....REtire? Wait, just before I start my 12 yr.old whiney letter to someone, I figure DIG for the answer (d'uh). Re-call the forensics team and start to poke perlite, peat and dog hair out of the way, piece-by-piece with 2 pins, as I lost my tweezers. Nothing in pot 1...nothing??? at pot 4 I found the spent shell casing from a seed. Furiously (but meticulously) I empty all 11 pots to find a few hulls and thats it. As I cry into the empty pots, my tears of failure dripping into the pile of dirt, that was my pride, I notice a strange shape to one of the previously $25 dollar seed husks. Grab the scope again and observe markings that everyone who doesn't live in a city recognizes.
Without making a mark in any of the 11 pots or the soil, a fucking mouse has taking a liking to eating my sprouts. I could not believe his stealth precision and cunning just trying to get a little more fiber in his diet, at the cost of my rep!!! I kinda felt bad his diet was lacking so I gave him what he needed, and force fed him the wooden base on the mousetrap and his bitch who came looking for him!
Even at 50 (or sooooo) I never stop learning, try not to jump to conclusions, and if you have a problem growing it usually is YOU. Or something you didn't notice. It is easy to react, it takes effort to react properly. Cheers, hope you had a giggle.
OK back to my shitty seeds that won't grow. My latest rotation included 11 seeds from various genetics, DNA, Woodhorse, Area 51. A couple fems and 9 regs went right into my 'super duper fantastic all-organic everything-but-water-itself proprietary custom seed starter mix' aka dirt in cups. Adjust ph'd room-temp ultra-filtered rainwater saturation level of said cups and gently place them using satin gloves on the seedling heat pad nestled in the veg. cabinet, and watch.
3 days later, I notice a little Herijuana sprout poking its' little head out, just before lights out. I go to bed like Cindy Lou Who (who was just around 2) with sugar buds dancing in my head, waiting to arise to a little bed of shining baby sprouts. A long night of restless sleep behind me (damn fossilized prostate) I rush to the cabinet, releasing its' beautiful full wavelength flourescent lighting to my awakening eyes..and...NUTHIN? WTF? was I mistaken about the sprout the night before? Was I blinded by wishful thinking? Hmm, no sign of anything.
IMMEDIATELY, declare defcon 5 and get logistics, forensics and even archeologics (that a word?) on the case PRONTO. My technicians troubleshooting mind goes to work, moisture, temperature, lights, timer....all check...run-off test of super duper fancy all frills seed mix, pH,PPM,Cl....check check....Microscope check for invasive predators...check. Getting a little peeved, now...line up family and pets for the Spanish Inquisition, maybe one of these free-loaders is messing with my shit! Paranoia is setting in as my family ,and pets, are laughing at me. My ego is crumbling as no one is validating my rage over the injustice.
Smoke one with the freeloaders and buy into their professed innocence (despite the patronizing giggling). Now it comes down to them damn breeders and their old stock right? OK ego, settle down, patience is the growers best attribute (as if I have any of that left at my age). Go over all the facts a million times again, reassess,reevaluate,restudy.....REtire? Wait, just before I start my 12 yr.old whiney letter to someone, I figure DIG for the answer (d'uh). Re-call the forensics team and start to poke perlite, peat and dog hair out of the way, piece-by-piece with 2 pins, as I lost my tweezers. Nothing in pot 1...nothing??? at pot 4 I found the spent shell casing from a seed. Furiously (but meticulously) I empty all 11 pots to find a few hulls and thats it. As I cry into the empty pots, my tears of failure dripping into the pile of dirt, that was my pride, I notice a strange shape to one of the previously $25 dollar seed husks. Grab the scope again and observe markings that everyone who doesn't live in a city recognizes.
Without making a mark in any of the 11 pots or the soil, a fucking mouse has taking a liking to eating my sprouts. I could not believe his stealth precision and cunning just trying to get a little more fiber in his diet, at the cost of my rep!!! I kinda felt bad his diet was lacking so I gave him what he needed, and force fed him the wooden base on the mousetrap and his bitch who came looking for him!
Even at 50 (or sooooo) I never stop learning, try not to jump to conclusions, and if you have a problem growing it usually is YOU. Or something you didn't notice. It is easy to react, it takes effort to react properly. Cheers, hope you had a giggle.
