Post your limerick here !!!

D

Don Cotyle

• Mar 26, 2008

• #1

There was a young Lady from Exiter
and all the young men threw their sex at her.
So just to be rude,
she lay in the nude.
While her a parrot a pervert took pecks at her!

 

D

Don Cotyle

• Mar 26, 2008

• #2

I wish I were a diamond ring
on yonder maidens hand.
because every time,
that she would wipe.
I'd see the promised land!

 

S

Space Ghost

• Mar 26, 2008

• #3

if y'all are so destitute, how come your dressed so cute?
sometimes i think it's best to toot my own horn
about my idiosyncrasies, i video pink pussies
I shoot my own porn.

 

P

Pops

Resident pissy old man

Veteran

• Mar 26, 2008

• #4

There was a young lady from Madras,
who had a magnificent ass!
Not rounded and pink,
like you probably think,
But was gray, had long ears and ate grass.

 

P

Pops

Resident pissy old man

Veteran

• Mar 26, 2008

• #5

Under the spreading chestnut tree, the village smithy sat,
amusing himself,while abusing himself and catching it in his hat!

 

P

Pops

Resident pissy old man

Veteran

• Mar 26, 2008

• #6

There once was a young lady from Natchez,
who diddled herself with matches.
One day she got excited, they all ignited
and burned all the thatch off her snatch!

 

Verite

My little pony.. my little pony

Veteran

• Mar 26, 2008

• #7

Said Sappho, on Lesbos, in Greece:
"What I much prefer to a piece:
Is to have *my* pudenda
Rubbed by the snub enda
The little pink nose of my niece!"

 

Verite

My little pony.. my little pony

Veteran

• Mar 26, 2008

• #8

A mathematician named Hall
had a hexadronical ball
the cube of its weight
times his pecker plus eight
is his number, give him a call

 

genkisan

Cannabrex Formulator

Veteran

• Mar 26, 2008

• #9

There once was a man from Dundee
Who molested an ape in a tree
The result was quite horrid
All arse and no forehead
Three balls and a purple goatee

 

genkisan

Cannabrex Formulator

Veteran

• Mar 26, 2008

• #10

There once was a wench from Azores
Whose crotch was all covered in sores
The dogs in the street
All chewed at the meat
Which hung from her poon like pink Smores

 

GeorgeSmiley

Remembers

Veteran

• Mar 26, 2008

• #11

Read these in a book in grade school and never forgot them.

There once was a man from bombay,
who fashioned a twat out of clay
but the heat from his prick,
turned it into a brick
and it chaffed all his foreskin away

There's an unbroken babe from Toronto
exceedingly hard to get into
but once you are there
and have parted the hair
you can f*ck her as much as you want to.

There once was a queen of Bulgaria
Whose bush had grown hairier and hairier,
Till a prince from Peru
Who came up for a screw
Had to hunt for her c*nt with a terrier.

 

kmk420kali

Freedom Fighter

Veteran

• Mar 26, 2008

• #12

There once was a dude with some weed...
He was persecuted for planting a seed--
They took him to Court...
He gave a chuckle and snort...
215 let him walk right out of there free--

 

EvilRaven1031

Member

• Mar 30, 2008

• #13

there once was a fella named stan
who had three feet of cock in his hand
he said to his tart, hows this for a start
...my balls are still out in the van!


ive got a MILLION of em

all of em filthy

 

burning_red

eyes that shine...

ICMag Donor

• Mar 31, 2008

• #14

there was a young man from nantucket
whose dick was so long he could suck it
he said with a grin,as he wiped off his chin
if my ear was a c*nt I could fuck it

 

J

jasondanzig

• Mar 31, 2008

• #15

no more rhymes, I mean-it!
does anyone want a peanut?

 

T

tjc1088

• Mar 31, 2008

• #16

Rape a child, get a slap on the wrist,
Grow the pot and get a judicial fist.
How dare you get high?
Perhaps you should try
pedophilia - it's less of a risk

 

J

Jgrandizzle

New member

• Mar 31, 2008

• #17

There was once a man from crewe

whose limericks stopped at line two

 

Londinium

Well-known member

ICMag Donor

Veteran

• Mar 31, 2008

• #18

The boy stood on the burning deck,
his lip's were all a quiver.
He gave a cough,
His leg fell off...
and Floated down the river.

The boy stood on the burning deck,
picking his nose like mad.
He rolled it up,
in tiny balls...
and Flicked 'em at his Dad!

Mary had a little bike,
She rode it back to front.
and everytime,
the wheel's went round...
The spokes went up her c--t!

Little Miss Muffet,
sat on her tuffet.
Smokin' a blunt &
scratchin' an itch...
Along came a Spider,
who sat down beside her..
& said "Yo gimme sum of dat Bitch!"

 

O

older toker

Member

• Mar 31, 2008

• #19

From the depths of a crypt at St. Giles
Came a scream that re-echoed for miles
Oh goodness gracious, said Brother Ignatious
I forgot that your Lordship had piles.

There was a young monarch named Ed
Who took Mrs. Simpson to bed
As they bounced up and down, he said "bugger the crown"
Let them give it to Georgie instead

 

EvilRaven1031

Member

• Mar 31, 2008

• #20

there once was a lady named dot
who inserted a fly in her twat
you'd tickle her fuzz and that fucker would buzz
'til you glued his wings tight with a shot