What's new
  • Please note members who been with us for more than 10 years have been upgraded to "Veteran" status and will receive exclusive benefits. If you wish to find out more about this or support IcMag and get same benefits, check this thread here.
  • Important notice: ICMag's T.O.U. has been updated. Please review it here. For your convenience, it is also available in the main forum menu, under 'Quick Links"!

honest opinions, please...

armedoldhippy

Well-known member
Veteran
how many of you ladies here, would watch your husband bust his ass fixing/cleaning out stopped up pipes/drains etc on his days off, then bitch because he spent $46 on parts & say "a professional would have gotten it done quicker..." oh, and i repaired the phone jack by re-splicing the wires when i finished cleaning the basement floor where the pipe ruptured. all of this from a woman that comes in from her job, picks up a book & reads until bedtime without bothering to say "hi, how did your day go?" do i sound bitter? good, because i am starting to feel that way too...how old is too old to start over?
 

Douglas.Curtis

Autistic Diplomat in Training
My parents have been together 50 years and loving it, my wife and I have been together for 16+ and we get better with each other every year.



The prescription I recommend is cannabis (which you already are aware of), honesty, more communication than you can possibly imagine, and a commitment to moving forward together toward honest and worthwhile goals.


Start with communication, I strongly recommend it. Hope it all works out well for you. :D
 
I

Ignignokt

I think if both parties are just a little bit grumpy it makes it all the worse....
Like sand paper rubbing against another piece of sandpaper, it just goes nowhere.
Try to be nice and communicate regardless of what the other person does, then if it doesn't improve at least you know you tried.
 

Mick

Member
Veteran
My single years have been my happiest by far, so I'd say it's never too late. Divorce is the perfect antidote to a bad marriage.
 

WelderDan

Well-known member
Veteran
My wife is pretty cheap. She knows that to hire a pro costs money. The first thing she asks is if I can fix it when something breaks. Just the other day, she tells me the pool pump is leaking. It's actually jetting out a tiny stream of water from a crack in the flush valve. "Can you fix it?" Yeah, it's an easy fix, but I'm betting the valve isn't cheap. So I check the local pool supply stores and the cheapest I find is $189. So off to Amazon I go with the part #. $89 bucks next day delivery with prime membership. She even took a can of Flex Seal and put a few squirts on the crack. It will hold until this weekend. Then she ordered the valve and a few other things we needed.

She has to ride my ass sometimes because I procrastinate, but she knows that hiring a pro will cost 4-5 times more than if I fix it, so she doesn't care if it take 10 minutes or 4 hours. We saved money, that's what counts.
 

oti$

Active member
My wife thinks it's sexy when I can fix stuff and likes me even more when we save money doing so. I bet your wife would change her tune after hearing the quote from a plumber making a house call. Usually it's a pretty penny to get them to show up at all, much less fix anything...
 

armedoldhippy

Well-known member
Veteran
My parents have been together 50 years and loving it, my wife and I have been together for 16+ and we get better with each other every year.



The prescription I recommend is cannabis (which you already are aware of), honesty, more communication than you can possibly imagine, and a commitment to moving forward together toward honest and worthwhile goals.


Start with communication, I strongly recommend it. Hope it all works out well for you. :D

been with her for 30 years, getting worse. she bitches when i smoke, and shows no interest in "communicating".
 

armedoldhippy

Well-known member
Veteran
My single years have been my happiest by far, so I'd say it's never too late. Divorce is the perfect antidote to a bad marriage.

i hate it, but am starting to lean that way. she is 11 years younger than i am, believe she is ready to trade in for a newer model.
 

MJPassion

Observer
ICMag Donor
Veteran
i hate it, but am starting to lean that way. she is 11 years younger than i am, believe she is ready to trade in for a newer model.


Maybe...
With all the bitching...
She already has.


If there's no communication, how can there be a worth while relationship? And if it's getting worse... Why delay the inevitable and suffer through more of the same misery?
 

Douglas.Curtis

Autistic Diplomat in Training
If there's no communication, how can there be a worth while relationship? And if it's getting worse... Why delay the inevitable and suffer through more of the same misery?
This.

Though keep in mind, anything you're not aware of in this relationship will have the same effect on your next one. This is a great opportunity to increase awareness of yourself through communicating.

Happiness is not something which drops in your lap. It definitely gets easier the more you work at it, like a boat getting up to speed. ;)
 

GGNo2

Member
Maybe...
With all the bitching...
She already has.


If there's no communication, how can there be a worth while relationship? And if it's getting worse... Why delay the inevitable and suffer through more of the same misery?

I absolutely agree with this..

To me personally I would end it from what you have said. Don't hang on to something or someone that is slowly chipping away at your soul.
To me it sounds like she has already checked out of the relationship so why keep wasting your time.
There's a 15 year difference between me and my Mrs but I'm the younger and I'm still madly in love with her and we've been together close to 16 years.
You need to flat out ask her if she is still in love with you.
Ive been in a relationship where I was being treated pretty much the same as you and I hung on and it ended all the same.
I'm glad it did because where I am now has me super content. I truely believe I found my soul mate. If I had kept hanging on to the relationship that was previous I wouldn't have ever known this love.
Belive in your gut feelings
 
Maybe remind her that a plumber would have charged you ten times what the job cost, and say, "You're welcome." as you leave the room.

If she's not into communicating, and is being a **** on top of it... ask her if she even WANTS to be in the relationship any more.

I bet she doesn't.

After you get an answer, you can either pick up the pieces and move on apart or together.

Make no mistake: it's in pieces right now. Not healthy.
 

al70

Active member
Veteran
Sorry girls, i couldn't stop myself
 

Attachments

  • LiveLeak-dot-com-14kpl7_1537469129.jpg
    LiveLeak-dot-com-14kpl7_1537469129.jpg
    71.8 KB · Views: 104
R

Robrites

Haven't heard this in decades.


Stevie Nicks says she wrote this song while contemplating going back to school or continuing on professionally with guitarist Lindsey Buckingham. Their album Buckingham Nicks had been dropped by Polydor Records and she and Buckingham were not getting along. She wrote the song while visiting Aspen, Colorado, sitting in someone's living room "looking out at the Rocky Mountains pondering the avalanche of everything that had come crashing down on us ... at that moment, my life truly felt like a landslide in many ways".


I Hope for the best possible outcome for you...
 

Gone Camping

Well-known member
30+ years with my wife.. things change, people change. Doesn't mean it's the end.. but it's up to the two of you to decide. Spill your guts.. make sure she understands where your at. Work on it.. give it the honest effort. It'll soon be apparent which direction you need to go.

Imagine this.. a man on front lawn wrestling with a toilet trying to unclog it with whatever tools and a hose he thought would be helpful. Muddy and wet this man says fuck it and buys a new toilet. Tells the women in the house what caused it.. and not to do it again.


Sewer vent starts puking out sewage.. call the plumber. $450.. told the women in the house what caused it.


Few months later the sewer vent backs up again. $450 to the plumber. Pissed off dude walks in the house, calls the women and hands them the bill. Told them to split it..


Man hasnt had an issue in years..
 

St. Phatty

Active member
Uhhhh ... Hmmmm.

Not sure there are many women here.

Maybe you're fixing stuff too fast. Let her live without so she appreciates your work more.

Once I talked a woman friend into changing a tire, so that she would learn and not be so dependent on men.
 

Mrs.Babba

THE CHIMNEY!!
ICMag Donor
Veteran
Its hard when you only hear one side....30 years is a long time to not try to see if its worth saving...saying that I would ask her why she is doesn't seem to be interested in making the marriage work? It takes both of you to want to stay together and if 1 person has checked out then you should part ways.... but if you still love each other and want to make it work then things need to change...maybe a date night? get a new toy[if you know what I mean] being together for so long its easy to just become complacent and drift apart....good luck!
 

Brother Nature

Well-known member
Some good advice in this thread. Not sure I could add much, not great at relationships myself, my dog loves me though. Maybe get a dog?
 

Latest posts

Latest posts

Top