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anyone know how to pass a "random" piss test?

O

OutLaw_Gardener

Member
I just got a new job and before I was hired I had to take a physical and drug screen. So on the way to do my physical, I stopped of at alocal "head shop" and purchased Detoxify brand XXtra clean and followed the instructions pissed several times before going in the clinic. I did my physical and drug screen and was worried sick about the test (as I desperatelly needed this job)! 2 days pass and I havn't heard from the supervisor, I called and was told that I needed to contact the clinic about my test, it came back positive for marijuana! Damn! But I was just what the supervisor was looking for, I have the skills which he was looking for and he talked to the admin lady and told her I really needed this job and I am just the man for it and to give me another shot. I got the job but now I am subject to a random drug screen!
Does anyone know of a tried and true way of passing a random test???
I have heard about the whizzanator but I would have to wear it everyday, plus I don't have the $$ for it right now, I suspect that after 30 days or so I will be subject to a random test.
HELP! Any sugestions?
I smoke at least a gram a day, it's what I do!
But I need this job, the supervisor really went out of his way to get me hired and he said that he couldn't help if I was randomly tested because more than him and the admin lady would know of the test results.
So how do I prepare for this, I suspect I will be tested on site if they do it random. But I don't know for sure and don't want to question the supervisor on this. would rather keep my pot smokingto myself without exposing it to other co-workers.
Any info would be greatly appreciated!
 
G

Guest

you are in a screwy position friend. Id say use whizinator. Those drinks dont always work. Stay clean for a while let them test you a couple times once a few negatives come up they will probably quit testing you as much. Thats how my job works. I havent been tested in years, at first it was twice a year completely random minimum.
 
mtnjohn

mtnjohn

Active member
Veteran
damn OG that totally sucks. i have had to take about 6 p-tests in my life , the thing is ..that i knew when they were gonna be, so i just drank a cup of coffee and then followed with plenty of water till i was pissin' every ten minutes or so.passed every one of them

you are in a bad way not knowing when you have to p and i'm sorry i dont know what to tell you

the real crime here is that its none of their bussiness what you do after work

this gestapho trend is getting out of hand

i wish you the best of luck getting thru this and keeping your job
 
V

valk

Member
The simple answer is to stop smoking. Unless you smoke for medical reasons, the job should always come first. You hit the nail on the head, wearing a fake bladder all the time isn't practical and isn't 100% anyways.
 
O

OutLaw_Gardener

Member
I think the best way is to just stay clean for a month or so,at least untill I can get a Whizzanator! But it's the holiday season and I also smoke weed for medical reasons, not just to get high! My boss may or may not give me a "heads up" on the test if he knows about it prior to testing. I have made myself available all over the shop learning the things I need to learn without someone telling me what to do and he sees an honest effort on my part and that means alot to him and he said he has no problem going to bat for his employees who are really pulling thier weight and doing a good job, which is exactly what I am doing! I like this job alot. I was a shop foreman at the job before this one and my experience, skills and work ethics are the reason I got this job to begin with.
I am no slacker and maybe he will give me a "heads up" on the test IF he knows about it prior to testing just to keep me employed as I have proven that I am a worthy individual and take my job seriously!
Thank you all for your support!
 
O

OutLaw_Gardener

Member
I have always hated these tests, even years ago when I was just a boozer and didn't smoke God's Herb!
It's such a HUGE invasion of privacy for people who to want to see what's inside you! It shouldn't matter if the employee is doing his best at his job and gives no reason to be tested!
What you do outside of your job should be your business and no one elses!
I agree, this urine testing is out of hand and some companies want you to give permission for them to question your nieghbors, past teachers or anyone they can question about your charator. If you don't sign the papers they won't even concider you for the job! Wal-Mart, Wal-Mart Disrtbuting, Home Depot, Lowes, AutoZone, O'Riely are just some of the companies that practice this! You actually have to sign away your rights to go to work at alot of companies these days! It's all BULLSHIT! Fucking lawyers are to blame for most of this and the rest of the blame falls to insurance companies!
This SHIT is out of hand!
 
Verite

Verite

My little pony.. my little pony
Veteran
Personally I have never seen a company give second chances with a verified failed test. I have seen them drag an employee for a few weeks until they found a replacement. More often its the insurance company pushing the testing and I never have seen them enroll someone that failed the test. I would keep looking for another job and hope you didnt need to rather than count on keeping that one.
 
7

70s_PotHead

Fake piss, its the only way unless you quit smoking. My wife works at a casino and is constantly getting random piss test. She keep a small bottle of fake piss from "urine luck" in her bra at all times and has past 4 test in the last year. They do a instant pass/fail test right there on site so it works perfect.

70s :wave:
 
G

Guest

the whizinator is the way to go. me and several friends have used a handfull of the detoxes on the market and they are generaly unreliable at best.
 
O

OutLaw_Gardener

Member
Verite said:
Personally I have never seen a company give second chances with a verified failed test. I have seen them drag an employee for a few weeks until they found a replacement. More often its the insurance company pushing the testing and I never have seen them enroll someone that failed the test. I would keep looking for another job and hope you didnt need to rather than count on keeping that one.
Click to expand...

The administration lady made the test results "go away/lossed paperwork" as it was only her, the supervisor, the lab tech and me that knew of the results.
But she and my super. had given me a fair waring the the company does do random testing and if I have to go off shore or overseas some of the companies that contract us sometimes tests you before you get on the helicopter or plane. I probably won't go off-shore for at least 6 months or longer and I can always decline the offer.
I got this job based solely on my skills and experience and the supervisor has told me he could care less about what I do outside of my job, it's none of his business, the only thing he cares about is that I do my job and I do it well! He has already told me that I will go far at this company doing exactly what I am doing and I feel that he would help me out as best he can. He got me hired even after I tested positve for pot! I seriously doubt they would drag me on a few weeks till they find a replacement!
 
O

OutLaw_Gardener

Member
70s_PotHead said:
Fake piss, its the only way unless you quit smoking. My wife works at a casino and is constantly getting random piss test. She keep a small bottle of fake piss from "urine luck" in her bra at all times and has past 4 test in the last year. They do a instant pass/fail test right there on site so it works perfect.

70s :wave:
Click to expand...


I will definately look into "urine luck" product, that's something I can keep with me at all times! I really like hearing from experienced peopleon this.
Thanks 70's PotHead!
 
G

Guest

70s_PotHead said:
Fake piss, its the only way unless you quit smoking. My wife works at a casino and is constantly getting random piss test. She keep a small bottle of fake piss from "urine luck" in her bra at all times and has past 4 test in the last year. They do a instant pass/fail test right there on site so it works perfect.

70s :wave:
Click to expand...

Your wife keeps fake urine in her bra all day. Ever hear of pockets? Is she descendant of french whore :fsu: Just kidding.
 
7

70s_PotHead

POd said:
Your wife keeps fake urine in her bra all day. Ever hear of pockets? Is she descendant of french whore :fsu: Just kidding.
Click to expand...

No pockets allowed in the casino, she is a cashier and handles over 200k each day. They do check for proper urine temp so it needs to be kept next to your skin.
I'll let the french whore coment pass for now :moon: :kissass:

70s :wave:
 
O

OutLaw_Gardener

Member
Hey '70's,
Which one of the "urine luck" products does your wife use?
I am looking at the urine luck site and just answered the questions and was recommended "Quick Fix" synthetic urine kit. Now for the sake of being in the "legal" realm of advertising, "The Quick Fix synthetic urine is premixed laboratory urine designed to protect your privacy during a urinary nicotine test."
Do they use the term "nicotine" in place of THC for the legality reasons?
And it is my understanding that this is something you can carry on a daily basis?
Thanks for your input!
OutLaw
 
Tafari

Tafari

Active member
I was on probation for a year. Had to piss for the state every week. My PO use to get pissed when I came in smelling like dank and looking high:)

Anyhow go to wal-mart and they sell little rubber maid salt shakers that hold about a oz or 2 of liquid. Have someone clean fill them and just pop them into the freezer, they'll last a year. Before your test, put the frozen piss in some warm water until liquid again. Put two hand warmers on the container then wrap it in paper toil and then throw it into a sock. The sock will help keep things warm. Next step is to put on "those whitey tighties":) you need to jock that sock.

Well the rest is obvious, when you get there just pour the clean piss into the cup and just good luck with your job.

Peace; Tafari
 
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G

Guest

Great News on the job Outlaw, Lookin forward to seeing you tomorrow, we can BS all about stupid drug test and the right to smoke fine herb.

Peace
DS
 
G

Guest

I would say just keep some synthetic urine in your pocket at all time and keep it in your armpit 20-30 mins before the test.
 
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