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How do you become confident

theclearspot

theclearspot

Active member
I want to start my own business but I don't have any confidence in my abilities to be successful at anything. I know its a stupid question but can you increase your own confidence, I suppose its a catch 22, you have to be successful to be confident... ?

I have a family2 kids and a poorly paid job I hate; the people I work with don't even answer my good mornings in the morning they know I'm just weak and unassertive. I'm 46 and never achieved anything of note. I always wanted to write a travel book aswell but i know i will be just continuing my usual job, my wife would go mad if i quit the job. People like me I think and I always try to be the joker and smile with everyone but I'm actually quite depressed( no I don't smoke that much, once or twice a week,very little ). I don't expect people to answer this stupid post i just don't have anyone to discuss it with.....
 
I

Iron_Lion

You are the captain of your own ship, the master of your own destiny. :pirate:

If all's you do is focus on negative that is what you will invite into your life. Positive attracts positive.
 
BudToaster

BudToaster

Well-known member
Veteran
being successful in a business is different from being good at the product or service the business delivers.

the couple of times i started my own business it took about 3.5 years of struggle (stress, gf issues) before i had a going business.

and there are a million details that MUST be attended to reliably and accurately. i use QuickBooks -- it is my god.

but if you're really good at something, there can be a lot of job satisfaction from being your own boss.
 
mr.brunch

mr.brunch

Well-known member
Veteran
dont quit that job, just write that book man, evenings, weekends whenever you can.

confidence lies inside you, in the knowing that you have lived 46 years and experienced lots of life, you have got yourself a wife and 2 kids, so you must be doing something right... and for the rest, just remember... bullshit baffles brains.
 
village green

village green

Member
theclearspot said:
I want to start my own business but I don't have any confidence in my abilities to be successful at anything. I know its a stupid question but can you increase your own confidence, I suppose its a catch 22, you have to be successful to be confident... ?

I have a family2 kids and a poorly paid job I hate; the people I work with don't even answer my good mornings in the morning they know I'm just weak and unassertive. I'm 46 and never achieved anything of note. I always wanted to write a travel book aswell but i know i will be just continuing my usual job, my wife would go mad if i quit the job. People like me I think and I always try to be the joker and smile with everyone but I'm actually quite depressed( no I don't smoke that much, once or twice a week,very little ). I don't expect people to answer this stupid post i just don't have anyone to discuss it with.....
Click to expand...

I can tell you what works for me when I get to feeling this way too much. Try to reclaim your integrity slowly by conducting yourself with more discipline around others. Don't change too much too fast or you'll bring too much attention to yourself and this will just increase your social anxiety. It's probably anxiety that makes you want to be the clown and defuse the tension. When you start to feel more centered around others it starts to change how you feel about yourself in other areas as well and you'll be more in touch with what your goals are. Hope this helps.
 
H

headband 707

Plant whisperer
Veteran
You need to start believing in yourself and do the best you can in this world and even if you don't succeed you did the best you could and this is all you can do and you had a good time doing it. Fuck the rest of the ppl around you they don't need to live in your world only you do so enjoy your moments with your family and show them the best you you have bra
There is a song I downloaded on,, Share a Tune called "Forgotten" By Snak The Ripper You should listen to this tune you would enjoy it...headband 707
 
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N

NotaProfessor

Active member
If you wish to start a business, the SBA has resources to help you. There is also SCORE, which, among many other things, has a free mentoring program that hooks you up with a retired business professional. That mentor will be able to guide you to becoming an independent businessman.

Both SBA and SCORE have websites filled with info. Plug those names into your browser and explore. Ask questions of these people, they are there to help.

You already know you're better than what you got for a job. Owning a business is hard work; it takes commitment and perseverance but the accomplishments are all yours.
 
thinkin

thinkin

Member
confidence is living without regret

make best decisions possible with best information you have

research, plan, execute, review, modify your plan if necessary

BE Cool, Calm, Collected and
NEVER EVER
NEVER EVER PANIC..

all this stuff has saved my ass MANY MANY TIMES.
 
B

bad gas

Member
To be successful in business, you must first be the best at whatever you do. This is the basis of confidence.

If you are not the best, imagine what you would be like if you were the best and how you would act and what you would know. Then do all those things until they are you. Over time, you will become whatever you can sufficiently imagine.

Be more dedicated than anyone else and do things to the point of rediculasness if that's a word.

good luck. bg
 
I

ItGrowsHerb

Member
Inspiring confidence while maintaining stability at home... that is tough. Obviously you want to better your life and your familys, and that is one way of taking it to the next level. Its a reasonable dream. Some days are made for taking leaps of faith so when it comes be glad for what you have and dont rest on your laurels. Good luck and Godspeed.
 
yortbogey

yortbogey

To Have More ... Desire Less
Veteran
U are but a product of U'r environment...
simply change U'r environment...
and everything else will change along with...

as for confidence....
that is the measure of U'r will power over situation/circumstance...
 
W

wrongwrong

Member
A big line of beak always makes me confident!! all joking a side isn't confidence just a state of mind? just don't become overconfident! that to me is the key. what was it mark twain said something like "to succeed in life you need confidence and ignorance". For me just disguard the fear, things in life can and will go wrong no harm in that, just don't let it get you down.. self belief is what you need...

Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.
Click to expand...


​
 
R

RudeDog

Active member
Veteran
Some good advice in this thread.

The op sounds alot like myself except the job I have, I love it and enjoy going to work.

Two weeks ago it was announced at work that there will be redundancies and although my job is safe, the news came as a shock. So I have decided to start me own business.

Amazing how threads appear on IC mag just when you need them.

Anyway, starting your own business....Make your plan, make it flexible, then do it.
 
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