immaculate
Member
Okay guys, this one's for us. (Disclaimer: This is nothing new, I'm sure, nor does it escape the realms of common sense, it's just something I find helpful in certain situations that I wanted to pass along to you.)
So you're on a date with that beautiful brunette from horticulture class. You dug out that mothball-ridden polo shirt from the bottom of the trunk in the attic, and found a decent pair of dad's old khakis in the storage closet. You get to the fancy spot you've carefully selected, an over-the-top restaurant located in the middle of a botanical garden. Everything is going well, you've made a great first impression over your mimosas, she even laughed at your shitty joke about fungus and lichen. A few mimosas later and nature calls.
You enter the restroom through a latticed doorway - cheap craftsmanship, you notice - and face up to one of those no-flush urinal troughs. Things are flowing steadily. Steadily until the end, that is.
You shake hard - too hard. A couple of stray droplets now loudly mark your penis's hideout "HERE, HERE IS THE PRICK!" they seem to shout. Oh no, what is your date going to think as she sees you coming from afar with piss all over yourself? Can you play it off like you were just washing your hands and don't use the blow-dryers because of their capacity for harboring germs and bacteria? DON'T PANIC!
Standing in the bathroom you try to think of anything, anything that will help the spots dry quicker than just letting them air dry. The food is at the table, you're thinking, this isn't good. Then you remember 6th grade physics class. FRICTION! Friction generates heat, you recall. Heat evaporates liquid at a faster rate! Instantly you begin rubbing your finger vigorously across your khakis and as your finger begins to burn you stare in amazement as the spots disappear. Awesome, you think to yourself.
So, if you find that a few stray drops have landed in a very awkward spot, just rub your denim/corduroy/khakis/whatever with your finger(s) until they evaporate. This usually takes about 45 seconds and has saved me some awkward situations.
I'm sure most people already do this, but I've never talked to anybody about it so from one stoner to the next here it is.
So you're on a date with that beautiful brunette from horticulture class. You dug out that mothball-ridden polo shirt from the bottom of the trunk in the attic, and found a decent pair of dad's old khakis in the storage closet. You get to the fancy spot you've carefully selected, an over-the-top restaurant located in the middle of a botanical garden. Everything is going well, you've made a great first impression over your mimosas, she even laughed at your shitty joke about fungus and lichen. A few mimosas later and nature calls.
You enter the restroom through a latticed doorway - cheap craftsmanship, you notice - and face up to one of those no-flush urinal troughs. Things are flowing steadily. Steadily until the end, that is.
You shake hard - too hard. A couple of stray droplets now loudly mark your penis's hideout "HERE, HERE IS THE PRICK!" they seem to shout. Oh no, what is your date going to think as she sees you coming from afar with piss all over yourself? Can you play it off like you were just washing your hands and don't use the blow-dryers because of their capacity for harboring germs and bacteria? DON'T PANIC!
Standing in the bathroom you try to think of anything, anything that will help the spots dry quicker than just letting them air dry. The food is at the table, you're thinking, this isn't good. Then you remember 6th grade physics class. FRICTION! Friction generates heat, you recall. Heat evaporates liquid at a faster rate! Instantly you begin rubbing your finger vigorously across your khakis and as your finger begins to burn you stare in amazement as the spots disappear. Awesome, you think to yourself.
So, if you find that a few stray drops have landed in a very awkward spot, just rub your denim/corduroy/khakis/whatever with your finger(s) until they evaporate. This usually takes about 45 seconds and has saved me some awkward situations.
I'm sure most people already do this, but I've never talked to anybody about it so from one stoner to the next here it is.
