WTF?should 13yr old be smokin pot w/ prnts

[SmilinBob]

This is my last post to this thread. First of all. This thread is to post your opinions on what you think is right and wrong in this situation.

Obviously you can't change my opinion on this subject, don't try.

If you think you aren't the final word for a 13 year old CHILD then obviously you are doing something wrong.

16-17 years old.. Yea, I agree. They will probably do what they want when they want regardless of what their parents say. I did.

The question here is a thirteen year old child. That's 8th grade. If it comes down to it. You have the right, ability, and obligation to do everything in your power to make that kid take the right road in life until you no longer can. Which comes about 3 to 4 years after 13. If that kid is using drugs at 13 she will never have the mental capacity of someone that never used drugs until after their brain was developed. Yes, before anyone says anything about that statement. I do believe it, and I do believe I'd be in a better place in life if I did listen to my parents in those teen years. If I would have waited to experience the world before I started using drugs I 100% believe that I would be better off.

Drugs?

Yes, A drug. Regardless of what you believe. Marijuana is a drug.

 

[HempKat]

So I have to ask you all! One of my family members friends has a 13 year old daughter, both parents are heavy pot smokers. My sister walked into their house the other day and their sat the 13 year old daughter smoking a bong with both parents, and of course the parents think, because the daughter said she wants to smoke pot "she is better off smoking with them than god knows where and with who!"

Is it just me or is this completely FUCKED UP!?

First of all, if the cops or the school found out, all hell would break loose, on many different levels, for the parents and who ever they get their smoke from.

Second of all, while she is still a child she should be forebiden to smoke anything at home or anywhere else. when she is out of school and 18yrs old then maybe it would be another matter.

These parents have always smoked infront of their children.
Myself I will never smoke infront of my children any time soon, not until they are adults, just my opinion

Please let me know what you think!
Thanks

There's not enough info to properly judge if this is fucked up or not. One would need to know first of how the 13 year old in question started smoking. If the parents openly smoked and were stoned around the kid and encoraged her to smoke and were the one's to give her, her first taste of weed then yeah that's fucked up. Not because of her age or that her brain is still developing or what would happen if the authorities find out but because in that scenario the child never really had the chance to decide not to smoke. Now if the 13 year old started on her own, the parents found out and then encourage her to do it around them because it was safer then the streets then no that's not fucked up.

Now as for all this brain developement bullshit. I started smoking at age 11. I have an IQ that is 164 which while not a super genius level like the Mensa Society (180 or above) it is considered genius level. In high school I never did homework, never read the textbooks and yet I still maintained B's and C's just listening to the lectures and acing the exams. In College I was a little more disciplined and maintained a 4.0 GPA. In tech school I had a 4.0 GPA and graduated at the top of my class. Marijuana in no way shape or form prevented my brain from developing. Of course marijuana was not the only drug I was exposed to while young but most were when I was around 17.

I did smoke at home but not because my folks allowed it. They never knew as I just smoked in the afternoon before they were home from work. As has been said here by several people, kids at that age are starting to assert themselves as thinking individuals capable of making their own decisions. They'll do what they want to do regardless of how strict you try to be. You might think you got them under control by laying down the law but all you've really done is taught the kid to never let you know about it. In extreme cases you might even cause the kid to leave home well before they are ready for that.

For the people that say "at home with the parents because it's safer" is cop out I disagree based on first hand experience. If I were able to grow it and do it freely at home I wouldn't have been buying on the streets. I wouldn't have been exposed to and used things like LSD, PCP and other hard drugs when I couldn't find weed, that were potentially much more harmful for brain developement then marijuana. I also would likely have never ended up in the situation that got me busted and sent to prison for 5 years and made it impossible to get a job with any kind of real future.

I wish I knew more of what the parents represented in this question were thinking and had done, that got them to the point of openly doing bong hits with their child at age 13. Then I could properly answer the question. If it all began much younger with the parents blowing smoke in the kid's face and then thinking it funny when the kid becomes stoned, much the way some stoners are with their pets then yeah that's fucked up and the parents should be demonized. If on the other hand they discovered their kid was using and encouraged her to use around them so they could have some influence on her use then I say that's fine and not neglect or abuse.

 

[headband 707]

This is my last post to this thread. First of all. This thread is to post your opinions on what you think is right and wrong in this situation.

Obviously you can't change my opinion on this subject, don't try.

If you think you aren't the final word for a 13 year old CHILD then obviously you are doing something wrong.

16-17 years old.. Yea, I agree. They will probably do what they want when they want regardless of what their parents say. I did.

The question here is a thirteen year old child. That's 8th grade. If it comes down to it. You have the right, ability, and obligation to do everything in your power to make that kid take the right road in life until you no longer can. Which comes about 3 to 4 years after 13. If that kid is using drugs at 13 she will never have the mental capacity of someone that never used drugs until after their brain was developed. Yes, before anyone says anything about that statement. I do believe it, and I do believe I'd be in a better place in life if I did listen to my parents in those teen years. If I would have waited to experience the world before I started using drugs I 100% believe that I would be better off.


Yes, A drug. Regardless of what you believe. Marijuana is a drug.

Okay bro lets just say it like this then.. I was 13 when I started to smoke and I smoked my brains out lol.. I went to college and got A's and B's so so much for your brain theory lol.Ppl have a tendency to believe what they want not necessarily what is true... peace out Headband707

 

[FlaDankster]

This is my last post to this thread. First of all. This thread is to post your opinions on what you think is right and wrong in this situation.

Obviously you can't change my opinion on this subject, don't try.

If you think you aren't the final word for a 13 year old CHILD then obviously you are doing something wrong.

16-17 years old.. Yea, I agree. They will probably do what they want when they want regardless of what their parents say. I did.

The question here is a thirteen year old child. That's 8th grade. If it comes down to it. You have the right, ability, and obligation to do everything in your power to make that kid take the right road in life until you no longer can. Which comes about 3 to 4 years after 13. If that kid is using drugs at 13 she will never have the mental capacity of someone that never used drugs until after their brain was developed. Yes, before anyone says anything about that statement. I do believe it, and I do believe I'd be in a better place in life if I did listen to my parents in those teen years. If I would have waited to experience the world before I started using drugs I 100% believe that I would be better off.


Yes, A drug. Regardless of what you believe. Marijuana is a drug.

I know ya said this was your last post but could you PLEASE tell me how i "MAKE MY KID TAKE THE RIGHT ROAD IN LIFE" as you put it.

Or any damn body for that matter....i'd love to know this "OUR KIDS ARE LIKE COMPUTERS,WE BUILD THEM TO OUR LIKING" way of parenting.

Yes i do feel 13 is a bit early.

But i do also believe that a stable home and good parent/child relationship is much more important than age when it comes to smokin around or with your children.

 

[InvisibleEmpire]

I say when your kid is old enough to make his own decisions then you could 'start' smoking with them...I'd say 16 at the earliest but closer to 17 or 18 before I even brought it around them...

I was 15 when i started messing with it...daily toker by 17...

it's difficult because look at it like drinking, do you feed your 13 year old alcohol? so why would you do that with weed....

 

[FlaDankster]

Weed Alcohol

Apples Oranges

Black White

My kids have been making there own decisions since they were around TWO.

I would say when a child is able to make their own "MATURE,RESPONSIBLE AND ADULT MINDED DECISIONS" then join the party.But those kind of decisions i would say depends on the parenting itself to begin with.

 

[jd4083]

This is my last post to this thread. First of all. This thread is to post your opinions on what you think is right and wrong in this situation.

Obviously you can't change my opinion on this subject, don't try.

If you think you aren't the final word for a 13 year old CHILD then obviously you are doing something wrong.

16-17 years old.. Yea, I agree. They will probably do what they want when they want regardless of what their parents say. I did.

The question here is a thirteen year old child. That's 8th grade. If it comes down to it. You have the right, ability, and obligation to do everything in your power to make that kid take the right road in life until you no longer can. Which comes about 3 to 4 years after 13. If that kid is using drugs at 13 she will never have the mental capacity of someone that never used drugs until after their brain was developed. Yes, before anyone says anything about that statement. I do believe it, and I do believe I'd be in a better place in life if I did listen to my parents in those teen years. If I would have waited to experience the world before I started using drugs I 100% believe that I would be better off.


Yes, A drug. Regardless of what you believe. Marijuana is a drug.

Indeed...

General response to thread (not directed at anyone in particular) - The "head in the sand" argument would be valid, except that if your kid is smoking pot at 13, you already fucked up as a parent. You guys can throw out all of the justifications and platitudes you want, but if this thread is hitting a little too close to home, perhaps you should consider worrying more about being a parent and less about being a pothead. Nobody's perfect, least of all me, but honestly some of the responses in this thread astound me...somehow I am always surprised by the number of people on this forum who are completely out of touch with reality.

 

[jd4083]

Weed Alcohol

Apples Oranges

Black White

My kids have been making there own decisions since they were around TWO.

I would say when a child is able to make their own "MATURE,RESPONSIBLE AND ADULT MINDED DECISIONS" then join the party.But those kind of decisions i would say depends on the parenting itself to begin with.

It is impossible for a child to make such decisions without the appropriate life experience to draw from...and the only decision that your kid made at age two was which flavor juice box he wanted...get real people, either be a parent or be a burnout, there ain't room for both. This world is fucked up enough as it is, we don't need any more unqualified parents messing it up for the rest of us.

 

[el dub]

Any 13 year old deciding to smoke weed just made a bad decision, imo. And while I'd expect that from a kid, parents should know better.

We need a license to drive, fish and hunt but we'll let anyone reproduce.....

lw

 

[jd4083]

There's not enough info to properly judge if this is fucked up or not. One would need to know first of how the 13 year old in question started smoking. If the parents openly smoked and were stoned around the kid and encoraged her to smoke and were the one's to give her, her first taste of weed then yeah that's fucked up. Not because of her age or that her brain is still developing or what would happen if the authorities find out but because in that scenario the child never really had the chance to decide not to smoke. Now if the 13 year old started on her own, the parents found out and then encourage her to do it around them because it was safer then the streets then no that's not fucked up.

Now as for all this brain developement bullshit. I started smoking at age 11. I have an IQ that is 164 which while not a super genius level like the Mensa Society (180 or above) it is considered genius level. In high school I never did homework, never read the textbooks and yet I still maintained B's and C's just listening to the lectures and acing the exams. In College I was a little more disciplined and maintained a 4.0 GPA. In tech school I had a 4.0 GPA and graduated at the top of my class. Marijuana in no way shape or form prevented my brain from developing. Of course marijuana was not the only drug I was exposed to while young but most were when I was around 17.

I did smoke at home but not because my folks allowed it. They never knew as I just smoked in the afternoon before they were home from work. As has been said here by several people, kids at that age are starting to assert themselves as thinking individuals capable of making their own decisions. They'll do what they want to do regardless of how strict you try to be. You might think you got them under control by laying down the law but all you've really done is taught the kid to never let you know about it. In extreme cases you might even cause the kid to leave home well before they are ready for that.

For the people that say "at home with the parents because it's safer" is cop out I disagree based on first hand experience. If I were able to grow it and do it freely at home I wouldn't have been buying on the streets. I wouldn't have been exposed to and used things like LSD, PCP and other hard drugs when I couldn't find weed, that were potentially much more harmful for brain developement then marijuana. I also would likely have never ended up in the situation that got me busted and sent to prison for 5 years and made it impossible to get a job with any kind of real future.

I wish I knew more of what the parents represented in this question were thinking and had done, that got them to the point of openly doing bong hits with their child at age 13. Then I could properly answer the question. If it all began much younger with the parents blowing smoke in the kid's face and then thinking it funny when the kid becomes stoned, much the way some stoners are with their pets then yeah that's fucked up and the parents should be demonized. If on the other hand they discovered their kid was using and encouraged her to use around them so they could have some influence on her use then I say that's fine and not neglect or abuse.

With an IQ of 164, I would think there wouldn't be quite so many logical fallacies all contained in one post

 

[DocLeaf]

Please let me know what you think!
Thanks

13 is young age to be smoking anything... personally a more acceptable age would be 16 onwards.

However,, if i had a daughter (that was intent on smoking pot).. i'd sooner she was stoned at home,, than out on the streets who-knows-where with dealers and irresponsible minors.

Tuff call.

 

[HempKat]

With an IQ of 164, I would think there wouldn't be quite so many logical fallacies all contained in one post

What logical fallacies?, I gave real life experiences. Just because you don't agree with the conclusions they lead to doesn't make them logical fallacies. It just means that you have a different opinion. To judge them as logical fallacies means you're overly opinionated and probably think your shit doesn't stink.

By the way your ignorance of IQ is shining thru. Just because one has a high IQ doesn't mean they don't make spelling mistakes, grammer mistakes, math mistakes, etc. In fact, often times they are more prone to make them because people with high IQ's are typically bored by most educational systems and therefore don't learn these skills as well as others with more average IQ's.

All a high IQ really means is that the person with a high IQ tends to learn and incorporate things faster then someone with a lower IQ. Hence my ability to maintain passing grades in school just listening to lectures and acing exams.

 

[FlaDankster]

It is impossible for a child to make such decisions without the appropriate life experience to draw from...and the only decision that your kid made at age two was which flavor juice box he wanted...get real people, either be a parent or be a burnout, there ain't room for both. This world is fucked up enough as it is, we don't need any more unqualified parents messing it up for the rest of us.

I'm glad your able to figure out what kind of decisions my 2 yr old made.

The remark was in response to IE post.

And i consider a 17 or even 18 a damn child.By this time in life they would more than likely have have " appropriate life experience".....to draw from.

 

[SmilinBob]

I know ya said this was your last post but could you PLEASE tell me how i "MAKE MY KID TAKE THE RIGHT ROAD IN LIFE" as you put it.

Or any damn body for that matter....i'd love to know this "OUR KIDS ARE LIKE COMPUTERS,WE BUILD THEM TO OUR LIKING" way of parenting.

Yes i do feel 13 is a bit early.

But i do also believe that a stable home and good parent/child relationship is much more important than age when it comes to smokin around or with your children.

Sure, just for you. Anything you can do to make sure the kid doesn't make a mistake early on. That is your responsibility.

I can't tell you how to do it. Because it's different for each person.
Like I said it's my opinion on the subject. If you don't like it please ignore me.

In this situation I'd rather have a safe 13 year old that hates me. Because later I know she will thank me. If you don't agree that's your opinion, and I don't want to hear it or discuss it.

Thanks

 

[guest2012y]

I did.....Thanks pop! B-hits for allowance..hell yeah! Later in our teen years we would be the ones finding weed for our parents...and to this day I supply my father with free organic nugs.
We grew up in the 70's...things were very different.

 

[teemu shalanie]

I cant believe this?, never has one 13 year old kid got so much damn attention , maybe if some of us got this kind of attention when we were young we wouldn't of turned to the dreaded devil weed!

Ok lets get real @13 kids are curious, they r experimenting with drugs and also sex, like it or not. whether or not you as a parent play the role of cool parent, or cop parent is up 2 you ?, I know parents who bought alcohol for 13-14 years old to drink, and have a lil teen party on thier property, because the kids are going to get drunk,high etc.- one way or another, its just piece of mind that they r having fun @ a safe location , with some supervision @ all,.

let the children grow

peace TS

 

[Miss Blunted]

I wouldn't encourage it, but if I found out that my kid was smoking pot, I'd ask them that they do it at home and stay their ass at home. As far as smoking with my 13 year old....I couldn't see myself doing that. I couldn't imagine smoking with my Son at 17, honestly. But, I know that my Son will try weed....he may be a stoner like Mommy and Daddy, he may not be. All that I want out of that situation is that my Son know where and when it's appropriate to be stoned, how to be careful and that his life isn't suffering from smoking weed.

My parents had an open door policy...I was allowed to drink alcohol and smoke weed (outside) at home because my parents knew I was doing it anyways. Neither of my parents smoke weed or drink alcohol, by the way. But, my Mom knew that if she had tried to stop me from smoking weed, drinking or having sex....she would have lost any chance to teach me how to do these things appropriately because I would have been hiding it from her. Those kinds of parents are the ones who have no idea WHO their kids are or WHAT they are doing. I think kids with parents who try to shelter them too much go off the deep end a little more too. Those were the kids I was seeing flunk out of college because they were just getting their first taste of adult life.

So yeah, I don't encourage smoking with your kids, but being real about what they are doing is a situation that each parent really needs to consider very logically.

 

[headband 707]

Weed Alcohol

Apples Oranges

Black White

My kids have been making there own decisions since they were around TWO.

I would say when a child is able to make their own "MATURE,RESPONSIBLE AND ADULT MINDED DECISIONS" then join the party.But those kind of decisions i would say depends on the parenting itself to begin with.

You see this is where I totally disagree as my parents didn't do drugs or smoke cannabis .. Again that was all me lol....I'm sure my parents said everything to make sure I didn't do any drugs but hey again this is my life lol... You can't make a kid do what you want because, you want it... I loved my parents but I still did what I wanted and always will. lol.. Has nothing to do with disrespect or not caring about what they thought and everything to do with ME growing up the way I wanted..The more you stifel a kid the less they learn.Perhaps in your eyes your doing the right thing by stopping them from living the way they think is right or perhaps you don't think your 13 year old is smart enough or as wise as you would like to start going down this road. That is obviously up to the indiviual 13 year old some are much smarted then we give them credit for. lol..peace out Headband707

Big fat PS.. If you yourself didn't question authority then you wouldn't have smoked bud yourself.. You know what they say"Whats good for the Goose" lol

 

[In~Plain~Site]

You see this is where I totally disagree as my parents didn't do drugs or smoke cannabis .. Again that was all me lol....I'm sure my parents said everything to make sure I didn't do any drugs but hey again this is my life lol... You can't make a kid do what you want because, you want it... I loved my parents but I still did what I wanted and always will. lol.. Has nothing to do with disrespect or not caring about what they thought and everything to do with ME growing up the way I wanted..The more you stifel a kid the less they learn..peace out Headband707

How in the world are you making the connection that good, responsible parenting is somehow stifling a child's growth?

Your logic is severely flawed.

Have any kids?

Once again, this topic needs to be viewed through the eyes of an actual parent, and not the "Fuck the man" mentality that permeates youth(I'm trying to be kind here)

Although, I do quite often say "Fuck the man" myself, I think the difference being I actually understand why I'm saying it and with good cause.

You know, something other than "My dad's a dick for making me take the trash out"

 

[Eugenics]

I applaud the parents for providing safe access, and quality control of medicine. Cannabis is much safer than Prozac, Zoloft, Wellbutrin, Ritalin or Depakote. If the child is benefiting from its use, then there is no harm. If you are aware of Dr. Lester Grinspoon, was he abusing his child? Watch the man tear up telling his story, he risked his career, reputation, and criminal charges to provide a better quality of life for his son. They are reducing the chance of him being arrested for simple possession; which could ruin their child's future. I doubt they are doing it to get a laugh, they know how natural and non toxic it is, I'm sure they would not permit further use, if negative actions were observed. I personally have seen a 15 year old with Asperger's autism benefit from it's use. No, not every kid should be introduced to this wonderful plant. Those who can benefit, I see no problem with the use. Parents do need to set limitations, they need to explain the difference of use and abuse. Kudos if they are helping, they are providing care.