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Bad News.... Good News...

GET MO

Registered Med User
Veteran
The bad news is I got cancer from smoking to much weed. The good news is I got a script!!!





jus playin. its a game. next!
 

Moldy Dreads

Active member
Veteran
right-wrong-ways-to-pee.jpg



One is good news and one is bad news for sure..
 

ArcticBlast

It's like a goddamned Buick Regal
Veteran
Gallery Owner:I have some good news and some bad news.

Artist:What's the good news?

Gallery Owner:The good news is that a man came in here today asking if the price of your paintings would go up after you die. When I told him they would he bought every one of your paintings.

Artist: That's great! What's the bad news?

Gallery Owner:The bad news is that man was your doctor!



yeah i just googled "good news bad news" lol

ArcticBlast
 

ArcticBlast

It's like a goddamned Buick Regal
Veteran
Wife:I have some good news and some bad news.

Husband:What's the good news?

Wife:The good news is I found a picture that's worth $500,000.

Husband:Wow! That's wonderful! What's the bad news?

Wife:The bad news is that the picture is of you and your secretary!


ArcticBlast
 

whiterabbit9

Active member
Veteran
A guy is in the hospital with two broken legs. The nurse comes in and tells him that there's good news and bad news.

The guy asks for the bad news first.

The nurse says, "We're going to have to remove your legs."

Then the guy asks for the good news.

The nurse says, "The guy beside you wants to buy your sneakers."


Bad: You find a porn movie in your son's room.
Worse: You're in it.

Bad: Your husband's a cross-dresser.
Worse: He looks better than you.
 

SpasticGramps

Don't Drone Me, Bro!
ICMag Donor
Veteran
Yummy about to get laid would be good news. Bad news? Her batteries were dead and now you have to read about it.
 

armedoldhippy

Well-known member
Veteran
good news, bad news

good news, bad news

doc: "well, i see your penis has grown three inches longer. too bad it is cancerous, gonna have to cut it off..." that one makes me squirm when i think about it...:yoinks:
 

whiterabbit9

Active member
Veteran
^^

I had a nightmare where my dick turned purple, let me tell you when I awoke I was in a state of shock... happy that it didn't happen but...

was that a premonitory dream ? yikes


I also dreamt my lower teeth disolved into foam (liquid)... I was in shock too
especially that I have a little problem with my lower teeth... yiiiiikes
 

spyvsspy

Member
^^

I had a nightmare where my dick turned purple, let me tell you when I awoke I was in a state of shock... happy that it didn't happen but...

was that a premonitory dream ? yikes

Haha, this reminds me of a true story told to me by my paramedic friend. So a guy just married his wife, and he wanted to give her great sex on their honeymoon- so he injected meth directly into his dick for 5 days straight so he could sport continuous wood and ravage her. And then, on the 6th day, his penis turned black and LITERALLY fell off. (he said it was laying on the ground next to the guy when he got there)

:chin: Hmmmmm, this could be a quality good news/bad news joke:

Good news: you ravage your wife for 5 straight days on your honeymoon
Bad news: your dick falls off on the 6th day
 

JimBeamKush

Member
Good news: This thread was a epic failure, and died a normal death.
Bad news: Spyvsspy bumped it back alive.


Just kidding i thought some of this stuff was funny
 
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