A
arcticsun
dont mean to be a party pooper here, but the only true love in my heart that will last forever is for mary.
true story, call the press
true story, call the press
My one true love is nature, has been since before I can remember. My mother says I demanded to go to the woods or fishing when I was 3, ran at 10 months old and have been walking the woods ever since.
Funny thing is I have no family or friends who fish or ever have, nature and fishing are just callings I can't ignore.
Funny thing is I have no family or friends who fish or ever have, nature and fishing are just callings I can't ignore.
C
cbf
Yeah it seems to only get worse, last night was a shocker. This whole economic thing is partially to blame. House devaluated over 100 grand over the past year, we bought right before it crashed. We have growing kids that have a big age gap and need their own rooms, credit card debt etc has made a huge impact on our daily life. I mean we don't usually have money to spare for anything, and bankruptcy is also an alternative as well as foreclosure. So I call relatives and ask if they have any info. on how to proceed and what are the laws of foreclosures, bankruptcy etc, and if they could call me back with advice. So they call her later on to find out what is going on and to calm her a bit, and they end the conversation with her saying that my smoking herb is the sole cause of losing the house and every other issue in our life.
I could not believe she would tell my Republican, prejudiced, far away living parents, who have no idea what our lifestyles are, that all our problems were due to me using Cannabis. When we were looking at this house 2 years ago, she even said I would have a space to grow my herb so I wouldn't have to buy shady black market herb and deal with dealers when I had none , she knew I grew herb for many years at other locations, or on the porch, backyard etc. so she pretty much misled me into thinking it was ok. Now it's not ok, she went back on her word. She admitted to being prejudice, said it was a drug and I was addicted and couldn't stop. Like I'm some kind of loser. Meanwhile I'm making the same amount of cash at a full time regular job, and handle all the household and child issues until night time when she gets in from the gym, work, whatever..
Anyway, she threw me under the bus and said my smoking herb was a huge issue and now they are worried shitless and scared for the kids. I've never seen such drama.
I have 6 plants in a closet, med patient, in Cali. Doctor supervised, run 30 miles a week, handle life...she can't even tell me the negative or harmful aspect of my smoking herb, just that she went from smoking it to hating it..and everything else involved with it. She hates the time I dedicate to my plants, etc. Insane, but when the extra 1000 comes in to pay the extra bills she sure is content.
I told her she was a hypocrite and prejudiced and she said "yes I am" because she too smokes once in a while and thinks people who use med mj are chemically dependent drug users, dealers etc, across the plane, when before she used to like the said plant..
I would never believe someone I've been with for 15 years would throw these words around, and completely ruin my relationship with my parents over unhappiness that I smoke herb? Telling them details about our life as a couple..
Yeah, we're going to talk again today, but at this point, I'm the one getting dissilusioned. We've had this talk 4 times over the past 7 or 8 years and it all boils down to Cannabis, spending time with plants, trimming, being happy with my hobby..She thinks I only have friends due to Cannabis, the reasons are so mundane...
She categorizes my friends by age and tells me what age group I should be hanging out with (18-25 or 40-75 year olds are unnaceptable), but really no negative side effects aside from smoking in the house, which I have cut down on..anyway, thanks for your post, it all makes alot of sense and you are right on the theories and all, but man it's complicated..
I feel the exact same way, grew up in the woods and fishing...thanks..
Wow, I love that eye candy, how could I force myself to stop liking that?
Chamba, I believe Andre Maurois is correct and sadly we never did this, we let the rat race dominate our lives before we could understand how to find true happiness in life, I think we let the race for money and survival in a capitalist economy ruin our bond, it got weaker and weaker..jaded? I hope there is a return, I really do love her, I just don't know if the change she's experienced will overcome my meds and my lack of change, she is very caught up in the material world, I'm trying to understand lifeand just be happy....;(
My party already got pooped on by others, your words reflect my sentiment, and it's how I feel like viewing life from now on, lock on the heart and swallow the key..no more of this BS for me..
I could not believe she would tell my Republican, prejudiced, far away living parents, who have no idea what our lifestyles are, that all our problems were due to me using Cannabis. When we were looking at this house 2 years ago, she even said I would have a space to grow my herb so I wouldn't have to buy shady black market herb and deal with dealers when I had none , she knew I grew herb for many years at other locations, or on the porch, backyard etc. so she pretty much misled me into thinking it was ok. Now it's not ok, she went back on her word. She admitted to being prejudice, said it was a drug and I was addicted and couldn't stop. Like I'm some kind of loser. Meanwhile I'm making the same amount of cash at a full time regular job, and handle all the household and child issues until night time when she gets in from the gym, work, whatever..
Anyway, she threw me under the bus and said my smoking herb was a huge issue and now they are worried shitless and scared for the kids. I've never seen such drama.
I have 6 plants in a closet, med patient, in Cali. Doctor supervised, run 30 miles a week, handle life...she can't even tell me the negative or harmful aspect of my smoking herb, just that she went from smoking it to hating it..and everything else involved with it. She hates the time I dedicate to my plants, etc. Insane, but when the extra 1000 comes in to pay the extra bills she sure is content.
I told her she was a hypocrite and prejudiced and she said "yes I am" because she too smokes once in a while and thinks people who use med mj are chemically dependent drug users, dealers etc, across the plane, when before she used to like the said plant..
I would never believe someone I've been with for 15 years would throw these words around, and completely ruin my relationship with my parents over unhappiness that I smoke herb? Telling them details about our life as a couple..
Yeah, we're going to talk again today, but at this point, I'm the one getting dissilusioned. We've had this talk 4 times over the past 7 or 8 years and it all boils down to Cannabis, spending time with plants, trimming, being happy with my hobby..She thinks I only have friends due to Cannabis, the reasons are so mundane...
She categorizes my friends by age and tells me what age group I should be hanging out with (18-25 or 40-75 year olds are unnaceptable), but really no negative side effects aside from smoking in the house, which I have cut down on..anyway, thanks for your post, it all makes alot of sense and you are right on the theories and all, but man it's complicated..
I feel the exact same way, grew up in the woods and fishing...thanks..
Wow, I love that eye candy, how could I force myself to stop liking that?
Chamba, I believe Andre Maurois is correct and sadly we never did this, we let the rat race dominate our lives before we could understand how to find true happiness in life, I think we let the race for money and survival in a capitalist economy ruin our bond, it got weaker and weaker..jaded? I hope there is a return, I really do love her, I just don't know if the change she's experienced will overcome my meds and my lack of change, she is very caught up in the material world, I'm trying to understand lifeand just be happy....;(
My party already got pooped on by others, your words reflect my sentiment, and it's how I feel like viewing life from now on, lock on the heart and swallow the key..no more of this BS for me..
CBF .........
I have a situation with my relationship as well, although it isnt anything like yours. But I am sympothetic.
Im not saying this is the case, for I dont even know you. However, I know that it is really, really hard to look at our own faults, although its very easy to point out others. Thats reflected in both your words that you have mentioned, and also her words back to you.
Thats the huge problem with people in general. Again, dont get me wrong Im not saying it is you or it is your wife, but when she says that the problems you guys are having come from the time you spend on cannabis .... have you taken time to drop your defenses (easier said then done), take a step back ... and REALLY analyze the situation to see if shes right?
Maybe shes not right. Maybe she is. Complicated is right, all relationships are complicated, without a doubt. It could be she feels neglected from the time you spend with your plants. Maybe its not necessarily the time youve spent with the plants, but time that you are not spending with her .. that may have nothing to do with the plants.
Of course .... then again ... many women I know, and have known ... have dreamed about their marriage ... and the resulting family that they will one day have since the time they were little girls. They've had fanatasies about they life they want to have one day. Maybe now that you guys are married, and have childeren ... she is struggiling because the life you both have isnt the life she imagined for herself when she was little.
Cannabis was fun for her once upon a time, she was happy when she got married because maybe... to her it meant the next "phase" of her life ... as it does to so many women. Now shes mad because that phase isnt coming, and your bewildered wondering what the hell is going on .... because she was happy once, and things havent changed so why is she now all of the sudden not happy?
Then again ... its probably neither of those things. Who the hell knows? No one ever will until you ask her. When people have been fighting over a period of time, they both become very defensive, and its hard to get them to drop that defensiveness. Im betting it has something to do with an idea she had in her head about how her life would be when she got married ... but in order for her to open up and tell you the TRUTH. She needs to feel close to you again to reveal something so intamate.
Maybe it wouldnt be a bad idea to stop smoking for awhile, so that you can show her a token of good faith ... and let her know she is important to you and you need to know what about it is really bothering you. Why was it ok early on in our marriage? What is different now that makes it not ok?
I dont know man ... this is just my 2 cents, but do I feel for you. Im in a relationship where I am the one that is unsatisified, but the girl Im with is the single best person I have ever met in my life. So Im going through some soul searching as well, only Im trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with me that I cant be satisfied with this gem of a good hearted person I am privilaged to call my girlfriend... we dont click very well at all, we really dont. Its super unfortunate because as I mentioned she is such a good person its incredible. At the age of 30 you would think I would be able to avoid getting wrapped up into relationships that arent right ... but I guess I havent gotten there yet.
Good luck to you, I hope you can find the common ground you both need.
I have a situation with my relationship as well, although it isnt anything like yours. But I am sympothetic.
Im not saying this is the case, for I dont even know you. However, I know that it is really, really hard to look at our own faults, although its very easy to point out others. Thats reflected in both your words that you have mentioned, and also her words back to you.
Thats the huge problem with people in general. Again, dont get me wrong Im not saying it is you or it is your wife, but when she says that the problems you guys are having come from the time you spend on cannabis .... have you taken time to drop your defenses (easier said then done), take a step back ... and REALLY analyze the situation to see if shes right?
Maybe shes not right. Maybe she is. Complicated is right, all relationships are complicated, without a doubt. It could be she feels neglected from the time you spend with your plants. Maybe its not necessarily the time youve spent with the plants, but time that you are not spending with her .. that may have nothing to do with the plants.
Of course .... then again ... many women I know, and have known ... have dreamed about their marriage ... and the resulting family that they will one day have since the time they were little girls. They've had fanatasies about they life they want to have one day. Maybe now that you guys are married, and have childeren ... she is struggiling because the life you both have isnt the life she imagined for herself when she was little.
Cannabis was fun for her once upon a time, she was happy when she got married because maybe... to her it meant the next "phase" of her life ... as it does to so many women. Now shes mad because that phase isnt coming, and your bewildered wondering what the hell is going on .... because she was happy once, and things havent changed so why is she now all of the sudden not happy?
Then again ... its probably neither of those things. Who the hell knows? No one ever will until you ask her. When people have been fighting over a period of time, they both become very defensive, and its hard to get them to drop that defensiveness. Im betting it has something to do with an idea she had in her head about how her life would be when she got married ... but in order for her to open up and tell you the TRUTH. She needs to feel close to you again to reveal something so intamate.
Maybe it wouldnt be a bad idea to stop smoking for awhile, so that you can show her a token of good faith ... and let her know she is important to you and you need to know what about it is really bothering you. Why was it ok early on in our marriage? What is different now that makes it not ok?
I dont know man ... this is just my 2 cents, but do I feel for you. Im in a relationship where I am the one that is unsatisified, but the girl Im with is the single best person I have ever met in my life. So Im going through some soul searching as well, only Im trying to figure out what the hell is wrong with me that I cant be satisfied with this gem of a good hearted person I am privilaged to call my girlfriend... we dont click very well at all, we really dont. Its super unfortunate because as I mentioned she is such a good person its incredible. At the age of 30 you would think I would be able to avoid getting wrapped up into relationships that arent right ... but I guess I havent gotten there yet.
Good luck to you, I hope you can find the common ground you both need.
Wow Ozz
You been posting up a storm with awesome posts, some nice advice dude
CBF, man I hate to read what you are going through, it hurts me reading it. I have a son with my ex wife, and man almost sounds the same as you, we bought a house, I eventually sold it, for just a couple more that what I owed, but she stiffed me on teh mortgage, and left to live elsewhere with my son. I had to move for work, and with all the bills coming in, and the credit cards maxed out, I was about 80 K in debt making 65K.. So basically I had to declare bankruptcy, during my alone, doing every party drug there was and nearly losing that job, I met the girl I am with now, I have been with her for 9 years, she is my best friend, and we will probably be together until one of us gets hit by a bus.
20's is too young to get married, you gotta wait till you 30, you know better than that now, but hey dude, I feel for ya, I have been there
You been posting up a storm with awesome posts, some nice advice dude
CBF, man I hate to read what you are going through, it hurts me reading it. I have a son with my ex wife, and man almost sounds the same as you, we bought a house, I eventually sold it, for just a couple more that what I owed, but she stiffed me on teh mortgage, and left to live elsewhere with my son. I had to move for work, and with all the bills coming in, and the credit cards maxed out, I was about 80 K in debt making 65K.. So basically I had to declare bankruptcy, during my alone, doing every party drug there was and nearly losing that job, I met the girl I am with now, I have been with her for 9 years, she is my best friend, and we will probably be together until one of us gets hit by a bus.
20's is too young to get married, you gotta wait till you 30, you know better than that now, but hey dude, I feel for ya, I have been there
Gracias Dr.
....... I guess Ive been around the block a time or two.
All that really means in the end is I know enough to know that I dont know shit.
lol ...
Ya I hope things get better for you guys, the problem (at least the way I see it) with things like this is you can analyze it until your blue in the face.
Basically she wants you to quite smoking cannabis:
One could argue if you really loved her you would.
One could argue that if she really loved you she never would ask such a thing.
You could say that she was happy with things the way they have been, at one point, so its not fair that she isnt now.
You could also say, how can anyone ever expect things to stay the same, after marriage, so its not fair that you expect them to stay the same.
In the end .... its hard to see the truth in the fog. Its easiest for those close to you to see it though, so maybe talk with someone you trust thats close to you both and see what their opinions are.
Its a dispute, and a compromise needs to be made to keep the peace.
Maybe grow 3 plants and smoke on weekends and she can change her view from not wanting it at all to not minding if its a recreational thing?
Hopefully you guys can find a way ..... or maybe not, and it will be for the best. I really do wish you the best though bud, relationships are hard when they arent going well and both people actually care about the other.
....... I guess Ive been around the block a time or two.
All that really means in the end is I know enough to know that I dont know shit.
lol ...
Ya I hope things get better for you guys, the problem (at least the way I see it) with things like this is you can analyze it until your blue in the face.
Basically she wants you to quite smoking cannabis:
One could argue if you really loved her you would.
One could argue that if she really loved you she never would ask such a thing.
You could say that she was happy with things the way they have been, at one point, so its not fair that she isnt now.
You could also say, how can anyone ever expect things to stay the same, after marriage, so its not fair that you expect them to stay the same.
In the end .... its hard to see the truth in the fog. Its easiest for those close to you to see it though, so maybe talk with someone you trust thats close to you both and see what their opinions are.
Its a dispute, and a compromise needs to be made to keep the peace.
Maybe grow 3 plants and smoke on weekends and she can change her view from not wanting it at all to not minding if its a recreational thing?
Hopefully you guys can find a way ..... or maybe not, and it will be for the best. I really do wish you the best though bud, relationships are hard when they arent going well and both people actually care about the other.
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cbf said:
Does true love last forever? Nothing last forever.
Love is a temporary insanity which is only curable by marriage. However, I guess it's better to have loved and lost than to do 30 years in a Mexican Prison. And as far as marriage goes, I never knew what true happiness was untill I got married. And by then it was too late.
Marrige is alot like a 3 RING Circus: Engagement ring, Wedding ring, and Suffering! Some people say that marriages are made in heaven... But so is lightning & thunder. Its give & take. You better give it to her or her attorneys will take it anyway. Marriage can be very difficult because you have to deal with feelings, lawyers, and what not.
If your going to get married. I suggest getting married early in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you havent wasted the whole day. Personally, I will never get married again. I would rather just find a lady that I dont like, buy her a house, and send her money every month.
Good luck with all of that anyway.
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damn cbf, your life sounds so similar to the one i had with my first wife. now that shes a full fledged whore, my only mission in life is to get my kids from her.
when she asked me to leave by having one of my good friends escort me out of our apartment i was at a all time low, and that just made things worse for me. couldnt find work to save my life, the lady and the job center knew me and my kids, thats how bad it was.
there were always other guys looming in the background, she was always weak minded and a "people pleaser". every time someone figured out what type of person she was, they either ridiculed her or tried to help her or just flat out tried their best to take advantage. i realize now that i fell in love fast and hard. .. kinda like the challenger on re-entry type fast. in the beginning wehad a plan and we were for each other, even my mom was willing to help because she realized we were young, and her parents werent worth shit in that area.
i always thought it was strange that her mother planned out wedding in a week!! complete with guests and all, no one really from my side. on the dance floor, my mother told her mother something and she responded with " oh shes all yours now!!" . . . around about the 4th year of our marriage i knew what that statement meant. thats when the guys started mysteriously appearing but she never did anything, or rather as she puts it " you never caught me with anyone else, so you cant say that". and everything that has happened to her is my fault, but let her tell the story and shes never done anything wrong. blameless to the end.
i hated her the most because i felt and saw that she destroyed a very valid, lucrative and attainable dream i had to have my own family. i didn't want riches or fame, just the things that i knew would have made me happy. i always thought i could/should wait, but when she came along everything felt so right, and she made it all seem so doable in the now.. . . my first experience with every being a " meal ticket". now i just hate her cause she alwasy, ALWAYS tryin to twist around the court order to suite her own needs and try to make rules up as we go. she still doesn't get that im not that guy anymore
my wife now. . .. .although she gets on my nerves, she is the best thing since cooked food. and i dont think i could have done any better.
i was just glad that i was not too mentally or socially distraught to not be able to come out of it all, realizing that my dream was MINE and no one elses but that there was someone out there that believes in family the way i do. i saw marriage for what it was and realized that its a blissful thing as long as its done with the right two people.
if you realize that there is nothing left and it makes no sense then you guys need to just call it a day. make sure the kids are in the best situation for them, either with you or her. but if anything i can tell you from my experience is , dont let this time ruin what you may want out of life as far as marriage
if your looking for that chick that you saw in your wife before she changed, then it can be had! hell if yoru wife wants she can even go and find that "stick up the ass/ conservative/ republican prick" that she seems to want instead of your cannabis smoking growing ass. i mean god forbid you can medicate yourself and keep the medical drug monkeys off your back.
**(there are some people that dont have a choice, but you others. . .ya'll sit back and keep thinkin that these drugs that these hospitals are pushin to you are the best thing for you. . .you just go ahead and read that lil pamphlet they come with and see what the side affects are! believe you me, youll never want to take, not so much as an aspirin or tylenol before you get half way through!!!)
older is wiser, if one has been paying attention along the way. dont take things to personal, just analyze situations, learn whatever pro's and con's you can and keep it movin'!! dont let it stop u. when my shit ended , as bad as it was, i cried for three days straight, thought of suicide at some points (btw, you guys on here are the only ones that know that lil tid bit), was with a fine ass chick on a Caribbean island that would have done a one night stand and was too distraught to even think about it (believe me, once me and that chick talked about that shit, i tried , lord knows i tried, but i fell into the freind zone to be trapped forever).
be you cause thats all you can do, dont change for anyone, especially if its taken you so long to get to the point/level of self love that you are at. thats a precious thing that most people use surgery or money or both to try to get. you grew into it and realized it so its yours!!! let no one rob you of that!!! kids, wife, GF, parents, friends, job, boss. .. .. I MEAN NO ONE!!!
so trust me bruh, your not alone! if i had to do things differently i would have rented a pick up truck so i could lay in the back on a bright moonlit night, found a field, smoke up atleast 3 fat ass blunts (full length dutche's!!), had a couple beers or a drink of some sort and lawyered up as if i were putting on the armor of GOD!!! so theres a lil hint for ya
i would tell you to try counseling since it does helpbut it just seems to me at this point, its all said and done, especially since you to have out grown each other
when she asked me to leave by having one of my good friends escort me out of our apartment i was at a all time low, and that just made things worse for me. couldnt find work to save my life, the lady and the job center knew me and my kids, thats how bad it was.
there were always other guys looming in the background, she was always weak minded and a "people pleaser". every time someone figured out what type of person she was, they either ridiculed her or tried to help her or just flat out tried their best to take advantage. i realize now that i fell in love fast and hard. .. kinda like the challenger on re-entry type fast. in the beginning wehad a plan and we were for each other, even my mom was willing to help because she realized we were young, and her parents werent worth shit in that area.
i always thought it was strange that her mother planned out wedding in a week!! complete with guests and all, no one really from my side. on the dance floor, my mother told her mother something and she responded with " oh shes all yours now!!" . . . around about the 4th year of our marriage i knew what that statement meant. thats when the guys started mysteriously appearing but she never did anything, or rather as she puts it " you never caught me with anyone else, so you cant say that". and everything that has happened to her is my fault, but let her tell the story and shes never done anything wrong. blameless to the end.
i hated her the most because i felt and saw that she destroyed a very valid, lucrative and attainable dream i had to have my own family. i didn't want riches or fame, just the things that i knew would have made me happy. i always thought i could/should wait, but when she came along everything felt so right, and she made it all seem so doable in the now.. . . my first experience with every being a " meal ticket". now i just hate her cause she alwasy, ALWAYS tryin to twist around the court order to suite her own needs and try to make rules up as we go. she still doesn't get that im not that guy anymore
my wife now. . .. .although she gets on my nerves, she is the best thing since cooked food. and i dont think i could have done any better.
i was just glad that i was not too mentally or socially distraught to not be able to come out of it all, realizing that my dream was MINE and no one elses but that there was someone out there that believes in family the way i do. i saw marriage for what it was and realized that its a blissful thing as long as its done with the right two people.
if you realize that there is nothing left and it makes no sense then you guys need to just call it a day. make sure the kids are in the best situation for them, either with you or her. but if anything i can tell you from my experience is , dont let this time ruin what you may want out of life as far as marriage
if your looking for that chick that you saw in your wife before she changed, then it can be had! hell if yoru wife wants she can even go and find that "stick up the ass/ conservative/ republican prick" that she seems to want instead of your cannabis smoking growing ass. i mean god forbid you can medicate yourself and keep the medical drug monkeys off your back.
**(there are some people that dont have a choice, but you others. . .ya'll sit back and keep thinkin that these drugs that these hospitals are pushin to you are the best thing for you. . .you just go ahead and read that lil pamphlet they come with and see what the side affects are! believe you me, youll never want to take, not so much as an aspirin or tylenol before you get half way through!!!)
older is wiser, if one has been paying attention along the way. dont take things to personal, just analyze situations, learn whatever pro's and con's you can and keep it movin'!! dont let it stop u. when my shit ended , as bad as it was, i cried for three days straight, thought of suicide at some points (btw, you guys on here are the only ones that know that lil tid bit), was with a fine ass chick on a Caribbean island that would have done a one night stand and was too distraught to even think about it (believe me, once me and that chick talked about that shit, i tried , lord knows i tried, but i fell into the freind zone to be trapped forever).
be you cause thats all you can do, dont change for anyone, especially if its taken you so long to get to the point/level of self love that you are at. thats a precious thing that most people use surgery or money or both to try to get. you grew into it and realized it so its yours!!! let no one rob you of that!!! kids, wife, GF, parents, friends, job, boss. .. .. I MEAN NO ONE!!!
so trust me bruh, your not alone! if i had to do things differently i would have rented a pick up truck so i could lay in the back on a bright moonlit night, found a field, smoke up atleast 3 fat ass blunts (full length dutche's!!), had a couple beers or a drink of some sort and lawyered up as if i were putting on the armor of GOD!!! so theres a lil hint for ya
i would tell you to try counseling since it does helpbut it just seems to me at this point, its all said and done, especially since you to have out grown each other
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very cool posts
thanks for sharing your experiences
a lot to learn from
especially for us youngs boys that haven't had our dreams broken yet
thanks for sharing your experiences
a lot to learn from
especially for us youngs boys that haven't had our dreams broken yet
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When I was mature enough, and didn't waste my time on easy pussy anymore, I found my soulmate. Marriage is more about friendship than sex, people who are comfortable with their own emotions and are sensitive to others emotions will have a much easier time finding and keeping true love.
If you simply see marriage as owning pussy, or economic stability, you will probably never find "true" love, or make it last. Remember marriage is older than any government or certificate they hand out, it is not a institution of the state.
If you simply see marriage as owning pussy, or economic stability, you will probably never find "true" love, or make it last. Remember marriage is older than any government or certificate they hand out, it is not a institution of the state.
Can you make true love last forever?
Only if you keep finding new reasons to remind you BOTH why you fell in love in the first place!
Only if you keep finding new reasons to remind you BOTH why you fell in love in the first place!
C
cbf
Ozz thanks so much for your time and knowledge. Yes I have had this similar conversation over the last 8 years or so. It's obvious and she said it clearly she is prejudiced against Cannabis to the point where even tho she will smoke on occasion, she admits hypocrisy when she demonizes my use of the herb daily. I have used Cannabis since I was 13 initially for recreational reasons and now for various physical, mental, inspirational and always recreational purposes, because I enjoy the flavor and effects. I've had and still have conditions which allow a doctor to recommend it's use and supervises my use of it. It is one thing in life that makes me happy and makes me feel alive and at peace. I've stopped using cannabis on various occasions to satisfy her prejudice in the past, but I always end up feeling like I'm neglecting an important part of what makes me happy, and what should not be a big issue for anyone if the negative effects are nonexistant..The more I see friends and innocent people being victimized, ridiculed and mistreated by society in general for Cannabis use, the more I am revolted against the prejudice, We are opposites now. It's no longer an option. She is prejudiced and always will be I unfortunately think..
Dr, Dog, you give me great hope, I'll skip the party drugs, since I've done alot of those, I haven't drank one glass of alcohol since this went down close to New years tho, ironic huh, she doesn't mind alcohol, and got faaaded at New Year..ergh
Ozz it's time we separate and she re-evaluate what she wants in life I believe, I agree with the "find your republican with a stick u p the ass theory" if it makes her happy and brings back that person full of energy and life, I'll be happy.
Thanks trouble,
My guess is to go into relationships with super low expectations then huh..
MY HEART IS SCREAMING THIS, I can't lie to myself and think I'll change her back to who she used to be..and I refuse to change what I believe in, and Cannabis happens to be the Healing of the Nation IMHO..
She may find happiness with one and if she does, GOOD RIDDANCE, those people are what my parents represent and it makes me kind of sick how they generalize and categorize and are prejudiced against MJ..
v
Whiterabbit9 you've been very kind and helping, thank you so much for your helpful words..it means the world to me, you went out of your way and you deserve the best man.
Can't they use the pussy alot too tho? LOL I've been so deprived for so long, it's stupid..very wise words though, almost more than I can fathom at the moment..
This thread has brought me a little sun in this storm, thank you all so much. I didn't want to post a Yummybud thread because it's embarassing to talk about this crap to total strangers specially for a tough big guy like me LOLOLOLOL snif Wahahaahah
Anyway, I now realize why people hate Yummybud so much. I thought I would get at least 1 or 2 trolls making fun of me like they do to Yummy. However I am so amazed that I have gotten such awesome and caring responses and advice. Believe me, it's helping me listen to my heart, in the midst of chaos. When Yummy gets advice he igores it, keeps on with seemingly BS for days and never gets the clue, then people realize he's fake and they get mad...
The Post above by Resinryder is short but so concise and summarized that it was the perfect lead in to my analysis of this dilemma I'm in.
What would make us remember the first day we fell in love and the reasons why we fell in love. Well, I used to train a couple sports pretty hard, I was in top shape, young, used Cannabis and we were attracted to each other's looks. She always followed me wherever I went and did things with me like running, etc, but what I most enjoyed about her was that she put up withg my BS and I put up with hers. She was ok with me smoking herb (she did too) my exploits to waterfalls, caves, jungle, sports etc, I on the other hand was happy and responsible. I got a job as soon as she got pregnant, cut my hair for the job, took her in to live at my house, moved to an apartment, taught her english (yes I made her do homework etc) mind you she's from a different country, gave up my youth basically so we could have that dream of a family.
So, looking back, now she no longer accepts herb to the point where she is prejudiced against it and anyone associated. She says all my friends are only friends because of it (I've known many of them for over 20 years lol)
She no longer cares about looks, she has not controlled her diet or exercised to stay thin for years saying that "you have to deal with it anbd love me how I am, I'm not 16 anymore " ...so we really have lost alot that we had..
This thread is making me answer my own questions and realize that I need to listen to my heart. My brain says "It can work", my heart says "It won't work"
Thank You all for being so kind at this crazy moment...
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cbf
well, she's now getting mean and bitchy instead of trying to see through the mess. I am trying really hard to be nice and careful of every move. I want this to be amicable and not turn into a child custody war and divorce. I continue smoking herb as needed, and have started smoking outside just to not piss her off, but show her I am going about my life at the same time. The more I see how she reacts and what she says, the more I'm thinking we may never re-connect. She is going to have to embrace the whole change in routine and separation (I do not see it working if we don't take some time apart to reflect and think about the future)
If she cannot see through the Cannabis smoke and vape, to realize our problems stem from many other issues also, then we will never be at peace. Today I woke up with a migraine.
Last night I laid out a plan for her to be able to quit her job and study full time, be a house mom, and focus on her happiness, mind and body. I told her this way , she would be able to think if I am really the man for her and if Cannabis really is the end-all-be-all.
I'm going home sick, I need to sleep, haven't gotten more than 4 hours of sleep every night, at least I'm taking care of the babies still..
God's Gift in the White pots and Purple Candy (purple pheno LA Confidential?) in the black pots, she hates them , I love them, they are from APE:
Here's what I'm smoking:
Mendocino Cheese, this herb is phenomenal, reminds me of a mix of Super Silver Haze and Thai Haze. It's rediculously frosty, sticky, and the effect is very very strong. I have a couple newby friends that are scared of this herb, in a good way, they just get very medicated. She wants me to give up what took me 15 years to achieve..good luck:
If she cannot see through the Cannabis smoke and vape, to realize our problems stem from many other issues also, then we will never be at peace. Today I woke up with a migraine.
Last night I laid out a plan for her to be able to quit her job and study full time, be a house mom, and focus on her happiness, mind and body. I told her this way , she would be able to think if I am really the man for her and if Cannabis really is the end-all-be-all.
I'm going home sick, I need to sleep, haven't gotten more than 4 hours of sleep every night, at least I'm taking care of the babies still..
God's Gift in the White pots and Purple Candy (purple pheno LA Confidential?) in the black pots, she hates them , I love them, they are from APE:
Here's what I'm smoking:
Mendocino Cheese, this herb is phenomenal, reminds me of a mix of Super Silver Haze and Thai Haze. It's rediculously frosty, sticky, and the effect is very very strong. I have a couple newby friends that are scared of this herb, in a good way, they just get very medicated. She wants me to give up what took me 15 years to achieve..good luck:
