Why do women listen to their friends?

[Trying-to-blend]

I just got dumped not 24 hours ago.

Why?

Because her friends said i wasn't good enough for her. Not attractive enough, not rich enough. This coming from ho's that have kids sicne thy were 17 and who are NOT married, and the one taht is, is married to a janitor(no offense to any janitors out there, i worked as one once).

I'm fucking studying to become a lawyer, I work at a great job, i have clothed and fed her for years, i have supported her in EVERYTHING she's done. Even then, i'm not the possessive "my woman shouldn't work" type. I helped her find a job, and even pointed out that if she wanted, she could contribute to the household, but that she shouldn't worry about the bills, that she could use the money to buy her little things. I was even going to pay for her college.

When she asked me if we would ever get married some months ago i replied "february is jsut around the corner". I never hit her, i never insulted her(although i did yell at her a bit, when we got into an argument, but she understands that it's because of my family upbringing and that i was actively trying to change that, going to therapy and shit).

I really feel like i did everything right, yet her friend's influenced her so much, she said she hates me. Taht's less than 5 horus after the last tiem she said she loved me. I'm still trying to realize what the fuck happenned.

Shit, i've never felt like this before. I'm kinda the keep the distance guy, because i've been hurt many times before, but with her... i told her everything. she's the only one that knows exactly WHY i am the way i am... the only one tha tknows what happened to me when i was a young'in. The only one who knows how heavy my mask is.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

I'm stil ltrying to come to grips with the fact that what i thought was going to be my life is over. Please guys, some words of encouragement. just DON'T call her a btich, a ho, a slut or any other derogatory comment. She's not... I know she's not... I don't hate her for leaving me, i really don't, even if i don't understand the reasoning behind it. I just wish her the best, and i wish she wouldnt' say she hates me, without giving me a reason. I love her, dammit.

 

[Stoner4Life]

You're a victim of typical chick behavior as they just:
Can't
Understand
Normal
Thinking

 

[EatShitake]

If those are the types of friends she keeps, bro, I say you are MUUUUUUCH better off today than you were yesterday! You should thank her for the illumination.

Chin up, now!

 

[Trying-to-blend]

Stoner, i've always liked you and your humour, and i knwo you're tring to cheer me up, but please, don't insult her. This is the ONLY woman i've been with that actually treated me with respect and dignity. I'd appreciate if NO one used derogatory remarks, please?

btw, you were right... from the karma you sent me i mean, i am a returning member. gotta keep any lurking leos in the dark, ya know?

 

[Stoner4Life]

just DON'T call her a btich, a ho, a slut or any other derogatory comment. She's not... I know she's not...

what I said holds true & I didn't actually call her that, I just felt I needed to remind you what you've blinded yourself to for too long.......


loving you one minute and then hating you the very next,
does that even sound close to
Normal
Thinking?

I still think and say not.......



EDIT: You know no offense bro.
I was married once (ONCE!) and swore off that shit forever, just like you TBB I let her keep her paycheck for whatever she wanted to burn it on, I worked 6/7 days a week to support 2 cars and rented a nice home (glad I didn't buy!). When we were going through tough times we were seeing a marriage counselor, he doubled as our divorce counselor soon after....... she made a list of half of everything, I blew up like a mad mofo in his office then and there and she settled for EXACTLY what I told her I'd give her. Fuck 'em!

 

[Trying-to-blend]

I'm actually crying right now man...

ME the guy that has had a gun in his mouth(put there by himself cause i told the fucker if you gonna shoot me, do it right)

the guy that has told women to fuck off, i don't want a blowjob from you.

the guy that is supposedly the perfect poker face, the spin doctor, the king of the assholes.

dammit

i let myself fall in love, i gave her my all. li NEVER EVER mistreated her, i loved her every day, and let her know it. I was open about everything, kept no secrets from her. NEVER forgot a single anniversary(well, we technically just had two, but i also kinda did something special for first kiss and other lil things like that women supposedly like).


dammit dammit dammit dammmit dammit dammit dammiitttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt


you guys think a shroom trip may help?

 

[Space Toker]

From your opening statement, she seems like she was just using you and had a leash around your nuts. Maybe she loved you, but if she gives up on you that easily, I think she just loved what you did for her and all that your money bought her. Trust me, you don't need her kind, you can do far better.

 

[og dmc]

You're a victim of typical chick behavior as they just:
Can't
Understand
Normal
Thinking

Garry busey is that you. You r doing well on celebrity rehab. Hang in there

 

[GrüneErd]

damn man, never tell a woman/girl everything.

see what happens, something like this could go down and you won't even have time to think about how it happened, you'll be in jail if it has anything to do with your grow. sittin there feelin dooped.

i hope she don't know about that..

but honestly man, that's one of the most horrible feelings and i hope things get better for you (which they will, only with the aid of time elapsed). pitty ganja doesnt usually help enough in situations on this level.

showing my plants love when im hurt always helps me. them and my mom are the only ones i truly love and tell most everything (still not everything, even the plants lol) to.

feel better man,
peace.

 

[GrüneErd]

forgot to add, DONT TRIP SHROOMS.

IMO. this situation is flooding your mind right now, i know how that shit is, every thought. doubt you could deal with that well while trippin, just me, im prone to bad trips in situations like that.

peace.

 

[og dmc]

she will probably be back

 

[stinkyattic]

You're a victim of typical chick behavior as they just:
Can't
Understand
Normal
Thinking

Dude seriously, SO not cool. Not only in this thread/scenario, but in general. SO not cool.

To the OP- You're being a big pushover in all of this. MAn up and be all, "Pfffft YOU'RE too good for ME?! No, I'M too good for YOU." Even if you don't feel that way.
See, one of two things happened here:
Option A: She was already thinking of breaking up, or unhappy, or whatever and her friends could tell. She told them, or they just sensed it, no matter, it was her choice and they supported her in it.
Option B: She is still a silly immature schoolgirl when it comes to making her own choices and her bitchy jealous friends got pissed that she is on track to be doing better than them, and thye think that when she's all college edumacated, she won't talk to them any more, or some shit like that, so they are trying to sabotage it. And she let them. Which makes them evil and her dumb.

The moral of this story is:
Next time around, get to know The Girlfriends early in the relationship and treat it like meeting her family, because if they are nice sweet ladies (mother hens) who are protective of their girl, they will appreciate that you take the time to get to know them, and if it turns out that they are just evil chickenheads from another dimension you'll figure it out. After all.. birds of a feather flock together...

 

[Stoner4Life]

she will probably be back

but should he allow himself to be used as a doormat again?
it's going to be that much easier for her to leave a 2nd time,
& from love to hate in minutes? that's ditzy behavior at best.
ditzy being confused nothing more but addressed in a way
that just creates more confusion and bad feelings (not hate)
in its wake, how to trust a girl like that again?

 

[killedkilleryo]

girls will always be lookin for something better its a part of there nature just like a lioness will always accept a new male that defeated the ruling lion of there pride. women are just programmed that way just like men are programmed to want to screw any women thats attractive enough.i think humans mask there true nature with the thing we call "relationships"

 

[Vash]

The boy has been bit by the "love bug". Fuck you up, won't it? you don't know your ass from a hole in the ground now, do you? Don't know which way to turn, can tell it by your writing "damn,damn, fuck, fuck". Listen at you. You know why you feelin' like that? Because you gave all of your heart away. When you do that, you got NO control of yourself. Besides that, you let yourself go for somebody who gets influenced by what YOU call "hos". Now you got the nerve to tell us not to call that HO of yours one. GET REAL!! I got NO pity for your ass. The way I see it, "birds of a feather flock together". Now if you can call your ladies friends "Hos", what the hell does that make your lady? Talk to me. What you need to do is get your head out of your ass- no, HER ass - and snatch your heart back. Get control of yourself, and move the fuck on. If you haven't realized by now what a lot of smart folks here have already told you, it means you don't want to. With all you SAY you got going on, and all you've done for her, I can only figure that you are one ugly MF and she looks half ass okay. You might be pussy whipped for all I know. Just keeping it real. Peace.

 

[whiterabbit9]

THREAD ENDS HERE.

 

[happyherb]

without writing a page or 2 (im sick)...

if she can give up on you now..look ten years ahead and the dozens and dozens of times just like this one .....do you like it now??? its gona happen again if you are to get back together .....plus your really gona dislike here friends lol....trust me im visulising my own life and ppl telling me the same as your being told....same sorta deal ppl didnt know her just what i was telling them......i spent many long years from the start thinking about what i wanted and not what i was getting..

...i have to deal with my ex twice a week cause of the kids.....couldnt tell ya what she looks like or what she said dont care no more....

MAN ...I WASTED A LOT OF TIME NOT LISTENING !!!. HH.=]-~

 

[glock23]

Don't let her know you're stressing. I bet being with you will drive her nuts too. BTW, you treat her too damn well. You shouldn't be supporting her in entirety. I'd never do that for any woman who was capable of supporting herself. IMO *you're* too good for her. lol.

I know exactly how you feel, but be cool and think this through. I had something similar happen to me last year. Now I don't want any kind of relationship again. lol. Every time something like this happens, my standards just get higher.

 

[ConceptOfSleep]

To the OP- You're being a big pushover in all of this. MAn up and be all, "Pfffft YOU'RE too good for ME?! No, I'M too good for YOU." Even if you don't feel that way.
See, one of two things happened here:
Option A: She was already thinking of breaking up, or unhappy, or whatever and her friends could tell. She told them, or they just sensed it, no matter, it was her choice and they supported her in it.
Option B: She is still a silly immature schoolgirl when it comes to making her own choices and her bitchy jealous friends got pissed that she is on track to be doing better than them, and thye think that when she's all college edumacated, she won't talk to them any more, or some shit like that, so they are trying to sabotage it. And she let them. Which makes them evil and her dumb.

The moral of this story is:
Next time around, get to know The Girlfriends early in the relationship and treat it like meeting her family, because if they are nice sweet ladies (mother hens) who are protective of their girl, they will appreciate that you take the time to get to know them, and if it turns out that they are just evil chickenheads from another dimension you'll figure it out. After all.. birds of a feather flock together...

TtB, I think StinkyAttic hit the nail on the head here man... If her friends were able to sway her so easily she was already either thinking of breaking up with you, or is so immature that she will follow the crowd despite what her heart tells her...

Either way, and I know this is the biggest cliche in the book, there are plenty of fish in the sea...

I've been where you are right now emotionally, and it sucks big time, it sure does. But the old addage that time heals all wounds is absolutely true. Im not gonna tell you to go out there and get with as many chicks as humanly possible to try to forget about her, cuz that probably wont help much in the end anyway... But what I will say is that you should do what you can to keep yourself and your mind occupied. Go for a bike ride, start goin to the gym, focus more on your garden, write some poetry, read a good book, go do things with some of your guy friends who have probably be wondering where you have been since you got the GF...

My point is that life goes on, and while it hurts now (especially since it seems you were so into her that you considered proposing) that hurt will fade. Take this experience and learn from it.

The one good thing about every failed relationship is that helps you to learn what you DON'T want in a significant other.

Things will look up...In the meantime find a new hobby so you arent sitting around sulking in your own private pitty party, smoke some good herb and enjoy finding yourself for a bit. You need to be happy about yourself before you can be happy about someone else.

I just hope that you will take some of the advice many of us have given you...Don't be like Yummy and just ask for advice only to ignore it and take it to new levels of unnecessary drama.

Good luck bro.

 

[CarlWeathers]

you guys think a shroom trip may help?

Absolutely not. Too much emotion running through you. If you eat shrooms she will be all over your mind.

Don't fret too much because your position of power will be back. Like others said she will be back. From the sound of it she'll realize it before long what she just said bye to. Make sure you take full advantage of that position no matter whether you take her back or not. Make her CLEARLY see the stupidity of her ways.