Planning out your life?

[thekingofNY]

WARNING: thinking might be required ahead...if you can't read a page in a book you probably want to go to the next post and just skip this....

The more I try to do this, the more I let myself down... Maybe its just I plan or expect way to much? I dunno... but by now I know I wanted to at least be engaged... this all comes not more than 4 months after i left my ex after she cheated on me. Did i mention women=trouble, sorry ladies, nothing personal but I find the majority of women to be trouble, however the ones that are reading this are probably not in the majority...

Nikki sixx (Motley crue) couldnt have been more right when he wrote that shiat in his diary...its definitely one of those love/hate relationships though in that your damned if you do and damned if you don't. I recently read the heroin diaries by Nikki and was impressed...(I normally am not much of a reader, I can read/comprehend very fast, but never really got pleasure out of reading, but this was an interesting book)

I feel like its the exact same sort of thing with a job...
I mean I ended up where I am today by total accident; nothing special although I managed to find a job I actually enjoy going to 9/10 days , I also make nearly as much money as my parents and I dont even have a degree...I didn't plan on that JOB AT ALL... I totally went into the situation with my an attitude of "I am just going to have a ton of fun at work" , ended up really liking the place/management, I am fairly certain I could burn one down with our president or my immediate boss.

I put my pot charges on my application when I applied, my boss knows I smoke. These are all things I always dreamed of and tried my hardest to "find" so to speak when I got out of high school....it never happened until I gave up one day and just said fuck it, I am just going to go with the flow for once... I ended up taking a chance with a complete stranger and leaving everything and everyone i knew... it was the best fucking choice I ever made in my whole life. Sure if i could go back now I would do somethings differently, but I would still do it all again... wouldn't change that for the world.

Anyways , back to my original question, Is it even possible to plan out your life just the way you want it? I am in my mid 20s, but I already am thinking its not, and if you try you are just headed for disappointment. I sure as fuck didnt plan this shiat; being in a "strange" city so to speak in that I have no family or close friends here, living with 2 female roomates who are a few years older than me that i barely know? With a car I got from the ex i moved up here to be with and it didnt work out? Thankfully i have mary jane and all the people that love her. I find she tends to bring us together ...

I mean obviously I would love to meet another cute awesome stranger from some far away city that I had perfect chemistry with and wanted to pay for me to move across the country again, but obviously the odds on that happening again are not too good... So I dont know what to do, I don't really have any motivation to date again, when I met my ex I thought it was going to be a total one night stand thing, but then her crazy ass payed for me to fly up here to visit and i liked it...I really was not that attracted to her, but I just went with it and ended up moving up here and having a great time over the past few years and falling in love with her in the process and also meeting a ton of cool ass people along the way.

So what do I do? I was at a bar tonight eating and drinking with a friend and there is no way in hell I am going to go try to find my next future wife at a fucking bar, I know the problem is I am looking at it from that point of view (potential wife), but its hard not too.

I know one thing for sure, my next relationship will have to be with a girl that smokes and loves to smoke as much as I...this past one wasn't, well she did a few times a year, but it wasn't really her cup of tea. What to do? I know I am going to find what I am looking for when I least expect it and knowing that fucking BLOWS! I want to go find her damit.

 

[Haps]

OK, here ya go, if you smile at work, you are ahead of most of america, ya can not buy that, it is , or is not.

Women fuck and suck ya just like ya want them to, until you marry them, then they fuck and suck you in an entirely different way.

There are no do overs.

H

 

[FarmerJoe]

Marriage is just an institution, just spend time with the people who make you happy the most. And if you can find a person who understands that, you've probably found a very special girl.

 

[The_Leader]

if u do the math. a hookers cheaper and u get exactly what you want.

just saying

 

[thekingofNY]

OK, here ya go, if you smile at work, you are ahead of most of america, ya can not buy that, it is , or is not.

Women fuck and suck ya just like ya want them to, until you marry them, then they fuck and suck you in an entirely different way.

There are no do overs.

H

Thats what everyone keeps telling me about the job... its the only reason i stayed. I guess on the bright side I didnt have any kids, but I just hate the idea of not really being in control of my life, however I have a feeling thats the way it has to be...

The Leader, I was a finance major back when I went to college... I know I know, I have done the math multiple times, I remember last vday in particular...shiat cost me way over 500 bucks, thats TWO hookers for a fucking hour....

Or if you factor in the mind games....this is the reason I didnt feel any guilt walking away from my relationship with a car, however I still will give her the money for it some day...it was nothing special by a long shot, but hey its works...knocks on wood.

Have a good day everyone, I am going to that place that I dont mind being... its sad in that I have come to not even look forward to the weekends except for the sleeping in... although at the same time its not like I am at work giving 120%... more like 75.

 

[G. Sensi]

How u doing King?

I would 'ASS oUt of ME' that some of your anger or ill feelings toward women is bc of your recent situation... and its cool to vent and be angry...I know first hand what you're going thru (Well she didnt cheat, but one day out the blue she said goodbye)...

But remember every woman is someones Mom, or Sister, or Daughter, or Aunt or even grandma... and Im sure you are just as willing as I am to lay any m'fucka out for disrespecting anyone in our fam's... so we gotta be wary of the vibes we put out in the world... U cant throw the stone you may one day end up catching...

Women are beautiful... but some of them are just little girls who wanna have fun... you'll learn the difference between the two as time goes on...

Im sure you dont think about that girl you had a crush on in grade 6 anymore or the one from senior year of high school... and five years from now, you'll feel the same about your current ex... So dont worry, better things are coming

To get back to your question,

Simple answer.... No... You cant plan out your life, you got very little control over it... So just have fun while you're here and try to make it last as long as possible...

Long and complicated answer.... You hav no more control over your life than the control you have over whether you were born male or female, or black/white, or in US or UK, healthy/deformed etc... You have no more control over your life then you have control over your heart beat or breathing... If you've ever tried to pull all nighters, you know that eventually you HAVE to sleep whether you want to or not.... In a lot of these ways, you have no control ...

As u probably just went thru, you cant MAKE anyone fall in love with you, or prevent people from judging you and hating you for the ganja you smoke... But you do have control over who YOU love and you can choose to accept the things other people do in the world that 'arent your cup of tea'... that way you dont make the same mistake your ex did...

You may not be able to get the job you want, but whats stopping you from maybe taking a few business courses and being able to open and run your own company that does the same thing? You could even do it better...

You may live where ever you were born, but whats stopping you from packin up and movin to Amsterdam where you can smoke all damn day?

You may not be able to control alot of things and then therefore plan out your life... but being too rigid and stuck to some plan will cause you to snap... the CN tower in toronto (worlds tallest building) sways as much as a meter in each direction... So you gotta be able to sway as well... enjoy it when the weather is good, but be adaptable and able to fight thru any storm..

Chin up, Head HIGH brother

-G. Sensi

 

[hydroclops]

Hey king I agree with haps on the job front, if you enjoy your job then half the battle in life is won.

On the relashinship side this is something you will know when it happens, you can't rush it.
I did not get married untill I was 25 and have been married for 20 years this past nov.
It may sound corny as hell to most, but you will know it as soon as you see her.

As far as planning out you life, IMHO there are to many variables to life to ever try to do that, unless you are born with a silver spoon in your mouth.

Stay safe and high.
.........HYDRO........

 

[NorCalFor20]

look at it this way: i am 20 already had 6 jobs and couldn't keep any of them long enough to make more than 7.25 and hated every single one of them, at least you got it better than me....

Right now I am looking into going to college. But the only thing is i don't know what I want to do....

Well I know what I want to do but it isn't a job I can get... I've always wanted to be a med grower back in cali... or a video game designer even though I have the skills the chances of landing a job like that are 1 in 1,000,000 maybe im just a video game nerd. I can build computers and have the ablility to build the same computer dell makes for 1,200 dollars for 600 bucks but no one wants to trust the little guy...even though the little guy is the only tech support in the world that speaks english and don't read advice out of a "computers for dummies book"

but instead of doing the computer thing I have been a grocery store cashier, a restraunt cook, a computer store/ retail warehouse worker (closest i've came close to landing the computer-field job i wanted there) then gas station cashier (decided my life wasn't worth a the money in the register if the day ever came + i was tired of getting cussed out for something that had nothing to do with me. And I'm not going to even start to talk about girls/women......


enough rambling about me! .... I hope you can find what you are here to do and better luck in days to come!

 

[bagseed77]

want to make God laugh , tell him your plans , LOL

love never happens when you look for it.

if a girl sleeps with you on the first date, your not special , shes a ho!

if you have a job you somewhat like , keep it forever

 

[panopticist]

If you knew what was coming next, I imagine that life would be much less interesting...

As for the whole 'special lady' angle, don't look for love. You won't find it.
It will find you the minute you quit looking...

 

[Orangecrush]

When I was younger, I always felt that I wanted to be married by my mid twenties as well. Now that I am in my early twenties, I don't think I'll be ready for something like that for atleast another 8 to 10 years. I just have too much going on with life right now. Maybe it's because you are already in an established career (by the way, what do you do exactly?) but, take it as a hidden blessing I'd say. When it happens, it happens and when it does you'll more than likely be happy that you hadn't done it so soon.

 

[thekingofNY]

Thanks guys/girls... this was exactly what I needed...just some nice positive words of encouragement.... for those of you that didn't read my whole post, you didn't catch the part in that I said know i can't go looking for love, and I am starting to think almost everything in life in like that...(you can't go looking for it)

NorCal: not so fast there man... like I said, I am in my mid 20's, however with my birthday a few weeks ago i just realized I have been working for 10 years already! So Technically it took me about ~15 jobs and 8 years to find this one... however out of those 15, probably 10 of them were shiatty telemarketing companies i worked at in high school and the year after...some of them were only for a few days/weeks.

If money is what you want, go do telemarketing, it sucks ass, but most of the time its a free for all for who can get the most wasted in a night; we used to go out on breaks and smoke with our boss, hell we sold him his green... I don't even want to get started on all the "other" things we did, christ I should have been dead twice
Telemarketing you are pretty much guaranteed 9-10$ an hour, even in the South...you should be able to find a place that pays 12-30 depending on how well you can sell shiat to people on the phone... it gets boring really quickly, but its decent money for no degree and great fun if you have friends to do it with.

bagseed, she didnt sleep with me on the first date actually, she made me wait till the 2nd, and at that point I was litterally 15 beers deep, she was still down south on vacation where I lived, and I never thought i was going to see her again, but she ended up coming to my friends house...I was soo drunk I fell over/ontop of her multiple times and then we just gave up Or at least thats the parts of the story I remember and the part she tells me (i dont remember falling over damit!)

Yea I am quite the catch. I am having a much better day today, in that I woke up in my babies were looking a tad bit better than yesterday, and the day before! I also am going to a concert tonight at 11, how I will survive at work tommorow, I dunno, but I'll worry about that in the morning... there is two opening acts that I dont care about, and the doors dont even open till 8, so the first act is on at 9 ... on the bright side, like i told my ex, whom i am going with, we have plenty of time to pregame at a cheaper bar or at home.

We are still "friends" and most of the time its okay, but sometimes it drives me insane...I have yet to decide if the possible benefits in the future outweigh the negatives now? Thoughts on this people? The remaining friends with her part...., I mean i have already experienced some "benefits" like I posted in that other guys thread that his g/f had left him after 2 years:

I have spent the night at her house multiple times over the past few weeks, in the process I have learned that durex makes a condom that is alot better than all other condoms, I work sometimes at a place that has free condoms, so I have tried out alot of different ones in the past 3 months.
Also, condoms suck...but everyone knows that.

 

[RudolfTheRed]

look at it this way: i am 20 already had 6 jobs and couldn't keep any of them long enough to make more than 7.25 and hated every single one of them, at least you got it better than me....

What kind of shit jobs do you keep applying for?

I quit school at 17 and when I started working construction I started out at 10 an hour and I was making 20 hrs. of overtime a week which is time and a half (15 an hour). I was bringing home bigger pay checks then my parents and every single friend I had at the time. I also learned some very important trades that I'll use my whole life. When I finally left construction I was making nearly 20 an hour and was still getting about 20 hours of overtime so thats 30 bucks an hour. I'm certain I could of moved up and started making more or i have enough experience under my belt to start my own company. never went to college or anything. given construction is physical back breaking work but its not so bad as long as you got some thick skin and don't mind working hard.

Try landscaping. Even then you'll make more than 7 an hour. Plus most landscapers I have worked for smoked and were fucking cool people. And you work outdoors. You'll probably start off at like 10 an hour. Granted, its probably a little more physical then anything else you've ever done but its a damn good job.

as for the rest of this thread i haven't ever had any real life plans since I quit school at 17 and after reading a few post here I'm glad I never tried to plan anything out. Fuck it. I like not knowing whats right around the corner for me. some of you guys seem stressed out trying to figure your life out.

 

[C21H30O2]

wu wei

 

[thekingofNY]

What kind of shit jobs do you keep applying for?

I quit school at 17 and when I started working construction I started out at 10 an hour and I was making 20 hrs. of overtime a week which is time and a half (15 an hour). I was bringing home bigger pay checks then my parents and every single friend I had at the time. I also learned some very important trades that I'll use my whole life. When I finally left construction I was making nearly 20 an hour and was still getting about 20 hours of overtime so thats 30 bucks an hour. I'm certain I could of moved up and started making more or i have enough experience under my belt to start my own company. never went to college or anything. given construction is physical back breaking work but its not so bad as long as you got some thick skin and don't mind working hard.

Try landscaping. Even then you'll make more than 7 an hour. Plus most landscapers I have worked for smoked and were fucking cool people. And you work outdoors. You'll probably start off at like 10 an hour. Granted, its probably a little more physical then anything else you've ever done but its a damn good job.

as for the rest of this thread i haven't ever had any real life plans since I quit school at 17 and after reading a few post here I'm glad I never tried to plan anything out. Fuck it. I like not knowing whats right around the corner for me. some of you guys seem stressed out trying to figure your life out.

you remind me of one of my 2 best friends back home... complete fucking opposite of me While i LOVE the outdoors, I am showering in a bit and going hiking/smoking in a few.... i would never want to work outside. Well I take that back, it depends on where I was living at the time I guess. Up north it wouldn't be half as bad...but I just can't imagine any job I would enjoy doing... physical labor? Thankfully or not I have a bad back already and that woudln't really be possible, I mean I moved a few months ago down 3 floors and up 1 at the new place, and I could do light physical activity, but no contruction... besides I am not really the type for it. I get paid to be on a computer all day, or if I am no on the computer I am helping someone else use it or training them too... its nothing like office space, although I do occasionally ask my boss or coworker "did i not get the memo? was there one sent out?"

even when i know their was/is no memo. and then every once in awhile i'll make a TPS report comment if its justified...even at highly inappropriate times, like meetings